Flasher

[*Tee*]

Mum of 3 girlies, your not alone in being 'flashed'. I live in that very same area, and up until a couple of years back,the same guy would repeatedly 'flash' at women, in and around the area. He would wait until you got to a distance where you could see him and just show himself. I have not seen him in a while so maybe he has been put away where he can seek some medical help for his disturbing behaviour. And i qualify to comment because my sister and i were flashed by this same guy on a quiet sunday morning.It still gets me angry every time i think about it!

The first time it happened i was so stunned, i tried to laugh it off, the second and third time i saw him, I called the police right away, because i wouldnt want my children, or any one elese's children to encounter him. He was quite clearly in need of some help.

[Polly D]

Jeez, what makes someone want to flash their bits to innocent bystanders?! And what does it lead to? I grew up in the countyside in the south-east and was unwittingly exposed to (pun intended):

Man masturbating at a bus stop (I was 12), and

Man who stopped to help my friend and me with a bike puncture, took his willy out of his shorts..., we fled, and

Man on train with shorts on got his willy out.

At the time we were terrified but didn't tell our parents because we knew they wouldn't let us out again. Looking back I feel they were sad and pathetic. Okay, I understand mental health issues to some extent, but if I came across this now, near my son's nursery no less, I'd be furious. I feel for your wife peeps and hope she, and the old lady are ok.

[peeps]

Glad people found it funny - unfortunately my wife did not find a guy flashing his penis at my two daughters both under the age of 2 all that amusing.

As won't the flasher when he finds my sense of humour ........!!!!

[Penguin68]

I very much doubt whether children under 2 would be very much upset by the sight of a flasher, though they would clearly be upset if their mother appears herself upset, responding to her mood and distress. Very young chidren do not know enough about life to be worried about things they see (and they certainly wouldn't be aware of the implicit sexual aggression indicated by flashing). Psychologists anyway have argued that most people do not have memories which go back beyond the age of three (those that think they do often have memories of being told about things that happened earlier, or having seen early pictures of themselves) - it's a function of the memory re-organsing itself and (virtually) re-setting at the age of 3 or there-abouts. So I wouldn't worry about the impact of flashers on very young children - there shouldn't be any.

The standard response, by the way, by adults, of being flashed should be - "My, that looks just like a p***k - only smaller!".

[RosieH]

Just by the by, the standard response of adults to flashers should be to ignore them and walk away. And then report to the police.

As louisiana saya, flashing can lead to more serious offences. Any response you give a flasher encourages them, as that's the reason they're doing it.

[Keef]

Just want to add my sympathies, and to agree with Rosie. I will admit though, that when I saw the thread title, and the username Peeps, I did think this would be a wind up. I'm sad to hear I was wrong!

[Penguin68]

The psycho-pathology of flashing is, I suspect, somewhat complex, but may broadly be grouped into 3 areas (of which I have personal experience, as a recipient, not a participant) of the first two.

? Flashing as an act of aggression/ misplaced ?humour? ? frequently the flashers are drunk young men, and the act falls into broadly the same category as ?mooning? ? not essentially sexually motivated but a ?display? action of young adults showing their power ? may also (wrongly) be seen as a ?humorous? act (a way of showing off and making friends laugh)

? Flashing as a fetish act where the process of exposure offers some form of sexual gratification. This group (in my experience rather sad, elderly men) are quite catholic in their choice of victim ? it is their own exposure and humiliation which is the sexual trigger for them, they have made a fetish of their personal exposure. As exposure is their trigger these may well not go any further than flashing.

? Flashing where the person being flashed is the fetish object. Here the choice of victim (child, young adult, elderly person) is very careful ? and it is the person being exposed to who is the fetish object ? it is these in particular where the escalation being discussed on this thread is most likely and dangerous.

The somewhat flippant response I posted above is particularly relevant to the first of these typologies.

[louisiana]

Penguin68 Wrote:

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> Very young chidren do not know enough

> about life to be worried about things they see

> (and they certainly wouldn't be aware of the

> implicit sexual aggression indicated by flashing).

