Best way to deal with a scrap metal "merchant"...

[MrBen]

Do I:

A) Have him come round my house on a decent street, stand there in my chinos and say "My good man! How much will you give me for this steel bath, random copper piping, 5 radiators and old zinc riveted water tank?"

OR

B hire a transit, load it in the back and turn up in Nunhead in a paint splattered boiler suit demanding the going rate.

Your kind advice appreciated....;-)

Edit to remove random cool smilies

[????]

Arrrrrrrrrr.......Mr Ben's Middle Class Homeowner's Dilemma's Number 7 - Coming next "Explaining that I can put a shelf up but haven't the appropriate tools"

[Loz]

Surely hiring a transit will negate any profit?

[*Bob*]

Things you will need: roll-up cigarette, open can of Stella

Things you won't need: a wash, aitches

Good luck.

[maxxi]

Forget the van - AND the boiler suit (this isn't an Ealing comedy) - put on paint splattered tracksuit bottoms and a check shirt and have him call at the house which you are 'doin'-up on the cheap for the geezer wot lives there' so need every penny you can get.

Check prices on-line first and look permanently perturbed as you stare at your Sun crossword while he goes over the items. Practice sucking air through your teeth and slowly shaking your head and when he names a price you can live with shake head even slower and say (pointing to any other rubble you need disposing of) 'go on then - take this sh*t an' all an' we got a deal'.

When money changes hands drop act and say "Thanks awfully old man" and beam.

ETA: Yes, for the purposes of the last act we ARE in an Ealing comedy and you are Ian Carmichael.