London mayoral candidates who may not get their deposit returned

[TheArtfulDogger]

My money is on Lee Harris from the "Cannabis is safer than Alcohol" party

Only because I have the theory that his followers will be too stoned to find the ballot box

"Like man I was going to vote but I got high and posted my vote into a kebab"

Of course I could be wrong but I am sure going to hang around to watch what happens on the day and possibly enjoy the drifting smoke as people go by....

[Loz]

Of the others:

Ankit Love of the One Love Party. Potential voters will fail to find their pants on polling day. "I'm sure they were here under Rita's. Or Terry's. Or Milly's..."

Sophie Walker of the Women's Equality Party. Potential voters just thought it was Sandi Toksvig playing a practical joke. "Yeah, right, Sandy."

Prince (John) Zylinski, Polish aristocrat and anti-UKIP campaigner. Potential voters too confused to vote. "So were voting for a Polish version of Boris? But this one is for Europe?"

Paul Golding for "Britain First - Putting British people first". Potential voters all thought it was a puzzle and they had to guess which one of the candidates was the British person to put first. "Paul Golding... hmmm. Sounds American."

I see someone called David Furness is standing for the BNP. Elton John is NOT going to be happy.