Potty/toilet training advice

[yeknomyeknom]

We are about to start. Obviously I've read a few bits. Any dos or donts from your experience?

[Bellenden Belle]

On the recommendation of people on here I downloaded a book called Oh Crap Potty Training. This was after a failed attempt. I took a deep breath and followed the book to the t:

First two days child completely naked and me watching like a hawk.

Following that a month of him being commando. Her theory is as soon as you put tight fitting pants on a child it makes them think they are in nappies again.

NO PULL UPS! All or nothing but for nap time and bedtime.

She also suggested not to go down the reward path - but just to use encouragement and praise. This was definitely the right tactic for my boy - first time round a rewards system quickly spiralled out of control for me with stickers being given left right and centre and quickly becoming meaningless.

For me, following the method worked brilliantly and quickly.

We also read a book we found on youtube called Poo goes to Pooland which was great at encouraging my little one to be patient and give poo, erm, a little push to send him to his friends in poo-land. It's a book right up there with the classics!

Good luck! And depending on your child's age don't be afraid to stop and wait if it's not going well - I waited three months after my first attempt and I'm so glad I did. Chances are if they're ready it'll be easy.

[monniemae]

I also downloaded the book on a friend's recommendation and about to start this week. Am nervous but confident - book makes a lot of sense! Fingers crossed... and good luck

[simonethebeaver]

We used Oh Crap very successfully, as did a few friends of ours. You feel like an utter idiot, but the pain was short.

[Pickle]

Decide you're going to do it, and don't waver. The worst thing you can do is put them back in a pull-up or similar after a couple,of accidents - persevere and you will be fine.

[Saffron]

We did ours in stages, separate day and night. I also had a cute children's toilet book that I often read with my daughter. If your child is having difficulty staying dry at night, s/he may not be developmentally ready for dry nights, even if dry during the day. xx

[CocoC]

Reading with interest and must download Oh Crap. Sounds brilliant :). When do you know when your child is 'ready'? (Clueless mother of one...!)

[monniemae]

Coco according to Oh Crap a lot of stuff we're told about "readiness" is a bit daft - from 18m she reckons they are ready. I hope she is right because my lo is only 22months! Her nursery suggested she was ready though as for a while she's been saying when her nappy is dirty, and her nappy can stay dry for a while between wees. But even if you didn't have these signs, oh crap is reassuring that you can still go ahead.

[devsdev]

Another follower of Oh Crap. Worked amazingly well. Unfortunately I'm not sure if you can download it (maybe on kindle) as author got a book deal recently.

We also didn't do rewards - flushing was her reward. We stayed at home (it was hot, this was not in London) for about a week so accidents weren't stressful. Also use "big toilet" for poos and potty for wees...which has been a blessing for us! Also I introduced pants (following another method) and then had to take them away (because Oh Crap suggests being commando for a few days) so don't do the whole pants thing first. Bring them in after the first few days.

Good luck - massively stressful but so great once it's done. I was terrible until I reminded myself to chill out - that she would get it eventually!

[SLad]

we used the princess polly sticker book (there's a pirate pete one if your child would relate more to a pirate or a boy) which was ace. We let our daughter read it for about 2 weeks before we started training (set for her 2nd birthday) but didn't let her use any of the stickers until we started. We also did a big trip to the shops so she could choose her own pants (frozen: what else!). When the big day came she was desperate to do all the sticking in for the story itself and to wear her big girl pants. We did the stickers at the back of the book for the first week and then moved on to her getting a new princess sticker (she got them for her birthday and i had to get rid of them someway) for every day that she didn't have an accident. We started a month ago and she just did her first weekend with no accidents at all and she puts herself on the potty. I've never felt the need to let her go commando as she is capable of pulling her pants down (and even leggings to my surprise) and i think it helps them to feel wet.

[etta166]

Try not to be apprehensive about it. I think it is quite straightforward for a lot of children. My first took about a week at just over 2, and my second and third were much easier and younger at the time too. Accidents really aren't a big deal, just take plastic bags and a couple of changes with you when you go anywhere and invest in some laundry sanitizer.

[Fragolina]

We have recently toilet trained my son, he had a complete aversion to the potty (I'm guessing because he's only ever seen us using a toilet & doesn't have older siblings) so we skipped straight to the loo. We have two toilet seats, a soft one with handles either side & a plastic IKEA one. He started off preferring the soft one because we were spending quite a bit of time reading stories on there while he practiced, these days he poos like a pro & is on the IKEA one!

Initially he had a lot of apprehension about the 'plop' so we started off with him doing it on the toilet but with a nappy cupped under him to catch it, after a week or so he got used to it & stopped asking for the nappy.

We also invested in a Pottette travel potty & seat which I've found to be invaluable, he has a knack of needing to go when we're at the furthest point from any loo!

We used a sticker reward chart, which went down very well & we stayed at home for the first 3 days to take the stress out of it for both of us.

Good luck, it's a right of passage for both of you but really not as bad as you might imagine!

[SLad]

O and get a potette portable potty.they are awesome!

