Belle

Hi, we had this very recently with an enforced period of low key time for my 5.5yr old after an ear operation. I posted about it here and got loads of fab ideas, many of which I used: http://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/forum/read.php?29,1331465,1332606#msg-1332606 One thing which we did was try out the cargo bike hire in Dulwich park - he loved it - your 1 year old could prob go along?! We also did baking, and I got the Tuff Tray Fuschia recommended on my thread and did various things with that. We did the Natural History Museum on his last day off school - but we were lucky in that it was term time, so manageable (though still weirdly busy!). The Docklands Museum (part of museum of london) is fab and has a great activity area for kids, with soft play that would entertain your 1 yr old but more mentally stimulating stuff for your 4 year old. Also we did stuff we needed to do anyway but presented them as treats (new trainers, new summer shoes). Good luck. I really feel for you. We also couldn't mix with other children and my son is so sociable t hat this was almost harder than the no running thing.

As an aside, that is a really nice story about your kids and the shy teen. You're quite right to be proud about that.

Thanks James, I don't go often enough to know when they're usually there but I'm sure others on the thread, like Indya above, will have a view about the timings. Funnily enough I was there for several hours this morning, for the first time in ages - and they were not - and all the children were having a great time, kids who don't know each other playing together brilliantly - exactly what playgrounds should be. Do keep us posted.

I wouldn't worry too much re changing clothes. I think all schools vary re PE but particularly if your school has said they're not going to do it formally, it doesn't sound like they'll be changing - and if they did have to, they should give you warning. With reception kids I get the feeling a fair amount of them take a lot of time/need help with changing so don't worry about your daughter in that respect, if it does happen. Snacks - absolutely. I *try* to keep mine healthy except on Fridays when it's more treat time, but it depends what I have to hand and I'm very lenient when it comes to the definition of healthy! I went through a phase in the first term when I realised not having a substantial enough snack was what was causing meltdowns a little later in the day, so I started taking nutella sandwiches in every pickup. He's bored of them now but that tided us over for a good term or so! I still find my son can be an absolute nightmare after school at times. It wasn't till I'd talked to a few teacher friends/my mum (who was a teacher) that I fully understood this. They spend the whole day trying to conform, doing what they're told, following new rules. It's only at home that all the reaction/natural tendency to break rules (if it's there) can come out. I'm not saying this has meant I've always handled it in a saint-like manner but it definitely helped me cope with it! Having said all this I know scores of kids who are really good during AND after school so it does just depend on the child. I'd also say - don't be shy about asking the teacher/TA things. Don't worry about being branded a pushy /bossy parent. Better that you know what is going on. I was far too reticent in this respect in reception and really regret it.

labels4kids, that's the one!

Yes, did singles both times round, both times v low to the ground ones so I wasn't worried about falling, didn't even bother with bedguards. My youngest has been harder to transition, in that he gets out the whole time (having seen his brother do this!) but that's not related to the size of the bed...

I get the sticker type name labels - think they're from labels4u or similar, v reasonable. I like them as you can stick them on to pack lunch items etc as well.

Hi James. Just flagging up a thread which I think requires councillor attention, if you haven't already seen it: http://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/forum/read.php?5,1369121 It's about a group of teenagers in Goose Green playground who have been verbally abusive to parents/in front of small children and are causing a bit of a problem. We're all just discussing the correct approach - is this one for the Safer Neighbourhoods Team? Please can you have a look at the thread when you get a minute and advise us? Many thanks.

I think quite a few people on here clearly HAVE done something, going on these anecdotes. The point of the thread was to share experiences and advice, and the most frequent (sensible) suggestion has been to involve the police on some level. I think this is definitely a good idea (mentioned previously the Safer Neighbourhoods Team) but I also think we should speak to one of the local councillors - James, if you're reading this - as they will probably have a firmer sense of the correct approach (e.g. is it community police or other). I'm happy to 'do something' but I don't frequent GG playground as much as I once did - hence having only encountered this group once - so I'm perhaps not as well qualified to explain the various problems to the police. I'll post on James Barber's thread in any case.

I went today (to DPG) with my nearly 3yr old, 5.5 yr old and my mum and her friend. I was planning on sticking to the gardens while the other 2 adults did the exhibition but the staff encouraged the children to go in, and were very welcoming. I went in with some trepidation - am very conscious that my kids are basically NOT gallery-friendly but I knew my older son at least would get something out of it - which he did. My younger son was happy to have a quick look round in the buggy, and the minute he started getting shouty (to get out) we took it in turns to run around in the gardens with him. On two occasions he ran back into the gallery - through the shop and the exhibition - which I was obviously trying to avoid, but I must say every single member of staff was lovely and so understanding. I wouldn't try the cafe as from experience I don't find it so suited to younger kids but obviously the park cafe is really nearby so we retreated there later. I did keep expecting to be told off, but it never happened, and the other visitors were very smiley and nice. Like most parents I'm hyper-aware and do worry about my kids impinging on others' experiences of things like galleries, but I felt like we struck the right balance today, with the help of the staff. I really wasn't expecting to see any of the exhibition myself, so it was a real bonus. Again, not invalidating what other posters have said, just thought it's worth posting a positive experience.

I actually think it would be helpful if someone from the safer neighbourhoods team popped down and had word with them in situ.

