David Peckham

Have they had a bit of a 'falling out'?.

Ah, Sue, there's a common misconception about the etymological root of 'Stinking Bishop' cheese. It's not called that because it pongs like an unmarried uncle, but named after the pear from which the perry is made in which it is washed - hence being known as a rind-washed cheese. A few hours out of the fridge, in a cheese dome, it does get quite ripe, but under shop refrigeration conditions it smells no more offensive than your average Frenchman.

An excellent point, ed. I reckon you could possibly get the cheese down to 75g per person depending on how many courses, the cheese media one is using and the accompiaments. A thicker biscuit can really increase the power of your cheese dollar. I'd also recommend putting all the last year's chutneys and pickles from the back of the cupboard in a single Kilner jar, adding a bit of malt vinegar and a grated apple, then attaching a hand written label saying 'Pikey's Pickle: Autumn 2025'. It's not Megan Markle levels of domestic deceit, but it works every time. Pre-portioning cheese seems arbitrary, but I think acceptable when it's 20 people. It gives people an idea of how much a serving is, and negates the issue of somebody, normally a brother in law or cousin's new boyfriend, not taking their share of the rind. Remember, you're doing them a favour. Somewhere in the room there's an older family member who could see it and never forget. It's disinheritance stuff. It also gives rise to the great postprandial game of 'Cheese!' where guests can swap their share of cheese for another. Tastier than Monopoly and far less cardboardy, cheeses can be traded like currency or commodities. Hard and soft cheeses, dependent on their relative strengths, normally settle at close to parity but I've seen blue cheeses trade at less than half the price. It's a Stilton lover's paradise, if you can hold your nerve. Goat cheese lovers can clean up, but need to beware. As volatile as the 1970's Argentinian Peso, it's up and down like a bride's nightie. I think I'll stick to Neal's Yard, then.

If you're going British, Marks and Sparks do a fantastic Cornish Cruncher Cheddar (get the three year old if it's on offer) and a Stilton/Stichelton which are wrapped in something more like wax paper. I'm pretty sure they used to do a Stinking Bishop which had minimal plastic wrapping, as well.

If you can track down the owners of the now defunct Heritage Cheese in the village, there could be some stock-clearance bargains if you don't mind your cheese a little pre-nibbled.

Precisely. He's either the luckiest man in show business, the poor man's Peter Kay or just a talentless tit depending on your view of his work. The BBC don't use him so much since he took over Question of Sport and Top Gear and tanked them both - around 100 years of broadcasting between them before he went near them. They still pay him £250k a year not to be on TV, though. It's because of the unique way the BBC is funded.

I'd settle for just BBC3 being defunded and Paddy McGuiness being decapitated.

In what way? Maybe it just felt more intelligent and considered coming directly after Question Time, which was a barely watchable bun fight.

There was an excellent discussion on Newscast last night between the BBC Political Editor, the director of the IFS and the director of More In Common - all highly intelligent people with no party political agenda and far more across their briefs than any minister I've seen in years. The consensus was that Labour are so unpopular and untrusted by the electorate already, as are the Conservatives, that breaking the manifesto pledge on income tax wouldn't drive their approval ratings any lower, so they should, and I quote, 'Roll The Dice', hope for the best and see where we are in a couple of years time. As a strategy, i don't know whether I find that quite worrying or just an honest appraisal of what most governments actually do in practice.

Are they like the 'Gilets Jaunes' with BTL mortgages?

There can't be many French, red ones about, but they probably stand out.

He wasn't great when interviewed on Channel 4 News this evening either, but he may get some respite tomorrow with the breaking Nandy story.

To be fair, he doesn't seem unduly upset about the meme situation, and he does sometimes look like a very angry thumb. I'm quite taken by the idea that a load of hairy-arsed British builders decamp to 'A Little Place We Know' in Provence or Tuscany for the whole of August.

Absolutely, Insuflo I very much doubt that anyone other than football fans would have heard of Dyche, much less his views on false number nines, mobile centre halves dropping into midfield or diamond formations. But all middle-aged, portly, bald, gruffly spoken football fans from north of the capital who eschew fancy Dan tactics for the traditional, English merits of 4-4-2 shall be deemed knuckle-dragging Neanderthals by the Wokerati and the Metropolitan Elite. They care not what his views are, only that he looks like the sort of person who may have them. It's political correctness gone mad. But they, unlike Dyche, won't have a pub named after them.

Whisky Macs, like Harvey's Bristol Cream and Cinzano Bianco & lemonade, are a taste of Christmas past sadly lost to many. A little Whisky Mac and icing sugar whisked through whipping cream makes a festive accompaniment to stollen or Christmas pudding.