8 month old screams when Daddy tries to put him to bed

[Jayyfa]

Hi there,

Wondering if anyone can offer any words of wisdom.

Exclusively breastfed baby, now eating three meals a day with 4 breastfeeds, really happy during the day, screams... and I mean is ABSOLUTELY DISTRAUGHT (red, hot, sweating, screaming) whenever my husband tries to put him to bed.

I normally do it during the week and can (just about) get him to go to sleep in cot on his own. But for some reason, he just will not let my husband do it even though he can soothe him during the night.

He gets so upset that I have to step in and breastfeed him to sleep which I need to stop doing at that time. It's starting to affect me being able to put him down to sleep effectively too because as soon as he realises it's bedtime now he starts wailing.

Help!

Any ideas appreciated (apart from cry it out which I can't do)

Thanks!

Jenni

[Redmeghan]

Our daughter was tricky too - I breast fed her to sleep for far too long and wish I'd stopped sooner. We waited until I could consistently get her to sleep without boob (but by staying in the room for a good 45 min) and then my husband joined me and we did it together and then he did it alone. I found it easiest to leave the house on his guts though - we've never let her cry it out either and I just can't bear hearing her wail. Also if you keep stepping in then your child will learn that that's what happens... Try going out for a movie. Your child is in the safest of hands and won't feel abandoned as long as he stays in the room - they need to figure this out together... But I'd definitely recommend waiting until you've got a hang of it first.

And maybe your baby just isn't ready? Our girl had a breakthrough at one year - sun deny sleeping through the night and falling asleep fairly happily without much fuss. She's now 19 months and can spend twenty minutes chatting herself to sleep alone in her room. I think the main thing is to make them feel safe and cared for... And Daddy can do that too!

Good luck! Stay strong and have faith that when your baby is ready it will get much easier!

M

[Jayyfa]

Thanks so much for this! I will try this phased approach...I really appreciate you taking the time to write, thank you - I feel a lot better just reading this!

J