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The East Dulwich Forum
The Bishop, The EDT, The Great Exhibition, the Actress or another?
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messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 09 April, 2013 19:16

"Oy!! My Razzle is in that Manifesto. Its a "Dulwichmum" original"

*Thankfully Mrs T is strangely impervious to fire, probably a good, all things considering*

"Has anybody got the key to the gun room? My elephant gun is stored there and I need to put a newbie out of our misery. Ah yes here it is, under the half full soda stream bottle"

*Opens lavvie door, grabs Manifesto/Razzle off red devil. Hand Manifesto back*

"Sorry! Meant to mend that lock years ago, Mrs Dobbin the lactating donkey kicked it open when suffering from mastitis. Nice undies by the way"

*Settles in comfy chair with Razzle, elephant gun, gun-oil and rags*

*Whistles tunelessly*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by maxxi 09 April, 2013 19:54

*Outside door am nearly knocked over by 'Rags'* - (pedigree fox-cat-cross and leader of the Fellbrigg Rd wolf pack)

*-who shoots out of newly-installed cat flap* - (I'm a dab-hand with a router, MDF, & a 360 hinge - it also scares Woody away)

*-fleeing awful whistled version of Dark Horse by George Harrison*

*-and overpowering smell of gun oil and bhaji liniment*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by ££££ 09 April, 2013 22:16

*stirs from stupor, looks at empty bottle throws at fireplace*

Has it passed yet the banal, vacuous twittering of the ignorant?

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 09 April, 2013 22:47

*5 hours later...flushes loo, opens window...looks at ££££*

I wouldn't go in there if I was you...night night

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Peckhamgatecrasher 25 December, 2013 05:42

*hides "Razzle" behind throne and reverently dusts it down for Her Mumness"

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 26 December, 2013 09:46

*Repairs lock on lavvie door and discreetly places an Airwick behind the 'throne' to counter 'lingering smell'...*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by dulwichmum 26 December, 2013 10:28

Albina wafts in for a touch of damp dusting but decides a total refit is in order. 3 drives past with an industrial floor sander, 2 coats of industrial floor varnish and 6 litres of Farrow & Ball Elephant's Breath later and she can finish off by damp dusting the plantation shutters.

Hurrah! Next year will be the best year ever. Looking forward to the best New Years party this postcode has ever seen (faints).

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by KalamityKel 26 December, 2013 14:22

Plantation shutters? oh dear! I fear you're slightly out of touch with the recent trend DM that's like sooooo last year!!!

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by dulwichmum 26 December, 2013 17:40

I was thinking that myself, but I really can't find a window treatment I like at the moment. What would you suggest?

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by maxxi 26 December, 2013 23:59

dulwichmum Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I was thinking that myself, but I really can't
> find a window treatment I like at the moment. What
> would you suggest?


I'd suggest something retro yet daring-

A Windolene white-out with finger-written messages (according to season etc.) and an optional newspaper/sellotape collage over the hole where the xpelair was.

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 27 December, 2013 04:07

dulwichmum Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Albina wafts in for a touch of damp dusting but
> decides a total refit is in order. 3 drives past
> with an industrial floor sander, 2 coats of
> industrial floor varnish and 6 litres of Farrow &
> Ball Elephant's Breath later.

I see that your skin care regime has become more assertive in your twilight years. Good to have you back I was rather expecting to see you in a "Those that have passed in 2013" article in People Friend.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit was 2013:12:27:04:09:08 by Michael Palaeologus.

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 09 March, 2014 10:49

*Pinches nose...coughs...splutters...brushes cobwebs away...opens French Doors...*

It's Spring! smiling smiley

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by El Pibe 09 March, 2014 11:38

*glowers in grey, dank corner*

*mumbles* speak for yerself

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by KalamityKel 09 March, 2014 13:30

*glances over in other corner wondering what the furry mass is...*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 09 March, 2014 17:22

*Well I suppose the Spring clean should start*

*Could somebody take El Pibe outside, drape him over the washing line and give him a good beating? He is a tad dusty*

*There's a great big totem pole in the backyard. That's houldnt surprise me really*

*I'll clear the leaves out of the pool and take the dust sheets off ££££, Otta and Jah Lush. That's a start*



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit was 2014:03:09:17:23:47 by Michael Palaeologus.

