Am I crazy thinking about changing school now?!

[bee74]

I have been going crazy for a week when I came across a new school which I seem to like more than the school my son is currently in.

We have just moved to Devon and my son has only started in January (he wasn't at school before). Five weeks in I have found this school (I didn't know the area at all before and I am just discovering it now...) and I am considering switching him, but it is not an easy decision and I wonder if anyone out there has any advice / suggestion.

The issues are these.

The current school has great stuff going for it: it is nearer (relatively) being 'only' 9 minutes drive (3.4 miles), it has outstanding ofstead report and my son seems to be settling in ok after this first half of term. It also has an utterly wonderful nursery for my 2 year old where she goes 9-3 twice a week, which is most convenient.

On the downside it is a COE school and although they don't seem to drum it in they still have to do assembly in church twice a week and have a day prayer but we are not religious at all. It also has no social space for parents and kids to hang out at the end of the day, which would not bother me in ED but here people drive everywhere, so after drop off and pick up, everyone disappear into their cars and since we already live in an isolated house I feel we don't have much opportunities to socialise and my son has no one to play with unless we organise play dates in advance (nothing spontaneous).

The possible new school is much further away - 15 minutes drive (6.6 miles) which would mean I am in the car 1 hour a day just for school and then would still take my daughter to the other school's nursery which is another 17 minutes away twice a week although there is the possibility from when she is three to go somewhere closer. It has a 'needs improving' ofstead report which is clearly not great. Apparently the reasons for this are being addressed by a dynamic new head who has replaced members of stuff, worked closely with the local authority etc, so it seems it could be getting better again (it was outstanding for many years). On the plus side it is next to the beach, literally, and it is applying for 'beach school' status, which is like forest school but for the beach. This means that there is more scope for the pupils to spend time learning outdoors which they already do and also there is that coveted space to socialise (mums have told me that after school they go for walks or picnics or for swims in the summer). This is also because the school is in a much bigger village, more parents walk to school rather than drive. It is also a feeder school to one of the best secondary schools in the area, although I m not sure that we wouldn't get in from our current schools.

This school has kindly offered my son to attend a taster day on Friday so he/we can check it out.

As well as trying to weigh the pros and cons of the actual schools I am also wondering what an impact the move would have on my son who has already been through so much in the last 6 weeks (new house, new location, new school, old friends gone, no dad at home during the week..)

Oh dear. I am having some sleepless nights over this...

Any thoughts?

Thank you so much

[SE22mum]

wow, it does sound amazing! a beach school!!!

I suppose it partly depends on how happy your son is at his new school now? If he loves it, then it could be hard to detach him from it. But if he is ambivalent then might get excited by a cool new school on the beach.

don't underestimate the value of being near to a school though. before I moved to ED we were a 15 min drive away and it really eats into your day! tho I suppose you are driving anyway.

[Natalie Doula]

HI Bee74,

The school that would like to change your son to sounds fantastic. Our experience was we changed our daughters school when she was in year 2 so she had been there almost 2 years. It was daunting but on day one at her new school my daughter was SO much happier, and we knew we had made the right decision:)

The impact on your son, I would say will be judged on how he feels going to his current school. Of course there have been massive changes for your son recently so do try and take that into account when thinking about the school move, but having experienced it myself I would say if you feel there is a school better suited for your child it is probably the right instinct :)

Schools on paper can sound great but in my experience it is not about on paper, it is about how you and your child feel about the school and how happy they will be . The first thing you need to ask yourself before any school move 'is my child happy'? Because I feel it is about your child and how they feel going to school everyday. It sounds000 like you have all had a lot of changes recently which could affect your feelings towards the school, I would suggest wait a few weeks then review it.

Can I ask if you have visited the beach school? if not then book a visit and try and speak to other parents too.

If you still feel the then go for it.

I hope that helps, any questions let me know :)

Good luck x

[bee74]

Yes, I have visited the school on my own and got a really good feeling. The reception teacher used to work in London and gave me a sense that she might know how to respond to a very boisterous boy. The whole school looks great and has an amazing playground.

The new school has a smaller playground but also a field.

I am trying to judge whether my son is happy or not but I think there is so much going on that he can't separate one from the other. One day he tells me he wants to go back to London and now that we are coming back for half term he says he doesn't want to go. Of course, he is settling down slowly at his school but if we make the move, wouldn't it be better to do it now? In two months time he won't even remember the names of his current school friends whereas if we wait longer he will be very settled.

[snowboarder]

I think do it now, if you think it's right. I went to three schools in reception (moved twice!) and whilst I possibly found it a bit disruptive at the time I have absolutely no memory of it being so now - and I was quite a quiet shy child. A beach school sounds fab - my son is at a forest school and absolutely loves the sessions they have in the woods.

[Natalie Doula]

Hi bee74,

I think because there is so much going on for your son right now it may be difficult to tell what his true feelings are about school, and giving him a little transition time may help you know if he is at the right school for him. I find that no matter how long a child is at a school if it not the right school for them they will not ever settle.

That said it sounds like you feel the beach school is right for him, I would say go with that instinct, you know your child and you know what is right for him.

Trust your instinct :)

Natalie x

[hellosailor]

The Beach school sounds wonderful, I would go for it!

[Ole]

I had been to 4 different schools by the time I was 12 and I don't think it did me any harm. I think it is more important to have continuity once they start GCSEs etc. I'd go with your gut instinct and maybe also ask your son what he thinks? Also be weary about the feeder schools; when I was looking around schools a lot of them mentioned that their nursery feeds into the school, but that is a load of rubbish because estate schools have to go through the usual admissions systems (unless they have academies status I think) so ultimately entry is based on siblings, distance etc, so although a lot of the nursery or primary school kids will go on to the so-called feeder school it is only because it is their nearest school and not because they are automatically eligible.

[Grotty]

2 points: 1) kids adapt and 2) trust your intution. If you think the other school is better for you go for it, sooner rather than later. He's still young and will therefore spend a good 6 years at the new school and will soon forget he was ever at a different school....

[katgod]

would going to school in the other village scupper chances of local pals as he gets older/ If all the kids in your village are at the village school and youson isn't will he get left out? And potentially mark you out as not just 'down from London' but 'too good for the local school'? Just putting the other side - local friends are really important and as he gets older and goes out and about by himself - guess there is not a steady flow of buses between the villahes? Altho beach schol does sound great - but suppose you are not excatly going to be short on beach time if you live so close anyway??

[bee74]

Thanks everyone. Katgod: we are not going to the village schools anyway as we discounted it from day one because it has only 35 kids total and also is COe. However, we have attended a couple of events in the village hall and the families are very nice and have had two play dates with the kids who are local but not at the same school.

Whether we stay at the current school or we go to the beach school, the other children would be spread out. And I would still have to drive him everywhere. Bus?! Ah, what a joke!

[Crokes]

See what M thinks when you visit... but it sounds perfect for him (if you don't mind the extra drive-time).