Mark Owen

[Narnia]

Acid Casual Wrote:

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> Ricky Gervais was waiting in my tailors the last

> time I got a suit made. He was an utter prick.

>

> I'd made an appointment and had been a customer

> for years - since I first started earning a wage

> where you can have the odd suit made, so I was

> well known and long standing client. I strolled in

> 5 minutes before my allotted time and had my

> fitting as you do...

>

> Gervais was looking grumpy and pissed off when I

> rocked up and my arrival seemed to exacerbate his

> mood. He is extra fat and tiny with greasy hair

> and is so full of imagined self importance. As an

> aside I've met far bigger stars who have been

> usually very pleasant, but that little @#$%& seems

> to positively revel in his supposed stature.

>

> He's not a star, he happens to be famous, but the

> talent to fame ratio is a bit lop-sided in my

> opinion.

Surely -100 *BoB?

[*Bob*]

100.. well I don't know about that. A tailors..?

I mean.. I picked-up fifteen for Derren Brown in Selfridges not so long back; but only four points for Derren Brown in Selfridges, the other eleven for when he tried to hide behind a pillar as I pointed him out to Mrs *Bob*.

[legalbeagle]

Shall I give up on points for Brian Moore then?

Not my day today.

[*Bob*]

'Scuse, Legal.. it's hard to keep track of all these submissions, you know.

Who is Brian Moore again?

Remember that if he's something to do with sport, I'm only likely to have heard of him if he's done something like cheat on his wife or been caught shoplifting.

[Narnia]

Yeah, yeah, I saw him too that Brian Moore, hooker and football commentator. He cheated on their..his wife and was caught shoplifting. Points?

[*Bob*]

I have forwarded your comments on to Brian's agent to check their veracity.

[cate]

Sienna Miller and Jude Law on Regents Park Road, Primrose Hill. Was sitting at a cafe and she was tripping down the street with her two little dogs. She is tiny and very cute. Her dogs and mine touched noses so she came over and petted my dog. Jude Law hung back in a totally disinterested manner. This was before they split up after the nanny incident.

[legalbeagle]

Brian Moore was Hooker for the England rugby team and later rugby commentator. No front teeth, ears like cabbages, face like a bull dog licking p*ss off a thistle. Nice bloke though. No idea if he cheated on anyone. But I can tell you he was arguing with the ticket seller at Chancery Lane underground.

[ryedalema]

Yes, that's him...Mr. Baxter. He looks much less scary in an anorak with grey hair I can tell you. I also saw Emily Watson walking along Southbank (Shad Thames)on Tuesday looking casual but very beautiful and Anna Friel ran passed me as I went into work in December (just before my Mat. leave) and nearly got run over by the car that was presumably trying to pick her up.

Do I get points for a jay-walking Anna Friel at least?

[brum]

Jason Donovan once walked up to me and introduced himself. He was high as a kite. And dressed in stockings and suspenders. Points please!

[brum]

legalbeagle Wrote:

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> Brian Moore was Hooker for the England rugby team

> and later rugby commentator. No front teeth, ears

> like cabbages, face like a bull dog licking p*ss

> off a thistle. Nice bloke though. No idea if he

> cheated on anyone. But I can tell you he was

> arguing with the ticket seller at Chancery Lane

> underground.

This reminds me of the time I was queuing for a press pass to get into Twickenham, when the ageing gent in front of me was being refused entry by an indignant young official. Exasperated, the man turned around, asking if anyone could confirm to the official who he was. It was Phil Bennett. Welsh rugby wizard of the 70's.

[legalbeagle]

So the answer to his question would have been "No" then?!

[brum]

Actually LB, my Welsh uncle was with me and immediately vouched for this hero of Welsh rugby. And me? I didn't have a clue!

[legalbeagle]

Wotever. I want my feckin' points for Brian Moore!!!

[Note to self. Must stop being so competitive....!]

[brum]

legalbeagle Wrote:

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> Wotever. I want my feckin' points for Brian

> Moore!!!

>

Jason Donovan and Phil Bennett surely trumps a hooker?! Points please!

[legalbeagle]

Over to you *Bob*. I'm not trying to influence you or anything but I think you'll find I'm prettier than Brum.

[brum]

Well she is, there's no doubt about that *Bob*! But as a fair, reasonable person (which I am sure you are) you wouldn't let yourself be swayed by such overtly subversive tactics, would you? ;-)

[Narnia]

That is out of order LB. Which part of you is prettier? I've made a rough calculation and reckon I'm leading by 113 points!

[legalbeagle]

Yeah but you ain't actually got those points till *Bob* awards them and I still reckon some D list rugby bloke picking a fight with a London Underground employee fits the criteria set out! Now where the hell is he?!

[brum]

Narnia, to suggest a comparison of prettiness, well its true that I'm the proverbial thorn in the rose bush....

But your lead can't possibly be by 113 points. I just can't believe that! ;-)

[Narnia]

Yeah you too.........you don't write prettier! *Bob* is probably consulting with Terry Wogan as we speak....write.

[brum]

Narnia Wrote:

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> Yeah you too.........you don't write prettier!

>

...awww thanks! :-$

[woofmarkthedog]

I saw...

My "willy" ( note lower case ) in the mirror

Having thought it had previously disappeared under my sagging gut

Bullseye...

180

W**F