Jump to content

Jokes

tedfudge

By tedfudge
in The Lounge

 Share

Recommended Posts

malumbu

malumbu

Posted
Posted

Talking rabbit goes into a bar and orders a drink and asks about food. We have cheese toaties, ham toasties, and ham and cheese toasties. Lovely replies the rabbit. I'll have a cheese toatie.


Next day the rabbit goes in and orders a ham toastie.


And the day after a ham and cheese toastie.


A few weeks later, the rabbit has not returned. Anyone know what happened to that talking rabbit asks the barman/lady? A local replies that sadly the rabbit has died.


Oh that's a shame says the barman, of what?


"Mixin m' toasties"


Worth a long build up and practicing the punchline

Alan Medic

Alan Medic

Posted
Posted

Five surgeons are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon, from Belfast City Hospital, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second, from Antrim Area Hospital, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is co lour coded."

The third surgeon, from Royal Belfast Hospital , says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon, from Musgrave Park Hospital "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.'

But the fifth surgeon, from Ulster Hospital, Dundonald , shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Tory Politicians are the easiest to operate on.

There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.’

Spartacus

Spartacus

Posted
Posted

A Farmer went out in the snow one morning, to tend to his cows and found them all frozen.

A woman was passing by

she breathed on them and each one defrosted.

The farmer said to her, “Are you an Angel sent from heaven?”


“No”, said the woman,

“I’m Thora Hird!”

teddyboy23

teddyboy23

Posted
Posted (edited)
A. Bear and a rabbit side by side in the forest, doing a number 2 . bear turns to the rabbit and saids when your done does the number 2 stick to your fur.rabbit saids no.so the bear picked the rabbit up and wiped his arse with him . Edited by teddyboy23

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing
  • Advertise Here

  • Latest Discussions

    • JessicaCT
      Plumber recommendation – Mark at Pure Plumbers

      By JessicaCT · Posted

      A shout out for Mark, owner of Pure Plumbers. 07970 971510 They're well established in the Sevenoaks area, but have recently started doing more work in SE London.  Did some v quick and efficient bathroom and boiler fixes for me; have also seen some of the bathrooms he's built, which have a nice attention to detail. Jessica    
    • beansprout
      New Empanada Place on LL

      By beansprout · Posted

      Totally agree regarding not supporting chains. Gail’s was fine but last time I went in Feb this year, actually walked out Fayetteville looking at menu and waiting 15 minutes to even get glass of water and not busy at all. Staff gone down hill - sooner it goes the better… Always prefer to support non chains - so many lovely places with good food to choose from with pleasant staff who know about customer service and sadly, non English which says a lot for our culture, pubs are also becoming abit of a hit and miss affair but maybe just unlucky. At the end of the day all about the chef. Still abit unclear where new place is located - is it down the road from Goose Green where parade of shops are before Peckham Rye?  
    • Penguin68
      New Empanada Place on LL

      By Penguin68 · Posted

      Surely only where the local businesses offer clear advantages, otherwise you are rewarding what should be failure. I want to be served by a better bakery than Gail's, not a worse but local independent one. Certainly give a local independent some time to get the offer right, but don't buy goods which are worse and or more expensive just because the outlet isn't a chain. 
    • Angelina
      New Empanada Place on LL

      By Angelina · Posted

      Let’s just boycott all chains in favour of local businesses.  Places like Gail’s popping up everywhere has a very damaging impact on small businesses. It’s just the same as the new empanadas place but on a bigger scale. I’ll say it a million times more, we hold the power with our choices. Let’s use our power to look after ourselves and our environment (which includes small local family businesses). And yes, I also love Chacarero.

East Dulwich Forum

Established in 2006, we are an online community discussion forum for people who live, work in and visit SE22.

Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...