Though by the age of 5, you are certainly aware that something is wrong and that this is a form of aggression towards you (but you probably don't understand about flashers and the whole thing is bizarre and scary, particularly when accompanied by physical and verbal aggression).

My reaction was purely mine: there was nobody else around.

And as with Polly D, I didn't tell my parents; it felt at the time that *I* had done something wrong (and I had a father who was likely to explode against me). I don't think I understood at 5 that he was doing a thing that I could report in order to stop him doing it to others.

[Penguin68]

Louisiana wrote

Though by the age of 5, you are certainly aware that something is wrong

I entirely agree - it was the two year old 'victims' I was writing about - by 5 children are normally well aware when something is wrong, can certainly feel very upset and threatened by it, and are very likely to remember it, as you have done, although sometimes if sufficently traumatised (not a good thing) they may supress the memories.

I was flashed at at about that age, but I was more surprised and amused (the flasher was known about locally and was sad rather than threatening) - many of my friends had already been flashed at by him, I was quite glad I wasn't being left out. And it was at a distance (perhaps 10 yards or so) - he leaped out in front of me, flashed, then disappeared running off into bushes - so I was never close to him when he did it.

[peeps]

Brilliant thats al right then we ll have a flasher at every nursery with children under the age of 2 attending.

F****** idiots!

[louisiana]

peeps I think the poster there was maybe taking an academic perspective...

[peeps]

Louisiana I care not a jot for the armchair psychologist, news, views etc. What I do care about is the fact that there is a pervert walking the streets so thought it a good idea to warn.

In response we I get a book read synopsis from someone hiding behind a pseudonym telling me it's ok and my wife and kids should just ignore the local pervert.

Genius !

[Pearson]

Peeps,

You post this on a public forum please don't get upset by the replies.

You sound educated enough to expect a mixed response.

Flashers are not a new concept, we all have our own encounters/ memories.

You're not the only person to have been flashed.

(which is how you're coming across right now)

[louisiana]

peeps, he's on my street :-(

[sophiesofa]

Just a quick question: who do you ring if you see a flasher (not an aggresive/potential immediate risk)

I assume it would be Safer Neighbourhood Team (020 8721 2447) or East Dulwich Police (020 7378 1212) if your're in East Dulwich?

I was flashed at a few times when I was young and perhaps naively I just found it funny and never really thought about it. Which has reminded me when I was 18 at a petrol station at 5am the petrol station man was chatting to me on the forecourt and kissed me while I was filling up my car. I just pulled away and gave him my ?20 and went - it didn't even occur to me to call the police, but really that is quite disturbing and I should have told the police. I think sometime young people don't think about how a relatively minor thing such as flashing (not that flashing is OK obviously) could escalate if it's not dealt with.

[louisiana]

sophiesofa, not sure who you should call...

I do know that there are websites out there that are kind of flasher-central, where they, flashers, exchange info about tactics with women and children, and where they post photos of reactions of victims (or rather photos of the offending part in the same frame as the woman/child and his/her reaction).

Blurgh.

So people should be aware that the flasher might be trying to take that kind of photo to share with his fellow offenders.

[Pearson]

louisiana Wrote:

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> peeps, he's on my street :-(

_________________________________________________________

??

[louisiana]

Yeah, see previous posts

[Pearson]

Apologies.

[Andicam]

louisiana Wrote:

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> I do know that there are websites out there that

> are kind of flasher-central, where they, flashers,

> exchange info about tactics with women and

> children, and where they post photos of reactions

> of victims (or rather photos of the offending part

> in the same frame as the woman/child and his/her

> reaction).

That's terrible, never knew sites like this existed.

[louisiana]

Well, there's all sorts on t'interweb, eh, but I think your chances of getting something (image of you) removed from such a site is pretty much nil. So best to be aware.

[KMT]

Hey Peeps. You might be able to find the culprit on www.omegle.com and show him that sense of humour. good luck.