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Time for a change


Lord Sornoff

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What ho, England rugger men!




Now, as you all know we're in a damned rough spot concerning our under-performance in the 6N of late, and I'm bloody well fed-up of it.


We were clinically dished by O'Driscoll's Fenian cur's at HQ who skulked about on our gainlines like Jackals. And repelled our scrums with almost no effort at all. Not to mention illegally sacking English mauls. But I'm not bitter. Though I wont go into what happened at Murryfield.


But, aside from complaining, we should be looking into the cause of the embarressment. I've been racking my brains chaps and I think I've come up with the goods. It isn't the facilities. It isn't the coaching staff. It isn't the schools that churn out our magnificent (yet currently underperforming) shire beef. It isn't even the opposition.


It's bally Jerusalem!


It's just too damned staid. Not enough fervor, not enough character, not enough spunk and definately not enough appeal to our younger audience. What we need is something to really get the crowd on its feet. Something to really cut through the mist. Something that screams: We'll get through, no matter the odds!


Rugger men of England (and dominions, if you care to opine). Imagine our brave boys running out to the sound of this belting through the fans and speakers alike.

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When I want the oikish sarcasm of proles who support football teams (not you Mr Lush, you offered a sensible if alternative contribution) I'll ask or send for it.


Rosie, old duck. Forgive me for appearing a little out-dated but I did quite clearly state that I was looking for the opinion of men. Not fillies.


As you were.

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