Jump to content

Jokes

tedfudge

By tedfudge
in The Lounge

 Share

Recommended Posts

malumbu

malumbu

Posted
Posted

Talking rabbit goes into a bar and orders a drink and asks about food. We have cheese toaties, ham toasties, and ham and cheese toasties. Lovely replies the rabbit. I'll have a cheese toatie.


Next day the rabbit goes in and orders a ham toastie.


And the day after a ham and cheese toastie.


A few weeks later, the rabbit has not returned. Anyone know what happened to that talking rabbit asks the barman/lady? A local replies that sadly the rabbit has died.


Oh that's a shame says the barman, of what?


"Mixin m' toasties"


Worth a long build up and practicing the punchline

Alan Medic

Alan Medic

Posted
Posted

Five surgeons are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon, from Belfast City Hospital, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second, from Antrim Area Hospital, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is co lour coded."

The third surgeon, from Royal Belfast Hospital , says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon, from Musgrave Park Hospital "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.'

But the fifth surgeon, from Ulster Hospital, Dundonald , shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Tory Politicians are the easiest to operate on.

There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.’

Spartacus

Spartacus

Posted
Posted

A Farmer went out in the snow one morning, to tend to his cows and found them all frozen.

A woman was passing by

she breathed on them and each one defrosted.

The farmer said to her, “Are you an Angel sent from heaven?”


“No”, said the woman,

“I’m Thora Hird!”

teddyboy23

teddyboy23

Posted
Posted (edited)
A. Bear and a rabbit side by side in the forest, doing a number 2 . bear turns to the rabbit and saids when your done does the number 2 stick to your fur.rabbit saids no.so the bear picked the rabbit up and wiped his arse with him . Edited by teddyboy23

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing
  • Advertise Here

  • Latest Discussions

    • first mate
      GALA 2025

      By first mate · Posted

      Yes, but most posting on here against the festival have not said they hate all festivals, it is about location, scale and footprint, duration of the event, including build and dismantling, and the level of impact on wildlife and residents living close by.    Last year I said on here that I would, reluctantly, accept the three day event, provided it was no more than that and the footprint was not extended to include more of the park. Now it is reasonably clear there is an intention to scale up I think a new, more suitable location must be found. 
    • Angelina
      GALA 2025

      By Angelina · Posted

      Have to admit, I did have to check myself - I've been to many festivals and it seems a bit contradictory to challenge one, but our local park is not the place for a festival of this size. It just needs to either scale down to the environment (smaller footprint, less damage) or find a better location. There is a VAST difference between festivals out in the countryside and the same in an urban park.      
    • Bob Buzzard
      Annual building work

      By Bob Buzzard · Posted

      Campfire on from about 7pm on Fridays - pop along and join me - I always have some Small Beer available. 
    • pikeyed
      Book donation suggestion

      By pikeyed · Posted

      Thanks. I dropped off the books that I thought would be most helpful for them already this week.  Thanks for the advice. I have advertised the ones that may be of use for studies on this forum then dropped off some at Oxfam in Herne Hill and others at the Bell End House book exchange. Still a few more to drop which I will likely give to Mind on LL who I like.

East Dulwich Forum

Established in 2006, we are an online community discussion forum for people who live, work in and visit SE22.

Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...