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woofmarkthedog

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Posts posted by woofmarkthedog

  1. I have a message from YOU KNOW TIGER WHO


    He says


    "Ohh yes please


    Do you have a handicap/husband




    "Sorry Honey, what was that ? "http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/hot-chicks-sexy-golf-12.jpg?Oh%20nothing%20Babyw=500&h=675


    Haaa Hee hhhaaaaaa.......NOTHING.....yeeeee jus' singing MJ tunes....


    Ooooooo...



    "I'm bad, so bad you know it....."



    *moonwa*ks across the 18th*

  2. Horsebox Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > TheArtfulDogger Wrote:

    > --------------------------------------------------

    > -----

    > > Is BBW back - how exciting, can't wait to meet

    > him

    >

    > More of an Urban fox than an EDF sugar daddy.

    >

    > Or so I've heard.

    >

    > BBW in 25 posts.

    >

    > Well done, you.

    _______________________________________________


    Horsebox


    Silly old Nag, stumbled at the first


    Then flat into the turf ( nose down ) for the second


    Shall I put the bolt in now ?


    * scrolls up vets number *



    Blimey, if this "F-Artful" is the BBW then I'm blinking Einstein E= mc2 mate


    Stick to "Kerplunk" or whatever that silly old throwing game is you play


    *presses green call button*



    "Eeeeee aaaaaaaaawwwwW...Buckaroo that's the game isn't it .?"



    "Hello Mr Chum the vet...yes W**F here, oh the family is just fine but I have a job for you... "


    *spits toothpick to the floor*




    W**F


    * drives off in the back of black limo, smoke drifts from the back tires *

  3. Yes...


    Prone, Y-shaped on a King Size divan with a fat ol' sugar Mummy/daddy sweating bucketson you twice a week , while you inspect the Artex ceiling


    Is not "making it" in my book


    No....




    W**F

  4. Oh great..


    I've been "the thing" for 20 odd years then


    The "Lobs" are nice IF you have a walk on part in a "Dickens" play


    Just a shade too nice for me


    There is a slight "pik*y edge" to the trickers ( which suits the glint in my eye )

  5. benjaminty Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > david_carnell Wrote:

    > --------------------------------------------------

    > -----

    > > Can't this be about actual shoes that are

    > lovely?

    > >

    > > Like these:

    > >

    > >

    > http://ibsonmens.com/engine/resource/shop/432/imag

    >

    > > es/6c437019-c37c-4e05-b6ad-b504df1e8ad5.jpg

    >

    >

    > David I'm wearing those very Grensons right now!

    > Great choice!



    _____________________________________________________


    Oh.....


    This is more like it "shoe obsessives" swapping info


    The "Grensons" BTW are they linen lined in the front upper ?


    I have a fine pair in black myself


    Though these...

    http://www.thenaturalshoestore.com/images/prod/t/062-75-grn-brn.jpg matched withhttp://www.selectism.com/news/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/trickers-arks-longtip-boots-01.jpg


    Now that's more like it........




    W**F


    * lays down to gather breath *

  6. ludoscotts Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > hi I have a friend that is in search for a lady

    > friend. He is lovely although slightly

    > excentric!he is late 30's he works in theatre,

    > well read,not overweight but not slim. Tall, dark

    > hair, incredible sweet and interesting and would

    > love to meet a lady. As he works in theatre its

    > hard to meet people due to the hours he works so

    > is still single. if your friend would like to meet

    > someone who is lovely but quirky send me a pm.

    ______________________________________________________________________


    Or...


    Tall single "nite worker" male with hair WLTM lady for final journey of self discovery before turning 40

    Weird & out of shape insomniac ( but not dangerous )

    Interests. Theatre, frocks & Musicals



    That should do it....




    W**F

  7. MitchK Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > If it happens it will brilliant and we would be

    > another step closer to being more like Northcote

    > Road. But I fear that the Iceland is too small -

    > the Somerfield site is at the bottom end of their

    > store size and Iceland is even smaller.

    _____________________________________________________


    Oh Puleeze.....


    What, so you can strut along Lordship Lane.... "braying" into a mobile phone....& wearing an oversized "rugger" shirt, cargo shorts & Timberland deck shoes. With your goofy teeth hanging out to dry & a copy of the Saturday Telegraph jammed under your puny arm ?


    Just like the other tossers in SW11


    All the time kidding yourself "Ah yes I made it, saw the potential here in SE22 years ago"


    Yeah ? "like I can't wait....."


    Truth is you can't afford SW11, never could & never will.



    FYI shops on NCR are closing down & it's a Co-op they have there not a friggin Waitrose


    Other than that I bet you use phrases like "cool bananas" & "wow factor" to describe "things"



    "Location location location ? "


    "Oh, Yah... 'pparently The Lane in E.D was on tha' "


    *snorttt*




    W**F


    *throws self out of window of opportunity, after some blue sky thinking*


    ( edited to take the edges "OFF"..FFS )

  8. RosieH wrote


    What's the joke with the punchline about the Baby Cheeses?

    _______________________________________________________________


    OK.....



    ( I didn't tell you this one BTW )


    Joke


    Do you know what I look forward to most at Christmas time

    What?

    Babybels

    Why?

