Sleep training without controlled crying?

[amydown]

Does anyone know of any professional sleep trainers that do not use cotrolled crying methods? I have nothing against the CC method but personally find it uncomfortable for us.

My one year-old is still waking up regularly in the night. I'm making matters worse by breastfeeding him and co-sleeping (I still love both of these but probably doesn't help with his sleeping habits). I don't really mind the night wakings but we are doing a nannyshare and it's proving to be quite difficult for the poor nanny to put him down for naps in his cot.

Having just spent a traumatic 2 hours trying to put him down for a nap in his cot without feeding him (and failed), I feel that I am in need of some professional help as I am probably the source of the problem but really don't want to do CC.

Any advice would be gratefully appreciated.

[edanna]

Have you read The No-Cry Sleep Solution?

[GinaG3]

Hi Amy.

My daughter did the same until 16 months when she started to sleep through. I co-slept until she was around 13 months when we stopped as she was waking regularly for 'boobie' and getting very violent with me. At this point I moved her to her own cot bed next to our bed, so she was still close but not close enough to wake up to the smell of me. I never believed it would work but it did, absolutely wonderful. Thinks just seemed to get better and better. I miss co-sleeping, but its now much better for her to be in her own bed, she has a proper nights sleep and so do we. She still on occasion wakes at around 5am for a feed but this isn't very often at all.

We are fast approaching her 2nd birthday now and to be honest like you I wish I broke the habit of feeding to sleep. At 2 years I think she would be able to settle herself. Its entirely my fault, I love feeding her and have done since the very beginning. The only time she will settle without me is when I'm not around and she is with nana. Otherwise it just doesn't happen. Don't get me wrong breastfeeding is brilliant, but I would advise to try and find something to cut the sleep feeds before they become anymore habitual. I long for the day when my daughter will settle herself, or just want to go to bed and lie down before falling asleep by herself.

I would suggest trying to move over to a cot bed next to your bed now. Then you are without things like the smell of you, and stirring and moving around that could wake her etc. This was a massive leap for us after loving co-sleeping for 16 months but it did work beautifully.

I am also not one for controlled crying so haven't yet taken the step to putting down to bed by herself. I think I'm stuck with our little habit now. Gonna be a tough one to crack I think.

Hope this helped, or gave a bit of insight into our little life like yours.. Good luck with it all. I'm sure we will all get there in the end.

[Fuschia]

i cosleep and bf our twins... however our minder (very experienced) managed to get them off for naps form about 7m just by rocking/cuddling and since they have had a routine of naps (first 2 a day, now one) others can get them settled by cuddling, or going in the car or buggy.

[hanstands]

Same as what F says, I did some nannying with two wee ones that didn't settle on their own in their cots at nap time, this is normal, I just used to plan the day around their nap times and take them out for walks in the buggy or one in a sling and one in buggy and they slept then, worked fine--everyone happy! I used to either come home and chill out or stop off at a cafe and have a coffee.

[Saffron]

I have a copy of the No-Cry Sleep Solution (and No-Cry Nap Solution, and Good-Sleep Guide) that I'd be happy to lend.

[amydown]

Thank you for all the advice. I do actually have the no-cry sleep solution (shame on me). Before having the little one, I never realised the full extent of my total lack of self-discipline. Unable to stick to routines and caving in all too easily. Time to get the book out again...

Gina, I shall give take your advice on board as although I don't mind the broken nights at the moment, I agree that in the long-run, it won't be a healthy sleep pattern for him.

[Fuschia]

alternative sleep cues... music, soft toy, nap at regular time, try feeding till sleepy... code words.. i say roll over snuggle down

excuse one hand typng

[GinaG3]

Also if you try to wake a little earlier than you normally would with him, you should be able to get a bit of a routine in place.

At about 13 months my daughter fell into a horrible routine, of late nights, late mornings and late naps. The key to good naps is early waking and reasonable bed time I believe.

We looked like this at the bad stage..

10-11pm bedtime,

10am wake time,

maybe 2pm and 5pm nap time.

Through a bit of sleep training and waking at 6am we went to this within days..

8-9pm bedtime,

6.30am wake time,

11am and 2-3pm nap time.

So much better and a lot easier to get her down.. I may add up until this point she refused to be put down for naps and preferred to fall asleep on me and stay there, which obviously wasn't very good for me with housework etc.

I don't know your routines but if they seems a little late to you and he isn't getting tired when you feel he should, try shifting the wake times etc. I would imagine this would help your nanny get him down as he should get very tired midday and possibly wont care who puts him to sleep so long as someone does. IYKWIM?!

Hope this helps a little more..