Deleted due to disagreements

[Mum2be]

Sorry what a mistake that was

[hpsaucey]

I've never heard 'boys are lazy' before! Glad you are so proud of yours.

Boys are individuals - just as girls are - and will develop as individuals. My first one - desperate to crawl. Number two -not interested - just wanted to climb.

Let give it up for children doing their own thing in their own time! Its a fascinating journey to watch and a privilege to be part of.

Helen

[Monkey]

Fascinating indeed.

But why are we so obsessed with the "milestones"? Why do we want them to grow up so quickly? It's really getting on my nerves.

Mother in law at the weekend: "If she had not gone to nursery, she would have spoken earlier." Why the hell does it matter?

[Strawbs]

I havent heard that boys are lazy but am often reminded that girls are ahead of boys. My son is very active and was early to crawl and walk (ok run from sun up to sun down) but he is slow on his talking, honestly I am just going with it as I am sure he will pick it up soon..

[sunbob]

Your little boy sounds like he is doing fantastically, congratulations. Please don't believe or perpetuate the myth, however, that being later to meet milestones or gain skills has anything to do with laziness.

[hellosailor]

Gosh I've never heard anyone say that children who are later to hit milestones, girls or boys, are lazy, but I agree people do talk a lot about girls being ahead of boys in certain things. I also don't get the obsession with milestones, particularly when people are desperate for their child to be able to walk, and very frustrated if they do this later than their pals, when it is sooo blissful being able to go to a picnic / cafe / pub lunch with a baby who can't walk!

[SE22mum]

Totally agree Monkey. I mean, it's not as if we put in on our CV or something - "first step, 12 months, first word, 18 months...."

[Mellors]

Riley sounds wonderful.

As is each and every one of our children on their own merit.

End of.

[sillywoman]

I'm so impressed you can recall his many milestones so accurately. Clearly Riley gets his brains from Mum! :D

Mellors, I was looking for the 'like' button for your post. Clearly I spend too much time on FB!

[midivydale]

Never heard that expression myself, thankfully.

My mum once said to me "you son will sit/walk/talk for the next 80 odd years - God willing-so really there is no rush with any of it".

One of the most useful things she has ever said I think.

[Mellors]

I love how kids wake up like each day is a massive new adventure, and cry at bedtime because that adventure is over.

I wish I was like that as an adult - I tend to be the other way round these days :D

[mbennett]

Well my son has been late to hit all his milestones but he definitely isn't lazy he has just developed at a different rate. You sound very proud but also a bit silly to be putting so much emphasis on milestones.

[crystal7]

> don't get the obsession with milestones,

> particularly when people are desperate for their

> child to be able to walk, and very frustrated if

> they do this later than their pals, when it is

> sooo blissful being able to go to a picnic / cafe

> / pub lunch with a baby who can't walk!

Me neither!

[snowboarder]

Sorry I really do have to say - after nearly 5 years of reading/taking part in this forum - this is one of the most perplexing posts I've seen....boys are lazy?!? Wow. As everyone else has said they are all amazing little people doing their own things in their own time.

[Pickle]

If the OP didn't have posting history, I would have taken this as a wind up. Seriously, and no disrespect, but you need to stop recording the "milestones" and sit back and enjoy your baby. I have no idea when my youngest did most of those things, and really couldn't care less. For me,

1. Are they happy?

2. Am I happy?

If yes to those things, then all is good.

Also (sorry), you need to think a little bit about those people reading who are not as "lucky" to be blessed with a genius milestone-beating child, and are potentially sitting at home feeling a bit rubbish right now.

[womanofdulwich]

I agree but it is important to record milestones.

esp if there are problems later on, like autism, AS/ADHD/deafness etc etc

[sillywoman]

I've never heard the "boys are lazy" thing either and have 'owned' a few for 16 years now. I thought that it was maybe something I'd missed, but seeing the surprise expressed by other family room regulars I think that maybe the OP is hanging out with the wrong crowd?

Am looking forward to hearing of Rileys Oxbridge acceptance in the near future.

[JulieP]

I have two boys.

They are polar opposites.

One slow to crawl and walk, laid back (and possibly a bit lazy - if he can get someone else to do it for him he will).

The other started jumping when he turned one and hasn't really stopped since.

They are two different little people and I love them to bits - but not for what they can do.

Also never underestimate a slow burner, they may turn out to be a late bloomer (the hare and the tortoise and all that).

