Any eligible bachelors in East D looking for...

[checkmeout]

I am on the look out for a eligible bachelor in East D, someone around 34-40 who likes the finer things in life as well as a Guinness in a nice local pub. This is not for myself but for a very pretty/inspiring/creative friend who works in the creative industry loves music, travel, food, design, art and a million other things.

I am no Cila Black but would love to see my friend with a lovely man! I know its random that i am posting this, but i can totally understand when my single friends say that going out on the pull is the last thing they feel like doing after a long day at work. And i am sure you can too!

If you think you could be the one get intouch!

PM me x x

[Guest]

See? There aren't any. What I've been saying for ages.

[Alan Medic]

You just need to lower the bar and address 'bachelors'. Unless you define eligible who is going to put their hand up only to be shot down in flames? Bachelor is easy to understand. Bound to get a better response. BTW if you are in the market for something then perhaps you should give a sample of what you have to offer.

[Guest]

OP did define eligible and describe what's on offer, though I agree 'eligible' in the headline might put some men off - slight whiff of looking for a mealticket.

Personally I gave up looking after the last big break-up* but my own tip for single forumettes is to check the four Ss before giving the guy your number - easy enough to remember even when well under the influence. Is he:

- Sane - no obvious mental disorders or substance dependencies

- Single - surprisingly tricky for some people to be clear about

- Solvent - earns enough to support himself and pays income tax

- Straight - has finished wondering whether he might be bisexual.

I started using this in my late twenties and suddenly found myself in more sensible relationships.

*In case you wondered, he only had a 50% pass rate but I was unduly influenced by other factors.

[zeban]

I probably wouldn't bother looking in East Dulwich. With the amount of families around here I'm guessing most of the good ones have been taken. Has your friend tried internet dating? It does sometimes work. Guardian soulmates is a good one.

[checkmeout]

Great advice ladies!!! Ok maybe I need to re title the post...

Any single men available that are:

- Sane - no obvious mental disorders or substance dependencies

- Single - surprisingly tricky for some people to be clear about

- Solvent - earns enough to support himself and pays income tax

- Straight - has finished wondering whether he might be bisexual.

What do you think?

[Loz]

That pretty much describes every accountant and actuary that I have met. I bet that's not quite what you had in mind.

Why do women say this stuff, then make a beeline for the most obvious jobless, nutter bastard in the room that's trying to chat up the disinterested 17 year old barmaid?

Cynical? Moi?

[zeban]

Don't change the post. Many of those should be a given, and if a guy she meets has given her the impression that those things are them but aren't really, your friend will be savvy enough to figure that out upon meeting them.

I just wouldn't focus on one area, particularly one that's known for being a family area. And you also need to add a lot more detail about her- I mean how many women can fit her description? many I think, including myself! and you definitely need photos. I'd never respond to an ad without a photo. What are the MOST important qualities she's looking for? and she needs to be honest about this.

Have you tried my single friend dating website?

[Loz]

As Alan said, what is she bringing to the table? No one wants to be a meal ticket. (Well, Bernie Ecclestone notwithstanding).

Solvent: Is she solvent with a decent job? Does she own her own house/flat?

Sanity: Creative, arty types have been known to be a little... hmmm... you know. Mad. What is her sanity rating?

Single: Taken as read, given this thread.

Straight: Ditto.

Also, girls have been known to describe friends as 'pretty' rather easily. I've known girls to describe friends as 'pretty' when 'south side of a north-bound camel' would have been more appropriate. I suppose a photo is out of the question, but what famous person would you compare her to?

(Not that I am interested - I am already taken.)

[????]

Loz Wrote:

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> That pretty much describes every accountant and

> actuary that I have met. I bet that's not quite

> what you had in mind.

>

> Why do women say this stuff, then make a beeline

> for the most obvious jobless, nutter bastard in

> the room that's trying to chat up the

> disinterested 17 year old barmaid?

>

> Cynical? Moi?

I'm with you Loz. It never ceases to amaze me how soooooo often seemingly sensible woman go on and on about how they'd be happy with a nice, empathetic, reasonably good looking guy with a sense of humour .....and then leave the pub/party/club with the dark eyed, completley obvious bastard/playa.......oh, they kid themselves

[zeban]

Yes I agree Loz, being 'pretty' described by another is no way enough info about what she can bring to the table. what is she offering?- emotional support/friendship/adventure ETC. Is she looking for some no strings attached dates/or long term relationship/ or marriage/, does she want children etc.

IMO no guy who was looking for something serious which I'm assuming your friend wants, would respond to this ad without more info. I don't think someones job/industry is important when it comes down to it. Hobbies/interests aren't either. More important are priorities in life, political and religious views, character traits.

[RosieH]

and then leave the pub/party/club with the dark eyed, completley obvious bastard/playa.......oh, they kid themselves

No no no, we're not kidding ourselves: in those circumstances we think we're going to get all the fun and the deviant sex.

It seldom, if ever, turns out to be true.

[StraferJack]

If it seldom, if ever, turns out to be true then it would seem you are the definition of kidding yourselves

[RosieH]

Well ok Mr Pedantic, in that regard we are.

Just not in thinking that Captain Jack Sparrow is going to be our partner for life.

[????]

But if you keep going off with the Jack Sparrows you'll nerver meet your Master Bates....that's the point

[RosieH]

True say - where's Prince Caspian when you need him?

[Alan Medic]

Why don't you say that it's you and not your 'friend'. Are you being truthful or are you telling a porky already?

[huncamunca]

The way forward is to be a scowly miserabilist wanker

http://www.good.is/post/women-find-happy-men-less-attractive-than-grumps/

?In a survey of 1,000 adults, women generally preferred men who looked strong and proud, arms raised into the sky, or sullen and ashamed?in that order. Happy men were rated the least attractive. Interestingly, when it came to male preferences, things were reversed: Men rated happy women the most attractive and proud, strong women least attractive.?

[zeban]

Huncamunca, that article is talking about body language, NOT character. The artciale states: 'women find happy men?in this study, men who were smiling in photos ?significantly less attractive than men portraying other emotions.'

It goes onto say: 'None of this is to say that women want to marry pissed-off jerks. ?We were not asking participants if they thought these targets would make a good boyfriend or wife,? said Alec Beall, a member of the UBC research team. If they had asked that, it?s likely they wouldn't have gotten the same gut reactions. '

[Guest]

According to Raj Persaud what really matters in a potential partner (male or female) is their willingness to stick around and support you in a crisis. The problem with this is that when people fall in love they tend to be healthy, relatively happy, screening out their negative attributes and frequently pissed. Maybe the OP's friend should throw a small crisis, see which of her single male friends/colleagues rallies round and take it from there.

[LadyDeliah]

Well personally, I want a man who can be a gent on my arm, a beast in the bedroom and a chef in the kitchen, lol. Don't we all??

[zeban]

Definitely LadyDeliah!

[RosieH]

Tom Aikens?

[LadyDeliah]

Hmmn, yes, he'd do nicely!

[Mick Mac]

RosieH Wrote:

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> Tom Aikens?

You have been beasted in the bedroom by Tom Aikens?