Mark Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > What's a "proper" pub? And what is an "honest" > pint? I think a proper pub is a licensed premises whose primary function is to serve alcohol in all its various forms. There are salty packaged snacks, crisps, nuts and pork scratchings available on demand. Pat, the guvnor's wife will have access to a nice bit of boiled ham and some decent cheddar. This will be combined with some nice crusty bread, Branston pickle, picalilli, salad cream and on high days and holidays it will be available as a toasted sandwich. Other than that the sarnies are available for a little above cost. Of a Sunday (and it's always 'of a', not 'on a' in a proper pub), the aforementioned salty snacks are placed in small dishes around the bar for free, but in small quantities. At 1.40 pm, Pat will bring down a large dish of roast potatos, nicely sprinkled with salt. Under very few circumstances will the pub extend its legal closing time beyond 11.00 pm, unless someone of importance dies, such as a Queen or the/Earl/Duke/Prince/King that the pub is named after, or of course Christmas and New Years Eves, I mean you've got to, haven't you really? By not applying for an extension to the pub's opening hours it means that Terry, the guvnor can offer a select group of people the honour of 'THE LOCK IN' of a Friday and a Saturday nights, than which there is very little more glorious in life. To get the Terry, the guvnor's approval is to know you have truly arrived in a way that even a 50's debutante's mother couldn't be sure of. Terry could also offer 'THE LOCK IN' on a Sunday, but this would usually be before a bank holiday Monday. Not irresponsible wasn't Terry. And that's it,really. What else is needed? Charity work? That can be done by allowing people to place large bottles on the bar for small donations. It will always be community centred, because it's in the middle of where people live. Children can come in, provided they don't hang around where alcohol is being served and are accompanied by at least one male grandparent. As for an honest pint? What's that? "Evening, give us a pint of Untruthful ALcohol" As silly a cliche as it gets.