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stressing moving home for first time

Clare H

By Clare H
in The Family Room Discussion

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Clare H

Clare H

Posted
Posted
I've lived in my flat for 13yrs moved in with two small children that are now teenagers and need there own room....I'm moving to a three bedroom house with my own garden yet I'm going from excited to depressed in the space of one day and the council are taking long so not even sure of moving date and the costs of van and man plus one and new flooring my dream home could soon become a nightmare. My daughter has SEN sure I have adult ADHD and my son has bowel problems...any tips how to stay sane most welcomed or cheap carpet lino man plus one and vans....or this week's lottery numbers....Thanks feel better just for the rant! ! Lol have a great week everyone!!!
intexasatthe moment

intexasatthe moment

Posted
Posted

Sometimes making lists can help when overwhelmed .


Remind yourself that the move WILL happen and all this will pass . Soon you will be in your new home .


For now pack whatever you can ,get rid of any stuff that you can ,tick things off your lists .


I quite like this quote from http://lifeafterlondon.com/useful-information/lifestyle-articles/how-to-keep-calm-when-relocating/


"The ?secret? of calm relocation is self-esteem.


Your ?old life? no matter whether you love it, hate it, or a bit of both, will, to a certain extent feel safe and familiar. Now, with only change ahead of you, it can potentially be difficult to maintain your self-esteem (a combination of self-confidence and self-worth) when very little is the staying the same."


But ...it doesn't acknowledge the sheer hard work involved . I suspect the secret of calm relocation is an army of servants !


Breathe ,one day at a time . You're going to get there .

GinaG3

GinaG3

Posted
Posted

I could rant all day about housing. I'm completely with you about the stress. Its exhausting. We've been with our landlord for 5 years, impeccable tenants and she had been really happy to have us. Unfortunately she is selling up as she doesn't want to pass the landlord empire on to her children, she is now quite elderly and less able to move around etc. We are currently in the middle of the court process to be evicted as the council won't give you emergency housing until the bailiffs come to evict you. We are around 4 weeks away from this point. The stress is killing us as a family. We've got a 5 year old daughter and another baby due in November. Of course, falling pregnant and finding out we were being evicted happened in the same week! I've got a case officer at the council who deals with trying to keep us housed and have been on the phone to him today to find out about a property that is frankly out of our price range but perfect for us. He advised me that this morning they had 200 families outside the door at opening seeking emergency housing! 200! The situation is desperate and this is exactly the situation I'm faced with if I can't find a property that takes LHA at an affordable price. My partner works full time, my daughter has JUST in the last 3 weeks settled in to reception and I can't up and leave all this to relocate. I keep thinking I need to just calm down, there are people out there in more desperate situations than ourselves but its really difficult when your in a desperate situation yourself. The council do everything too late, they are pushed to breaking point, they haven't got unlimited funds, the haven't got unlimited housing. The whole thing is just the worst nightmare come true.


I really feel for you, 100% its so difficult finding something so simple as a roof over your head. I sincerely wish you the best of luck in your journey and I hope everything comes together for you very soon. Try not to worry and panic as it only makes things seem worse than they are. Its difficult, sometimes I wish I could take my own advice but its really what we have to try and do in these situations.


P.S there are a lot of recommendations on the forum for removals and also a lot of people willing to help or give what they can locally. Were in a good part of the country for that, it would seem. I love the community here!


x

  • 2 weeks later...
Clare H

Clare H

Posted
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Posted

Oh wow thank you all will give the man recommended a call any affordable help would be grateful.


GinaG3 thank you for sharing your story I hope you feel a little better although I can't imagine my stress is anything like your.

Get a social worker contact your local MP they can help that how I finally got to the top of the list otherwise I'd still be in the middle losing the will to live with two teenager's in one room one with SEN, the other with Crohn's.


I'm sure once I'm there all will be great I have update work should be done end of next week then hopefully view the following week get keys and then 9 days to clean floor upstairs and down pack up the rest of it all and do the big move.

Doctors dentist schools so much to do...i have started lists which is helpful so much to think about.

I work 16 hours a week with chronic fatigue syndrome and am robbed of any overtime I try and scrap sometimes I wonder if I worked it out if I am actually better off working it's crazy I would work for nothing as hard it is it gives me purpose.


We have to keep trying and deal with these challenges as no one else will take care of out kids as we do. My daughter was abused last year at a boarding school I didn't want to send her to but offered the best chance for her special needs then our worst nightmare became real it's only been a year and we have all been damaged this house is going to be what we need there own rooms my own garden....just sometimes it seems so hard but we got to learn to play the system not battle against the serious injustices...i seek change in education which has started by the hopeful introduction of mandatory reporting could have prevented my child's abuse and others it's just crazy.

I can't wait to move to West Dulwich I have already met such lovely people and shows what amazing people there is amongst the craziness.

Thank you all ill keep you posted.


GinaG3 please stay in touch and let us know how you get on. You keep at them you will get there.

Xxxx

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