[redjam]

I also think this is quite a weird post. As others have mentioned, I have never in my life heard the expression 'boys are lazy', so the list of your son's amazing achievements seems a bit unnecessary. While I am delighted that 'his development is so advanced' and he is quite 'the king of soft play', I feel that's the kind of mummy pride that's best not shared aloud, particularly as not everyone will have such a broccoli-loving, articulate, weeing-on-cue prodigy.

As for my own kids, my first (a girl) was extraordinarily slow meeting some milestones - to the extent that doctors were worried - and extraordinarily fast in others - to the extent that health visitors didn't believe me. I tried not to care too much about it at the time, and certainly now, nine years on, it all seems laughably irrelevant.

Milestones, schmilestones. I'm glad your son is happy and healthy, I really am, but everything else is neither here nor there.

[Mum2be]

Aw well that's sad :/ didn't mean so so much defence just wanted to point out that boys are not lazy which I have heard many times even by child professionals not by the crowd I chose to hang out with

Milestones are important no matter what age the child is of course they should be recorded that's why it's in the red book right ?

Sorry to those of you who maybe havnt had time to look through that , as a first time mum I felt it quite important

Of course when children are 4 they are all doing the same thing more than likely I'm just shocked every day at the things my lo does

Like I said over proud ..... Maybe but who isn't ?

[Mum2be]

Also I would be just as proud if he walked at 18months and potty trained at 3 but you gota be a little excited about it all happening early , maybe my second will give me a little longer with a cooing baby and not growing up so fast

[fl0wer]

Having raised a family in the 1970's I was used to hearing this 'boys are lazy' idea, so it didn't seem like a weird post to me.

In its many other forms the stern judgement from older family members was that sons easily became 'mother's boy' or 'spoilt' if you kept them at the breast longer than 10 minutes, picked them up at night, or kissed them when they cried, and other natural things like that. I rebelled and worked with the beautiful child I'd got, at the pace he wanted.

Aaaaanywaaaaaay....

Only much more recently scientific articles about testosterone affecting the unborn baby have been published. The gist is that all babies after conception make their first few clusters of cells at the same pace, but only up to the point at which their gender is decided.

If the XX/XX pattern persists then your girl baby will keep growing steadily in utero, and her developmental markers will remain a short way ahead of a boy child's for many years to come.

For the male, XX/XY foetal stages slow down very slightly because it is "harder work" forming itself into a boy. More energy goes towards differentiating the body of a son, whose testosterone levels will be that of a 25 yr old man at birth (soon dropping down to much less) and the boy's brain at birth is at a slightly less mature stage of growth than a girl's. The comment that a boy's milestones take slightly longer to reach is thus not about laziness but about capacity.

It is only slower by a matter of a few weeks.

I think the slower onset of puberty for boys is a fairly universal phenomenon & a clue to the way it goes on being slightly out of kilter for male & female children. The girls mature sooner. But the earlier and earlier m?narche of today's girls, compared to the slow adolescence with a first period typically not until 16/17 yrs old which our great-grandmothers expected, could be a topic for a separate thread.

Another interesting thing is that the skeleton M or F does not finish growing completely until you are 26, suggesting that full adult strength takes that long to reach.

[Saffron]

Oh, Mum2be, so sorry that you felt your thread was a mistake! Sometimes things get misunderstood when not said in person. Comments can get taken out of context on either side of an opinion. Obviously some people cherish milestones, while others value different experiences in raising children. There's no wrong or right.

People say all kinds of crazy things about children... boys are this, girls are that... big babies do this, small babies do that. Most of it is rubbish, conversation filler, or simply very badly formed opinion (sometimes even from medical professionals!).

As flower elegantly points out, there are some small but very significant differences between males and females from conception. But of course, we don't live our lives as statistics, but as individuals.

I hope you continue to celebrate good milestones and a happy parent-child relationship. And, when people tell you things like 'boys are lazy,' just nod and smile to yourself, because you know they're talking complete bollocks.

;-)

[Otta]

Why would anyone be "proud" of their kid walking? That's like being proud of them breathing.

I agree that keeping a record of milestones is sensible, as they may be needed down the line. But to take pride in them suggests it's something you've acheived. Which it isn't, it's just stuff that happens at some point.

[SE22mum]

I think the issue is that some mothers are made to feel by people around them that their child is not doing things right and worry that they might be to blame in some way. remember lots of mothers are very vulnerable.