Top tips for baby routines?

[verds]

Have any of you wise posters got any?

Cheeky BabyVerds is about to hit 4 months and so far I've been the anti Gina Ford. But now I'm thinking we could do with a little more structure. I know it's still early and all babies are different, but I wondered what other babies did at that age.

She sleeps very well at night - a few times until 8am! And more times not... We feed a lot in the evening and have a regular bath time, but it's the days I'm thinking about. The morning nap seems to be vital - if I take her to anything in the morning like yoga or music groups she shouts as if to say "But I'm tired!" So I've kind of given up on morning activities, but I would like to get out a bit more.

Or am I expecting too much at this age?

Thanks!

[Moos]

My (limited) experience suggests that a regular daytime nap (or probably two or three at your daughter's age) is really helpful in getting a happy baby who also sleeps better at night. My son didn't settle in a routine of daytime naps until he was 7 months, at which point he also started to sleep through the night.

What many people do is a half-hour nap or so in the morning around 9 or 9.30, followed by a lunchtime nap of a couple of hours, followed by a tea-time nap. My son was on two naps at 7 months, and dropped his morning nap at around a year old. Best is to look at what you want to do during the day, and what suits your daughter, and shape her naps accordingly. But it will take time and patience... so good luck! I don't really believe in sticking to a strict routine but the message that comes from other mothers time and again is that what suits them best is what works, rather than what other people think they ought to be doing.

[EDZ]

Baby's love routine. Gina Ford is good, but don't take her routine to the extreme's she does (especially for the new borns!). From my experience and what I see, most babies start to fall into a routine around the 4 to 5 month mark and by 6 to 7 month's its easy to have a good routine. Basic outline seem to be (as per Gina Ford), up around 6-7am, nap again at 9am for 45 minutes or so, then another nap around 12:30-1 for up to two hours, then another nap around 4pm (this naps tends to no longer be needed around 6 to 7 months) and then bath and bed by 7pm. Young babies need their morning nap. Generally they always seem to crash about 2 to 3 hours after they first wake and then again need to crash again 2 hours after they wake from their nap. I think I read somewhere about the 2-2-4 hour rule. Wake for 2 hours, sleep, then wake again for 2 hours, then sleep (longer this time), then wake for 4 hours then bed time...or something like that.

[gwod]

Sounds to me like you've sussed out his routine without help of either the over regulating GF or the baby-led unstructured day police. Just perfect. You can notice when he's most usually tired, and factor in a sleep for that time to get the most out of his waking hours. Hooray for the good old days when mums listened to their babies and made a plan specifically for them, and congratulations to you and Babyverds! (PS All of my kids needed a little hour's kip in the morning at about 9.30 until they were about 8/10 mnths old)

[quickbrownfox]

I liked the Baby Whisperer's EASY approach - which is really just a cycle that you repeat a few times a day.

EAT

ACTIVITY

SLEEP

You time (cheesy)

It means baby expects certain things to follow after one another, but you can make those intervals longer or shorter depending on what you need to do, or what they need they day.

[Fuschia]

2-3-4 I think it is.

Mine for a long time would have a nap (about an hour) 2h after waking, then a further nap (2h) 3 hours after that and then go to bed 4h after that.

Awake 7 Nap 9.30ish Wake 10.30 Nap 1.30/2 Wake 3.30/4pm Bed 7.30ish.

At 15months mine now sleep from 10-11 and 2-4 though I'd prefer them to nap after lunch as it would be easier to get out to activities (and Saint Gina does recommend 12-2pm I believe) but no way could they manage to stay awake till 12 noon!!

[fuzzyboots]

Hopping in on the back of this - whatever your routine turns out to be, can I recommend that you sing your babies through the transition from one "activity" to the next? This is done a lot in nurseries to ease children out of playing one thing and then, for example, it being time to tidy the toys away.

If your baby can learn the cues for things like nap time, bed time lunch time, bath time, etc very gently by you singing a familiar song that they learn to associate with this particular activity you will find that they make the transition very easily.

For instance, when I start singing twinkle twinkle little star (or the Sing and Sign lullaby) to my 3 and a half year old, he immediately starts yawning and looking drowsy! Fabulous!

Of course, I would recommend signing about your routines with your baby, but the music trick works like magic if you're consistent. That way, if the timing is out of kilter on a day to day basis, at least you can trigger the desired transition to an activity without any fuss, simply by singing.

HTH!

Trish

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[quickbrownfox]

Does it work (the singing) even for tone deaf types like me?

[fuzzyboots]

Sure! Babies pick up on the rhythm of the words, if that's all there is on offer. They are remarkably clever if you just trust them to be. Honestly, some of our mums in classes are not the best singers (although not all of them seem to be aware of that...!) but it doesn't matter. As far as your baby's concerned, you have the most lyrical, enchanting, lovely voice in the world, even if you croak like an aged, hoarse frog. :)) Sing up and sing proud!

[verds]

Thanks for all the reassuring, wise words! I think I'll try the 2-3-4, and definitely the singing - we sing all day long, but I hadn't thought of it as useful...

[fuzzyboots]

Music is incredibly soothing and reassuring to babies. And very very useful in so many ways. Could wax lyrical about it endlessly (;-)), but would be rather off topic!

Nursery rhymes, lullabies, etc... they don't exist just for fun! They're incredibly useful training, learning tools and well as the stuff of happy childhood. In existence well before any expert decided to even write a book or have a theory. In fact, I suspect they were in existence pretty much since the dawn of mankind formalising verbal language. Don't think it would exist in so many aboriginal cultures throughout the world, otherwise.

Try it and see. I bet you don't regret it! I still sing a lot to my children when I'm doing the transition thing and I often sing instead of speaking. Helps lighten things up a bit and certainly improves my mood!

[BellendenBear]

The morning nap is crucial and the success of this seems to make or break the whole day. Back in bed by 9am (2 hours after waking) even if others are telling you they don't seem tired.

Also agree with the baby whisperer EASY thing being good - less regimented than GF but still works on the approach that babies thrive on routine, just a routine that you have found to suit them rather than a generic one.

For me and my 5 month old, the morning nap and a good feeding routine were the keys. Again I found the baby whisperer useful to fix a 4 hourly daytime feeding pattern with a blissful 8 hours overnight.

[fuzzyboots]

@BellendenBear.

Really like your view of babies thriving on a routine that suits them rather than a generic one. Complete commonsense! One size routine does not fit all, but that doesn't mean a different routine couldn't work perfectly. Why didn't I think of that nearly 20 years ago with my first one. Would have been SO helpful, instead of stressing that I "couldn't cope" with routines.

T

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