[yeknomyeknom]

Ok. I'm 5 days in. It's going ok. Thought I would update with some small tips for anyone reading this with a view to starting potty training soon. It's helpful if your kid already knows how to pull their trousers down and up by themselves. Also, people say "pull your trousers down". That's confusing to children, because in reality you want them to push their trousers down. A small thing but it made the difference to my child.

[yeknomyeknom]

Ok, I'm 7 days in and it feels less like training and more like normal life now. I've kept notes for 7 days and am going to stop now. Yesterday was my son's first fully dry day. I thought I would put a synopsis of my progress below for parents new to potty training who might be interested. I did read Oh Crap and followed parts of it ie we did 2 naked days and are now onto commando day. I won't put him in pants for a few more weeks (the theory being they feel like nappys, so avoid at the start). I still put a nappy on for nap and bedtime. I bought a different brand so they felt like a step change for him and made it clear they were just for sleep. Ok, here goes:

DAY 1: 6 accidents, 2 potty, poo in potty

DAY 2: 1 accident, 2 potty, poo in potty

DAY 3: 6 accidents, 2 potty, poo accident

DAY 4: 2 accidents, 3 potty, poo accident

DAY 5: 0 accidents, 4 potty, poo accident

DAY 6: 1 accident, 4 potty, 2 poo in potty

DAY 7: 0 accidents, 6 potty, poo in nappy after nap

By day 5 my son independently went to the potty 1 or 2 times each day. But I still prompt regularly.

When he has a success we do the potty dance and get a Pixar Cars sticker (big book of the, bought off amazon).

Potty Dance:

Dance like an eejit to Another One Bites the Dust (Queen) with below replacement lyrics:

Duh duh duh duh duh Do the Potty Dance

Duh duh duh duh duh Do the Potty Dance

Do the potty dance, do the potty dance, do the potty dance

Ooh do a wee and poo, do the potty dance

Good luck everyone!

[EmilyPie]

The potty dance is awesome!

[notmyduck]

I read this thread, bought the book and decided to bite the bullet of potty training myself. I found yeknomyeknom's 'real life experience' very encouraging so I thought I would share mine too as the weather will soon turn properly bad and it will be even harder to think about this next step!

My son is 25 months. We started potty training nearly two weeks ago following the 'oh crap' approach, albeit with a top on to protect from the sun (we were away on holiday, why not let him poo on someone else's floor!?). We talked the night before about saying good bye to nappies and then off they came in the morning.

Day 1 - 5-6 wee accidents and a poo on the floor

Day 2 - he told me "don't poo on the floor". He had two small wee accidents and did two poos in his nappy overnight and during nap time. He also asked for a nappy during the day but we discussed having said good bye to them

Day 3 - 2-3 small wee accidents and a poo on the floor, while he was jumping around so ended up well distributed!

Day 4-6 - 1-2 small dribbles but told me he needed to use the potty

Since then, largely very good. A slight tummy upset on day 8 or 9 meant he didn't have great control one day and that was a bit of a shock to him but we talked about it and I explained that sometimes sore tummies mean these things happen. Small wee today in the park (day 12) but he stopped as soon as he realised and did the remainder in the potty.

The most difficult part, I found, is responding to him promptly in a public place. I've ventured out to various places inclufing out for a couple of meals. Some discreet potty-under-the-table (outside) was needed at one place. Yesterday, he announced outside Peter Jones that he needed to go, so we crouched round the corner on Symon Street and hoped the taxis and Chelsea fams didn't mind/notice. I figure, like so many baby/toddler issues, it has to be done and it's more important that we get the right outcome and not embarrass him with an unnecessary wet pant than worrying too much about what passers by are thinking (assuming I can be reasonably discreet). I took a similar approach with breast feeding in public though I think I'm a bit more militant about that being socially acceptable.

How have others found the challenge of needing to 'go' in public and not wanting to risk a long dash to an actual toilet?

[yeknomyeknom]

We are using a Potette which has been fantastic (lining with carrier bags and kitchen roll makes it cheaper too). Still not ideal to whip out a potty in random places but at least it's not wee poured on the street so people have less right to complain. We do however allocate a wee tree in the park (but he doesn't like using it). So far we have had a wee in the potty at the cinema, west end theatre, high street, shopping centre. It's a tad embarrassing but much like breastfeeding, if anyone has a problem with little ones going about their necessary business, they should relax a bit.

[Galileo]

We haven't yet started potty training but I've been following others' stories to steel myself! Someone on another forum suggested Asda value sanitary towels (apparently very cheap) stuck into nappy bags to bring down the cost of using the potette. Apparently only certain nappy bags will fit (from memory the yellow ones from Tesco, but I can't quite recall) so you might need a little research on that.

[yeknomyeknom]

I just bang a sainsburys carrier bag in. I'm dead classy me.

[notmyduck]

Ah, yes just to clarify, we are using a travel potty too (tippee toes with potette liners as they fit better), not pouring wees or similar anywhere I the street!

I used an ordinary shopping bag with kitchen paper once but there was at least one tiny little hole and that's enough for a mess so have gone for the made to order style.