Belle

yes - sorry if my post sounded like drugs wd be necessary for everyone, of course it's all down to the individual. I guess what I meant is that the professional advice is usually to go for a combination, but I think that's perhaps more to say that drugs on their own won't be as effective without some kind of therapy. Speculating here though, am not a professional, just a recipient! I found after both births the difference sertraline made was very obvious, so guess am a bit evangelical - but I really think the priority for any recovery is seeking help, whatever that help may look like, and talking to people close to you. As you say, you do need to consider future pregnancies etc too if you go down the medication path. Usually you are not advised to come off them too suddenly so it's not like planning another baby cd be a spur of the moment thing. The southwark pysch team i mentioned are based at the Maudsley, I suspect the same team you refer to HP. There is something v proactive about CBT which I find appealing, and my understanding is that it may help with issues outwith the immediate post partum related stuff. Life in general, basically.

I'd ask you rGP in the first instance, women with issues such as PND and a child under 12 mths are prioritised for psychological assistance under NICE guidelines. Southwark Psychological Services provide CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) which is excellent for PND and anxiety issues. Also though, depending on your needs, some surgeries have a counsellor available (I know Dulwich Medical Centre does). This is the 'talking' kind, ie you just sit and talk through your feelings with the counsellor - I think it really depends on what your needs are, again the GP shd be able to advise in first instance. Therapy combined with medication is thought to be the best approach, like Ruth I've found sertraline v effective. And you can def use it when bf. Sorry just saw you said PM so will do - but leaving this public in case useful for others.

I think poss the latter Saffron? even the litre cartons I somehow think of as 'safer' because they're stored in the fridge and must be used within 48 hrs. thing is for eg with powder you are meant to used a clean knife to level off scoops etc, so can imagine it's being repeatedly exposed in the week or so a tin is on the go. Off to check nutramigen website now...

ha ha! one to gross her out with when she's older!

potty training here so lots of horrible moments, including multiple poo in pants and trying to dispose of poo without landing on my mum's carpet (failed on that one), and yesterday whilst bare bottomed, he 'investigated' whilst he was in the act of pooing, then rubbed the results on his face UGH! and then said to my husband 'oh look i got poo on your arm too'. Just too, too many conversations about poo. Yesterday i answered the door to a guest with a potty full of poo, didn't even muster the energy to explain or apologise.

that's an interesting idea Monkey - might try it.

hmm afraid we do use the cool boiled water...with my first son have made milk up in advance and stored in fridge (was ready made), might start doing that with the baby now he's getting bigger. It is annoying if you're on a formula that doesn't come ready made, we are and I hate it! Re using a flask etc - same issue of having to cool down bottles to make drinkable - I have a baby who def won't wait - is hard enough quickly adding the powder to bottle and shaking tbh, wouldn't manage much longer without the whole street being woken up! I acknowledge the risks but think esp for night feeds the official advice is not that realistic.

I love both Rory and frankie, great names.

are the tablets omeprazole mups? we had them but asked GP if could have the suspension instead - expected a no as it's extremely expensive apparently - and was no problem at all. baby doesn't like it any better but at least a bit easier to administer...worth asking if it is the same drug? we still keep some of the mups eg for when we're away as easier to transport (suspension has to be kept in the fridge). Also - we were prescribed nutrimigen formula (dairy free) - wasn't tested for cow's milk protein intolerance but apparently even without this some reflux babies tolerate nutrimigen/equivalents better than cows or goats milk based formula. It's def helped. Worth considering if you feel you're not getting much improvement in the next few weeks. Sorry if this is all stuff that's been considered...just that I posted on here about reflux and got so much help (worth looking for the thread) and so would like to pass on my help now in turn! x

it's weird, i'm not at all sentimental about that stuff. I do keep things like the babies' hospital tags from when they were born and keep meaning to put them in a scrap book along with pics of christenings/birthdays etc...one day will do it! to be honest I didn't enjoy the baby stage with my first, and am not much more with my second, so guess am not so wistful about it. I think I must be a bit strange because in fact am desperate to get rid of everything as soon as number 2 is finished with it (perhaps trying to underline that def stopping at two?!). BUT - certain foods and smells etc can take me right back. We re-found a lullaby with ducks that tinkle round recently, used to play it to distract my first during fraught nappy changes, and the sound just transports me right back to his early days, it's quite an odd feeling.

It depends what he's doing (is he rigid/pulling legs up/arching back or straining his neck?) but cd poss be linked to the reflux. are the meds otherwise working? My 12 week old has had a terrible time with reflux and before the meds kicked in we had evenings like this, was def the reflux as was as particular pain cry rather than overtiredness/basic wind (though of course he gets those too like any baby). It has def got better...plenty time in sling will def help as calms plus helps with being upright. whatever the cause, it is sooo hard listening to your baby cry for literally hours and not being able to find a way to soothe them - totally sympathise.

feel mean now - J getting one main present + stocking, and one 'from' his little brother. that's it! mind you stocking has some nice stuff in it i guess. It's just I know the family will go mad with pressies. and birthday a month after xmas! we vary food each year - this year doing either a capon or 2 chickens, with a big ham, leftovers for boxing day. always have red cabbage etc. bucks fizz/champagne and smoked salmon on brown bread when opening presents.

gd to hear children grow out of the protein allergy as that is what the specialist thinks our son has, either causing or symptom of reflux. have been worrying a bit about weaning - how the hell to introduce dairy after being on dairy-free formula for instance. anyway sorry for hijack C7!