    Because of the baby cheeses





    W**F


    *throws himself down the stairs*

  9. *Bob* Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > (From the

    > www.wikihow.com/Stay-in-a-Buddhist-Temple link)

    >

    >

    > Here is a list of suggested articles that have not

    > yet been written. You can help by researching and

    > writing one of these articles.

    >

    > * How to Become a Vampire Slayer

    > * How to Organize a Food or Clothing Drive in

    > Your Office

    > * How to Fight for Women's Rights in the

    > Workplace

    > * How to Plan for a Terrorist Attack

    > * How to Smoke a Cigar Without Disturbing

    > Others

    _________________________________________________________


    Honestly *Bob*


    You couldn't make it up if you tried


    I was however disappointed not to find *How to; The art of motorcycle mechanics


    There again I suppose the "Zen" lot have covered that "subject" already



    W**F

  10. If I were you....


    I'd tell her how you feel, hug her & curse outloud at her ( she's deaf after all )


    Call her all the names under the sun


    But go & say goodbye, wave her off


    Kiss her cheek, wipe away your tears & be brave for her ( she may well have you in her thoughts as she passes away )



    Hats of to the old bird though...


    " Death & taxes "


    They come to us all



    W**F

  11. Oh..


    Give it a few months "in the shadows of new hampshire's white mountains"


    Soon enough he'll be back for a bit of "EDF sunshine"


    What's the internet for after all ?


    But maybe though....


    ...he's being given a "new identity" & his Boston based " Fed " handlers won't allow him to blow his cover.

    What with New Hampshire being the safest state in the US, it all makes sense


    I suppose though ,at least he has got "this" to look forward to



    "Pwwwaacck..."


    *blows duck call thingy, ponders what he might have done*



    Good luck anyway... "they're behind you"


    ( just kiddin" )



    W:)-DF

  12. ImpetuousVrouw Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > Unless you also liked licking lady bits too :))


    ------------------------------------------------------


    Eewww...


    "Dirty boy...soap your tongue*"



    W**F


    after*

  13. The Odd Shoe/leg Paradigm


    http://www.unescap.org/esid/psis/disability/decade/publications/z15005s3/z15005g/z1500502g29.jpg


    Right and left & odd.


    Oh yes usually it's war of right and left. The truth is, there is no right or left or odd


    There is only a right and wrong( foot/leg/shoe )


    Really...



    W**F


    *drinks mercury from barometer*

  14. dc Wrote:

    -------------------------------------------------------

    > What cheese do you use to entice a grizzly?

    >

    >

    >

    > Come on bear.

    __________________________________________


    dc



    "CLASS"


    You have it in bundles...


    We are "singing from the same hymn sheet"



    Oh yes...



    W**F

  15. There are...


    ...often times when my hands are way too busy & engaged in other very important activities.


    Like cutting collage, typing or thumbing through a Magazine.



    http://www.vibramfivefingers.com/products/images/products/135//large.jpg


    So these come in very "handy" when turning over the T.V , preparing Vegetables or even playing "Poker"


    "Show us your hand"


    They say....


    I show them my "Poker foot"



    Game over....



    W**F

  16. The Yin & Yang.....



    MARTINI.....


    http://www.shoebox.com.au/Products/StockImage.asp?imageNo=3&size=2&stockNo=8065


    Yield: 1 serving

    Vanilla-flavored vodka 1 oz.

    White-chocolate liqueur 1 oz.

    White-chocolate mocha syrup 1/2 oz.

    Ice cream mix 2 oz.

    Crushed ice as needed

    Dark-chocolate shavings garnish

    Dark- and white-chocolate chips garnish

    Blend ingredients; pour into 10-oz. martini glass. Garnish with chocolate shavings and alternating dark- and white-chocolate chips.


    Perfectly complemented by a pair of "Yin & Yang " shoes




    W**F

  17. The Boy Who Wore Sausage Shoes



    Tod was a perfectly normal boy in every way. Perfectly normal that is, with one exception: where there should have been shoes on his feet, there were large sausages that had been hollowed out and allowed to dry. I don't know if you know it or not, but a dried out sausage is nearly indestructible; you can bang nails into concrete with them and they won't break or even scratch.


    Indestructible or not, Tod hated his shoes. The dogs chased him and other kids pointed and laughed in that way that only kids can point and laugh. They also tended to take on a peculiar odor during humidity of the summer. None of this made Tod happy. He just wanted to have normal shoes like everyone else.


    One day, Tod came to visit me--I'm his milk man. Don't let the title milk man fool you, however, we deliver a lot more than just milk, including eggs and cheese. Tod mentioned his shoe problem to me.


    I thought about his problem long and hard, for I was sympathetic with the boy. I'd never worn sausage shoes before, but I could relate to his problem. I decided that I would help him out.


    I'm pretty handy, so I figured I'd make him some shoes myself. You have to remember, this was back in the day and there wasn't much money to go around. I gathered some supplies and set to work. After a few hours time, I had the perfect pair of shoes made.


    The next day, while doing my route, I eventually arrived at his house. I crept up to his bedroom window and gently knocked. After a few moments, he answered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.


    I handed him a package, wrapped in brown packing paper and tied with string. He asked me what was in it. I told him to open it up, but while he was fumbling with the knot, I said he wouldn't have to wear those sausage shoes anymore. His eyes brightened and he worked harder on the knot. Eventually, he got the package open and saw my gift to him.


    Two shoes, just his size, made entirely of cheese.


    To be continued....



    W**F

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