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No, still don't get it. I am human and humane, so would never do as you suggest. I know neither the family involved nor the disgruntled neighbours, so the chance of my having to perform a bit of doorstep lecturing is near to non existent. As said, I don't know these bereaved people (just like you, I think, given that it took you all your time to understand that something was amiss, despite the thrice-times-three days of obvious mourning right on your doorstep) so why should I picture myself in an ITV3 diorama just to accommodate your opinion of me? I don't like being told to fall in line simply because it might be seen as culturally/socially insensitive to point out that the death of a much-loved individual is not more important than the ongoing lives of scores of other people who have to endure continued late night wake-related disturbances. Perhaps I was brought up to respect the wishes of other people too much and to understand that I am not that important at all, really, even if you think the opposite of me.

Oh dear, I see I battle impossible odds. One last go. I didn't mean you should ACTUALLY do a doorstep sermon.That would be monstrous. The point of the theoretical exercise was to encourage you to consider the impact your tone would have if delivered in person to the mother who has suffered this loss. Toast makes a good point about the emboldening effect of internet anonymity. This is a public forum. A bereaved family member could read this and consider weighing of grief against the inconvenience of a week of late nights , rather ....crass. I was out of town for work when the whole process started ..but yes you are right ...I am at fault for not having twigged earlier. I don't have any excuses.

Toast I am sorry for your loss and hope you can find solace in the fact that your loved one was, in fact, loved. I hope you can celebrate their life.

Nero, you don't come across well at all.


I live on the stretch of road in question. The relatives hosting the wake were good enough to come round and knock on everyone's doors and explain what would be happening laters. They were still obviously upset by their loss, and they caused no disturbance whatsoever. I was in all night and didn't hear a peep, forgot the whole thing was happening.


I thought the fact that so many people rallied together and came round to be very positive. I hope they gave her a good send off.

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