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Alan Medic 10 March, 2014 07:54

*tiptoes in*
*looks round.........no sign of a hundred in here*
*tiptoes out before being caught*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Muley 04 June, 2014 17:35

Pulls black balaclava over face and glances round. Nothing moving, or any visible sign of life. Tiptoes in to Quiet Room, silently removes bomb from backpack, conceals it, and sets timer. "Enough Semtex to bring the whole place down. In twenty minutes 'goodbye Quiet Room and all who sail in her'. Mwahahahaha". Exits silently, still laughing evil laugh...

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 04 June, 2014 17:46

*Tippy-toe marks in the dusty floor?*

*Follows them and finds a brown paper box with an alarm clock attached*

*It has "BOM" painted on it in a childish scrawl*

*Takes it out to the back gate where lives the recycling bin with "BOMS" written on it. Drops the box and alarm clock into it*



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit was 2014:06:04:18:48:21 by Michael Palaeologus.

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 11 August, 2016 14:43

Is there anybody therrrrrrre?...






WoooooooOOOOoooOOOoWwwwooooooOOOOOOOOO...


*Legs it...*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 11 August, 2016 15:23

*Notes the bemused faces of so many newbies*

*Sadly dusts the painting of Mrs Dobbin the Lactating Donkey and then the recumbent figure of ££££, in deep repose in his favourite Chesterfield. Picks up the copy of Razzle from his lap and returns it to the library*

*Peels an unconscious red devil off the non-sliding glass door, straightens his nose and props him on the other end of the Chesterfield*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 11 August, 2016 16:36

*Wakes up, rubs nose, looks across at ££££, poor bloke, last time he looked that bad was at Reading '77. Decides to write a note...*

Dear ££££
At the time of writing you've been asleep now for over 2 years.
When you eventually wake up, you'd better know there's some good news and bad news.
The good news is that West Ham sacked Big Fat Sam.
The bad news is he's England's manager...can't win 'em all eh!
Oh, and we're not in Europe anymore, but being a West Ham fan you'll be used to that by now.

Yours,
Red...

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Otta 11 August, 2016 18:24

*Creeps out to the pool, sits on the edge with feet dangling in the water, and thinks about those that came before*

*Sigs and makes way to the kitchen to prepare a fish finger sandwich*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Seabag 11 August, 2016 19:32

*slides the eyes of across in the painting of Churchill, which hangs on the wall*

*makes note of who's who, from the secret viewing point in the obs room hidden in the paneling*

*folds book and puts it the place its always kept*

*descends ladder into cellar*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Alan Medic 27 October, 2016 13:25

*decides to hang out here and wait*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Michael Palaeologus 27 October, 2016 14:20

*wonders why Alan is leaning against the fireplace in a nonchalant manner, with his Gentleman's apparatus hanging out? It's not big or clever*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by red devil 27 October, 2016 14:33

*Seabag, Ferrero Rocher'd out in the Obs room, spies his chance to perform his newly acquired 'Masonic handshake'...*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by TheArtfulDogger 27 October, 2016 14:44

* pads in softly to quiet room *

* looks around for doggy treats, can't smell or see any *

* cocks leg against fireplace and with a long sizzzzzzzzllllleeee the fire goes out *

* realises that it's now quiet and very very dark in here , lets out a silent but deadly and leaves the room *

--------------------
Artful

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Otta 27 October, 2016 15:49

*Looks in through the window and wonders why it's gone dark inside*

*Starts tapping on the window with metal key to freak people out*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Alan Medic 27 October, 2016 16:05

*shakes a leg.Darn hound*
*chief eyes me with a look of distain. shouldn't bother me its happened hundreds of times before*
*it does though*

messageRe: Quiet room...
Posted by Cat in a Hot Tin Bus 27 October, 2016 19:48

* CAT slinks in to the room, vision perfectly adjusted to the dark *

* spies seabag in a Ferro coma in the corner near some logs *

* slinks around Alan's legs but realises they smell and are a bit damp *

* smells tripe and dog farts lingering in the air *

* decides to go next Door to where Mr Jolly lives *



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit was 2016:10:27:19:50:12 by Cat in a Hot Tin Bus.

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