Totally sympathise too (as you know) but wd say that tho things at 11 weeks still tough at night, things in the evening improved about 8ish weeks so my hope and feeling is that it does get better bit by bit. Like you my first just fed every 3 hrs and went back to sleep at night, so the being awake for ages after a feed or sometimes not even to feed but just for fun, is a bit of a shock. I think the wind /feeding is a bit of a vicious circle - our problem was more reflux as you know but I found I would get into a cycle where he'd be really upset from all the winding/being sick, then wide awake so I'd feed to try to settle/get him back to sleep and then it would all start again. Once he started taking bigger feeds and going longer it got a bit easier. I find he sleeps better at night when has slept well in the day (but seems incapable of long sleeps unless on the move so this depends on what i'm doing in the day). Sleep begets sleep etc.

there's a quest on mothercare.com currently reduced to ?100 : http://www.mothercare.com/Maclaren-Quest-Mod-Stroller-Diamond/dp/B0030GCJLY?ie=UTF8&ref=sr_1_11&nodeId=44346031&sr=1-11&qid=1324057782&pf_rd_r=0VGYWX432TFVPWZKRX28&pf_rd_m=A2LBKNDJ2KZUGQ&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_i=44346031&pf_rd_p=231490867&pf_rd_s=related-tab-3-5

Ko - I could have posted your message, same here. So do totally sympathise Pickle, and particularly because of the stresses which must go alongside the condition, with all the tests and monitoring etc. Guessing you've tried every cream Pickle. I found Doublebase good in pregnancy as my eczema went through the roof, have scarred my legs I think :( Don't know if it is safe - perhaps this late on it would be ok - but my doctors when I was young used to recommend short hot showers to kill the itch (basically similar effect to v cold water). I always took the cotton gloves off in my sleep - and anyway, it sounds like you want not just to not scratch, but to not itch in the first place. Really hope these next few weeks go fast for you, pregnancy with other children to look after is hard enough as it is. Sorry not to be of more help...

oimissus - I wouldn't worry about lack of response, it's not been up that long and anyway if you search on the forum you will find positive comments about the villa (if they're still here - think there's been a clean up of old threads though). To be honest the original post read as someone deliberately trying to badmouth an individual, just my interpretation of course but I wouldn't take it too much to heart...I would go on your gut instinct, from when you looked around and if you're worried go back and speak to the manager a bit more.

I have one for sale from mothercare if anyone wants it - used for my first son, was great though he grew out of swaddling quite quickly so it hasn't been used v much.

I like the bit about active boys - I always think I need to get my son out at least once, preferably twice a day - like having a dog!

I tell you what - I feel glad every day that I'm no longer pregnant with a toddler - found that v v hard work! I felt v emotional just beforehand about the changing relationship too, am sure it's v natural - and in the early days I did feel a bit heartbroken at how things had changed but my son adjusted remarkably quickly, never seemed to focus on the baby as the reason for the decreased one to one time, and instead we have a lovely new dynamic which is him + baby. It all works out!

I think you (at least I did) go through a phase where you think, "how the f*** am I going to do this?! How does anyone?!" Then you look back and realise you got through a week and it was ok.

get out , get out, get out (of the house!) - however long it takes, however hard it is, life is sooo much easier out and about - toddler happier and stimulated (and less needy of your attention) , baby likely to sleep/be calm if in buggy/sling - then can retreat to cafe with bribes for toddler and feed baby if he/she gets hungry. Also meeting up with friends is a massive sanity saver - not just the practical bit where they can help run after toddler or watch baby for a sec while you do the running - but also if you have a friend in similar boat, sharing the stories re juggling 2 really helps. Also - plan food/meals - not just for toddler and not just dinner but your lunch, if you are anything like me - I skipped lunch for ages, and often still do struggle to be organised enough to feed myself - such a mistake. I came down with a horrible virus at 2 weeks in which felled me (and messed up bf considerably). It meant I couldn't do things like taking my son out to playground/nursery/even his bath, at a time when he really needed me. Have been lucky so far re sibling rivalry, though expect it to emerge as baby becomes more able to do things and therefore a rival. Did find we had major tantrums etc from toddler, and am only just starting to address this (10 weeks in) - starting with quality time just me and him at the weekends. If you don't already have a nursery set up, might be worth considering - I know it's expensive but we increased from 2 to 3 mornings a week which has really helped. Feel it is an investment in my sanity...Although I'd planned that to be when I caught up on sleep but unfort baby 2 prefers to sleep on the move...

Coach Beth Wrote: > Personally, I like short, simple boys names - Tom, > Sam, Ollie, Elliot, Ben, Jake > Me too - but it's a bit ridic in our house now as my two sons, and husband, each have 3 letter monosyllabic names - I quite often get them mixed up :-$

Eli works - though is in fact a name in its own right. Didn't get either past my husband though.

Love, love love elijah... also liked Pip for a bit but was vetoed. Nicholas cd be nice (nicky?). Walter. Vincent. I like old fashioned names!