Wanted: Ability to put socks in laundry basket

[BECKENHAM CENTRAL]

Unfortunately, as a man, I lack this ability. Try as I might, the never seem to go in. They either sit next to it, pushed out by an invisible force field, no matter how many times I throw them from across the room.

Apparently, even Magic Johnson, with his incredible abilities with an orange ball called Wilson still can't get his socks in the laundry basket. Balls, yes. Socks, no.

How do I disable this strange force that covers the top of the basket? My wife seems very good at it, although her socks are made from an almost invisible substance. Some of my clothes automatically find their way into the basket from the side of the bed and the bathroom floor but I've yet to discover how. But not socks. Even when I carefully balance them on the top, they seem to fall out.

I've even gone into Robert Dyas, but even JML don't have a device to solve this problem. I scoured the back pages of the Daily Mail, and while I now have a bath with a door, a large slipper for both feet and a sleeping bag with arms, I still don't have the ability to put socks in a laundry basket.

Please help as my wife is getting rather cross and has taken to putting a thousand cushions on the bed (so you can't get in it) in retaliation.

[oliviaandmilo]

Maybe something else your doing wrong? Socks always pose a problem. Put many pairs into a washing machine,however not so many pairs come out!!! All the best.

[Tigres Pride]

Have you tried cutting out the middle man and putting them straight into the washing machine?

[BECKENHAM CENTRAL]

Oh, I can't do that! I might do it wrong. There is a special way of working the machine. I thought you bunged everything in together of similar colours or wash cycles, but apparently there is some baffling logic to how and what to group together based on special algorithms that even Google can't muster, along with special eco potions made from odd smelling liquids that bubble on the stove and large sack of bicarbonate of soda.

I do the dishwasher and another assorted dishes.

[Fly]

Just stick them in the dishwasher as you know how to use that.

[BECKENHAM CENTRAL]

Thanks for the advice Fly.