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Greetings frequenters of the East Dulwich forum.

It was today when I was taking my usual weekly trek up One Tree Hill during the last leg of my commute home. A habit I had not been able to fulfil the past three or so weeks due to weather and holidays.

Part of my tradition every Monday, to bring some joy to the most lifeless day of the week, is to go from Honour Oak Park station, up the hill, and partake in usage of the rope swings that were affixed to a large outreaching branch on the side of the hill facing away from Dulwich. One was made from red rope and a single thin branch which you would hang onto for dear life. The other was a far nicer and safer swing that appeared to be made from a zip wire kit, having a round plastic purple seat and matching coloured rope.

Whence I last made my way up the hill, I noted that the more dangerous of the two swings had somehow been impossibly wrapped around the tree branch and was thusly inoperable and unreachable. Oh well, not so bad, right? The better swing was still there, I could still swing a good three or four metres, at least two metres above the ground at the furthest point, and feel the wonder of looking out over a suburban section of London whilst listening to and belting out songs on my AirPods.

Today I climbed up the hill only to discover that both of the swings have vanished without a trace. All that remains is a piece of beige rope tied around the tree branch that has not had anything attached to it since I first started traversing the hill and is completely unreachable.

This is unacceptable.

If the swings are planned to be replace with newer, nicer ones, there is no sign of it and no notice.

I shan’t stand or swing for this. These swings were a highlight of my week for months.

Whomever is responsible for this injustice, prepare to face your greatest opponent ever. I am relentless, stubborn and hold grudges that go beyond even the concepts of life and death itself.

Prepare for a war of words, unless the swings are to be returned to their rightful place or replaced with suitable newer swings.

If any readers have even a shred of appreciation for the childlike joy you can feel upon these swings in this place, then join me in arms. Prepare your dictionaries, thesauruses, pens, keyboards and letter writing desks. We must take a stand against the tyrants responsible for this terrible crime.

Have a lovely day.

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Someone's a whizz with a keyboard!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Gotta say, it's probably the most entertaining first post, a new poster has posted on this forum, which brings a wry chuckle on a cold, grey, damp, now wet Monday afternoon in SE23. 

Looks like any swinging activity on the Hill of Honour (as it was once called) will have to wait till they are maybe restored or replaced?    

 

 

Fear not, they will doubtless return soon in another guise.  These provided much fun for myself & 12 year old during lockdown & were mysteriously changed on a fairly regular basis over the months.  We stopped going after a ‘see how high I can go mum!’ resulted in a badly broken wrist (now absolutely fine).  But I still have happy memories although the boy now avoids the hill.   

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  • 1 month later...

It is strange. The rate they came and went during covid was very high. At one point there were several now there are none. There was a rumour some grinch from the council was coming and cutting them down but I can’t believe that. They must just wear out from use. 

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