theasidonio

Ruth_Baldock Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I am assuming you don't have children and haven't > breastfed. They are not saying "look, don't change > your baby's nappy at the table, some people find > it disgusting..." they are asking me to hide > myself away because some people they know are too > bloody stupid to realise that, actually, boobs are > for feeding babies and seeing someone breastfeed a > baby isn't disgusting or rude, but natural. At > least it is for us. It is so uPsetting to be > belittled the way both my daughter and myself are. > And if breastfeeding would ruin their day, then > they shouldn't have invited me. End of. Breastfeeding might well be natural but some people still don't want to see it, I think the bride and groom were trying to be mindful for the majority of their guests. It might be a bit unfair but you shouldn't take it personally, it's a small sacrifice for their day. They aren't asking you to stop feeding your daughter in your home, in cafes, in the park or wherever. It's their wedding day. Respect that.

Ruth_Baldock Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Sorry, the bride and groom upset??? I couldn't > give a flying fig! They aren't providing the room > for my comfort but rather so they're other guests > aren't upset by me breastfeeding. There are so > many offensive things going on with the sitaution > that I can't even list them! They know i am fIne > feeding my baby in front of others, they know us > both very well and they're family. Ha! Oh my. I do hope none of my family behave like that on my wedding day! I think it's sad that you don't care about upsetting family on their big day.

Chippy Minton Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > If you want a sitter, and a child free night, > fine. As a parent that is your decision. It's when > other people decide to make the decision for you > that I take exception to. > > You take exception! It's their wedding and they're > inviting you - you're not entitled to attend! > > However, when people try and say I can't take my > kids into public places which don't require an > invitation, such as pubs, now that's where I take > exception ;-) Chippy, I wholeheartedly agree with you.

Ruth_Baldock Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Privacy, perhaps. But I don't need privacy in a > side-room. I have, and will continue, to feed my > baby whenever/wherever and being told I must do > this behind closed doors is extremely offensive. > Also, if a cafe owner or whatever did that, it > would be against the law. > Suffice to say, I won't be scuttling off to feed > my daughter, tyvm. Have you told the bride and groom you don't need the room? I hope they won't be too upset.

amyw Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > > Just a quick one to say don't judge people for > having a no kids policy. It's not arrogance or a > bad attitude to exclude kids. Although its fair to > say if a couple doesn't have kids when they get > married they are likely less aware of how hard it > is to go kids free. There are a lot of reasons why > a particular venue might be chosen and numbers > restricted and it's not always cost. The hardest > thing about weddings can be juggling the different > expectations of family while still trying to stay > sane. I could provide a host of examples from my > own weddings but that's not what the thread is > about! Agreed!

fapl Wrote: (and if he doesn't behave we take him > outside so as to minimise bother to other > people). > If only all parents were like you fapl. Couldn't count the amount of weddings and other functions that I've been to where some of the parents let their kids run riot in the church and reception. The last wedding I went to, one mum let her 4 year old slide up and down the dancefloor when the bride and groom were having their first dance. In fact, I recall she thought it was funny. You cannot guarantee that all parents will be as thoughtful as you.

Ruth_Baldock Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Cuppatea, I can really empathise with > "breastfeeding Mums are not acceptable to most > people..." > > I am attending a wedding which my children have > been invited to and have been TOLD, not asked, > that there will be a seperate room for me to nurse > my daughter in. The reason? "THAT will make my > guests uncomfortable". > > Well. Great. doesn't having a separate room mean you'll have privacy? I'm just asking!

I am having a child free wedding and my fiance and I are paying for it ourselves. we simply cannot swallow the cost of all the children's meals (we are only getting a discount of ?8 per child under 12). (anyone who says it doesn't cost clearly hasn't had to plan a wedding recentley). We could invite less people so all the parent's could bring their kids but I'd rather have my grown-up friends there. We've offended one parent out of about 18.

I think a breast-feeding mum and baby would be acceptable to most people. I think older babies and toddlers aren't if you are trying to keep the numbers down due to costs/space - it might be selfish but it's only ONE day. Would you expect children to be invited to funerals too?

'Selfish gits' is a bit much. What 'events' is it acceptable for kids to be excluded from? There are parents out there that do appreciate a bit of a break every now and then, a wedding is a special occasion that only happens once in most couple's lifetimes. It is not unreasonable to ask people to get a sitter for ONE evening!

Each to their own. It may come down to cost. Some people just aren't into kids (oh the horror!) and some may be limited space-wise! For me personally, we have a limited number that we can afford to invite and we'd rather be able to invite another friend or family member than have a space taken up by a child who won't remember it, get bored qucikly and push a really expensive plate of food around their plate. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion - a wedding invite is exactly that, an invite. If you don't want to go without your child then you don't have to go! Simple! I consulted all of my family and friends before I sent out invites to 'test the water'. One person was upset her 2 year old wasn't invited but all the other parents are looking forward to a night off with grown-up company!

Ruth_Baldock Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I always assumed child-free weddings didn't > include babies under a year who were still > nursing, to be honest... I've never really thought about it to be honest but i suppose it makes sense. I shall have to put that down in my 'things to consider' list for the wedding plans.

This must be really hard, but you also need to see it from bride and grooms point of view. It's their day and if they don't want kids there then that is their choice - they shouldnt have to make exceptions as it may cause upset to other guests who were asked not to bring their kids. I am planning my wedding for next year and am excluding all babies and children under 18 from the wedding - if i included family children there would be 23 extra places, extra mouths to feed. I think also (as it certainly is in my case - bride and groom want their friends and family to enjoy the wedding and a bit of grown up time!) Can you not have your nanny travel with you and look after the kids in the hotel - that way you can enjoy the wedding and have a bit of time off but still come back to breast feed later? Or you could give this one a miss, let your hubby go and do his ushering thing and you get to spend some time with the kids by yourself?

Have been considering a hogroast or pork/lamb spitroast for our Wedding - has anyone else done this? Can anyone recommend a company? There are so many on the internet I don't know where to start! Thanks!

have you tried contacting the Greek Church in crystal palace? they might know of some playgroups etc? there is also a greek primary school in thornton heath

oven pride! messy but amazing!

paintballing?

Jenny, You can buy florist foam from ebay very cheaply and make your own centrepieces very easily. A friend bought florist foam balls which she placed in martini glasses to make these centrepieces. You could do the same thing with flowers....

remember birthdays choose gifts/cards wrap gifts/cards organise parties

;-)

I must be blind as a bat. The original poster Ellie78 has as far as I can see, only made one comment saying she is having problems with getting in touch with Djkillaqueen. I was wondering if her evaluation of DJKQ's work was the same/similar to Sue. Sue has pointed me in the direction of a comment made by Ellie78 on a different thread which has answered my question.

Thanks Sue.

My apologies, I meant could the OP shed some light on the work djkilla has done. The OP has said she is having trouble getting hold of her but made no reference to the work itself.

perhaps the OP can shed some light on her experience with Djkillaqueen?

Is there a/What is the forum policy on warning people about rogue/rubbish traders? Are you allowed to tell us her trading name?