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My daughter just turned one. And I want to try baby whisperer sleep training. Has anyone had and success with it? Or could give me any advise. We are still breast feeding and I feed her to sleep which I think us the problem. Any advice appreciated. Thanks lily

I'm not sure how helpful this is but I breastfed my eldest to sleep until she was about 20 months old, at which point I went cold turkey on her because I was about to have my second and felt a bit funny about having two on the go at once. Plus I needed to make our bedtime "routine" a lot shorter than me just feeding her until she was really deeply asleep. So I sleep trained and weaned her simultaneously.


We broke our bedtime habits by sending her to visit her favourite auntie without me overnight, which went very well, and then after that by me simply saying no when she asked to nurse (whether at bedtime or not) and cuddling her or distracting her with a song or game instead. For bedtimes, I invented a slightly slushy love song featuring her name, exclusively to be used at bedtime (and preferably out of hearing of any other adult, to save my pride.) It was not a great piece of music/lyric, but it took her mind off wanting the breast and soon that was her new bedtime routine. In less than a week she was going down no problem.


About one week later, I tackled the issue of leaving the room while she was still awake (but after the song). That took a full on controlled crying technique. It was not pleasant but only took 4 nights.


My experience is the older they are when you stop them from using the breast as a pacifier, the EASIER it is to get them down without it. They are "readier". But that is not the conventional wisdom. (The times I used to hear "rod for your own back" from friends and nannies!) I was however very firm and did not lapse into nursing even once after I made the break.


What is the problem at the moment - or rather, what do you need to change?

Hello,

Have you heard of the "no cry sleep solution"?

Not something I've used but heard from others it's quite a gentle way of encouraging sleep without 'props' ie bottles/dummies/boob. Have a google for Elizabeth Pantley and a technique called the Pantley pull-off (ridiculous slightly dodgy name I know!)... A friend used this to help her daughter settle without a dummy, and it can be used for bf to sleep too.

I haven't used the baby whisperer myself but have a friend who swears by it!

Good luck

I weaned by baby off breast feeding gradually between 12 and 13 months by reducing the time on the breast by a few minutes every few days and giving a bottle straight after to top up. This had the effect (i think) of reducing my milk supply so that he couldn't smell my milk in the end and therefore didn't want. There were a few nights of bottle rejection and i worried that he wouldn't be full enought to last through the night.


At the same time though I had just gone back to work, LO had started nursery and was very tired by bedtime which helped A LOT!


We also introduced a story and teeth brushing and more of a structured routine.


I used to breast feed to sleep but that didn't work so well on the bottle so, when he had had enough bottle, or refused i lay him in his cot, said nighty night, love you (same every night) turned off the light and left him awake. For quite a while i could hear him crying/moaning and i'd leave it 5-10 mins before going in comforting, extending time gradually but i've stuck with it and now he's a dream.


He is 16 months old now, has his milk from a bottle then a story and then goes down awake (sometimes when he's really tired he asks for bunny cuddles which means bed). I listen to him talking away or singing to himself for a while then it's all quiet until about 5.30am.


Sometimes i feel it's all happened by accident though as it's a lot to do with them being ready and being tired at the end of the day.


Good luck

Lily, I really feel for you. While she is anxious, it is such an awful, guilty time for you. Her anxiety may be connected to the recent change in her routine, but it may be unrelated too: they do go through bouts of separation anxiety off and on until they are about three. It is a normal healthy part of their development and it really could be a coincidence that is happening now. She just needs heaps and heaps of reassurance and patience until she re-finds her security that you do come back every time you leave the room. It will pass and it will all be ok.


WM x

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