Killer zombies on the roam

[malumbu]

To take you away from thoughts on Brexit and the question of taxing and locking up cyclists, watch out.

I saw two groups of killer zombies tonight, maybe drawn out from their dens by the warm weather.

A mob of them were running up the canal path in Peckham, and a second lot along the Rye near Harris Boys. They were wearing training shoes, shorts and t-shirts and looked gormless and rather dangerous. Some had head phones on no doubt taking orders from the lead zombies. A few had flashing lights to distract drivers which they could then gorge on.

I called 999 and asked for the army to deal with them, using flame throwers. I expect to see burned zombie corpses tomorrow but just in case there are others roaming I thought it best to inform others. So if you see groups of running zombies take care, and don't catch their gaze as you will be in for it.