Sorry, meant to include link: http://www.haaf.org.uk/Mainfolder/East-Dulwich-School/East%20Dulwich%20Academy%20-%20FAQ%20Document.pdf

Agree, it's appalling they spoke to Melbourne Groover that way - can well imagine how upsetting that would be, particularly in front of your kids. I think I've seen the group in question and noticed they seemed oblivious to the fact it's a playground (I smiled at them and my 2 year old tried to climb up to them saying hello, they totally blanked us - not bothered by this but it's quite different to the experience I've had with older kids in that playground in the past, when usually there's quite a live and let live sentiment).

bonaome Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > James - do you know when the school could actually > open on the site? At the Habs meeting someone > raised a question around this and I think the > answer was that NHS needs the site until 2017. > Does that mean NHS can't even release the land for > building on until 2017? If so, where does the > school go in the 16/17 and possibly 17/18 school > years? Hi Bonaome, Haberdasher's addressed this in the FAQ document they published last week. They said that given how much of the site is currently unused they are hopeful of being able to use it for temporary classrooms in the first year or two, starting 2016 (this is quite common in the first couple of years of a free school's existence). They say that there are other possible options in the area (for temp classrooms) if for some reason the NHS work precluded temporary classrooms being located on-site. Hope that helps.

We have a ford focus and while we can just about do this, it is not at all comfortable. I find it really uncomfortable and while I'm not as slim as I was pre kids (sob!) I am not huge either. My mum has a Seat (not sure of the model but similar style to the focus) and same problem. For this reason among others we're looking at switching to something like a Renault scenic, with 3 proper seats in the back. It doesn't have to be a 7 seater (think the C Max is??), just a proper 5 seater. Nissan Note looks good,a nd yes the picasso 5 seater also. I'm becoming obsessed! Will have to start saving.

Just to let forumites know that there is a fair at Peckham Rye Playroom (One o clock club) today 11-4, free entry. Bouncy castle, face painting, nearly new sale, food & drink, arts & crafts etc - and a visit from a real fire engine. All proceeds go to Down's South London, a therapy service for children with Down's Syndrome. I'm not one of the organisers but picked up a flyer and will be going along with my 2. Looks like a great day...

Ovalhouse Theatre is the theatre just opposite the cricket ground - they have loads on and do a lot with young people. some of it is quite experimental... but think they maybe also do youth group stuff. They are linked to Truth About Youth London (Tay London) - you can find them both on Facebook/Twitter.

If you can go out of season your options are much broader. Martinhal (Portugal) looks amazing, and your little one would be big enough for the kids' club if you wanted a bit of time off... There are also lots of options if you search on babyfriendlyboltholes. I hear you re holidays! it gets easier when they're a bit bigger as they want to make friends by the pool etc. I never thought I'd go for the kids' club type option but we're off to Crieff for the second time, in August - it's a hotel in Scotland with free kids' club, and loads to do. Guessing you'd prefer abroad but worth keeping in mind.

I had no idea this could be an issue, although our kids have both our surnames so I guess that might be why it's never come up.

Books! that's a good call. J is liking (being read) Famous Five/Beast Quest/Dinosaur Cove/the Twits etc

Does he like Star Wars? We got my son a green light saber for Xmas and then a red one for his birthday - the Hasbro ones are only a tenner from memory - we also got him a jedi costume at xmas which has gone down really well. we were also given (by a kind forumite) - the most fantastic millenium falcon bag which doubles up as a lego-carrier (with little straps for minifigures) - my son loves it. Some kind of lego storage might keep them both happy?!

See how you go - if it gets bad in the next few days I'd push for an on the day appt (even given DMC, I've so been there!) - as when it's bad with reflux you just need to feel like you're doing SOMETHING if you know what I mean. With my first, Gaviscon was all we needed - although it didn't stop the vomiting, it did stop the pain - with my second we went through everything until omeprazole did the trick. As Strawbs alludes to, it can be tricky getting it prescribed - it's very expensive and some GPs don't seem to want to do it very readily. My advice based on a v refluxy baby is push, push, push - you know if your baby is in pain so just ask for what you need. Also agree the regular feeding seems to be for temporary relief of the pain. Poor things. I'm sure you're doing this but I used a sling a lot to ensure my son was upright as much as possible. I also tried one of those reflux cushion things which you can use to safely keep them on their side at night - not sure it did much good but worth a try. It was quite hard to find over here but I noticed recently in France it was sold in baby shops there as a standard bit of kit.

the kicking the back of seat thing I can totally understand is VERY annoying. Trouble is the size of most e.g 3/4 yr olds is such that their feet kind of land there and I've noticed my son doing it without even noticing, meaning I spend most flights hissing "FEET" at him every minute. Canela - that's been my experience of people in Spain towards children too, and also Portugal/Madeira. Makes holidays there really enjoyable.

That said, we've also had many many lovely strangers who have gone out of their way to entertain my kids, which I would never expect - and I don't think they'll realise how eternally grateful I am!

We've had a couple of horrible people on flights and trains. Almost identical to you Vanthorne. On the train, we got a lot of 'we thought this was the quiet coach ' (it wasn't) - that was re my then 1 yr old who we were very careful to remove from the carriage whenever he got too noisy. I had someone move on a flight which I think is the pragmatic approach rather than the passive aggressive way! On a flight to Edin, I think it was our youngest who cried a fair bit (he was getting ill, nothing we could do though we clearly tried everything) and a passenger turned on his phone the MINUTE we landed, made a call and stood literally next to my then 4 yr old and 18mth old saying "these f***ing kids on the plane, parents can't f***ing control them etc". He had clearly no idea that as a grown adult swearing away in front of a 2 young kids his behaviour was far more out of order than any of theirs had been! Very sweetly the airline staff all made a point of saying our kids had done really well and to ignore him etc... I also overheard someone complaining about a crying child on a flight I was on recently (without my own children) - he was saying it was all the parents' fault blah blah. I just really wanted to have a go at him! The child in question was clearly just overtired/possibly had sore ears on landing - it really wasn't being naughty or out of control.