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I was up at 4:30am, Little Saff stubbornly refusing a bottle of warm milk and tearfully requesting booby as if her world would end without it. Grumpy Mr Saff said he didn't want her in bed with us, so it was a lonely half hour in the rocker in the nursery for me. Mr Saff said he'd take her straight away when she was up for the day. But at 6am when she was up again, he reneged! Decided he was too tired from the long drive home from Sussex (humph) the day before. So he dumped her in bed with us and let her bounce (literally) on my head for an hour before he finally got up and made her breakfast. Not his most shining hour, eh?


But we'll all be up for a lot more sleepless nights if the haematologist decides my high platelet count needs hydroxycarbamide treatment. That will mean no more b/fing, no more easy back to sleep for Little Saff. Then what will I do? Hump a 30 lb toddler plus buggy down the stairs at 4:30am for endless laps around the block??? You must be joking.

Little Saff at it again last night: Up at 3:30am. Didn't even make it to the rocker this time, fell asleep until 5:30 with her in her junior bed (not *quite* long enough for an adult-- who invented this torturous device???). So obviously Mr Saff's plan last year that putting her in her own bed would make her sleep through the night has proved utter failure. I think we may have to swap her cotbed for a fouton matress on the floor, so I can sleep with her all night. Then at least when she wakes up, I would only have to turn over instead of out of bed, down the hall, and round the corner (the longest 10 metres in the world!).


F- Haem is Lewisham U Hospital: Waited 2 h to see a junior consultant for 5 min last appointment. Arrrggh. I'll surely be old and grey by the time they decide I need definitive treatment, so hopefully Little Saff will be off the boob by then. Ha.

You're not close enough to get seen by Kings haematology? I love Dr Arya and Dr Patel, the consultants there, in fact the whole dept is lovely, and I say that as a hospital phobic.


If I were you i would get a futon and just move in with her. But start adding some other sleep cues (lullaby on your phone, blankie, phrase like "roll over, snuggle down" and doing the pantley pull off with a view to night weaning.. make it less traumatic if you have to stop bf


xx


PS You can still start the night in the big bed with your partner!

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