Dummies!!!

[ryedalema]

Oh where to start...my 2 yr 4 month year old daughter still has a dummie and we need advice on how to get rid of it. We used it originally as it was the only way she'd accept medicine (one of those hollow ones) and teething gel - and now she's addicted. She doesn't use it at nursery, or while we are out, but demands it at home, during car journeys and while sleeping. She's got a lot of change that she's going through at the moment. We changed nurseries last month and on her third day there she broke her arm (she's still in a cast for two more weeks)in an accident at home. And she's got a little sister coming anytime now (in the next four to six weeks anyway). Her back molars are also coming through and she's chewing the life out of the d*mned things, piercing them with her teeth - then handing them back saying 'it's broken'. We were thinking that perhaps Father Christmas could exchange them for presents - but is this too much change to go through? We're also trying to potty train her but taking that one quite slowly/calmly so as not to traumatise Madam during this period of upheaval.

All help gratefully received!!!!!!!!!!!

[helena handbasket]

With everything going on in her little world, now is not the time to worry about it I don't think. We've battled with it with our son on and off for three years now, and as much as I would like to see it gone I realize that it is really important to him. He very is gradually using it less and less, and friends who have been through it tell me that they just eventually don't want it anymore. LOADS of people have negative opinions about it, and yes you have to keep a close eye on tooth formation, but I have decided to not worry too much about it. I ignore the nasty looks and comments........ I simply don't care about that. Besides, you really have your hands full right now!

There are some cute books out there, not that they helped us. I do find that putting it out of sight for long periods of time helps.

[sillywoman]

I remember going through this with a little boys I was Nanny to many years ago. His Mum had the clever idea that the dummy's were all kept in the same place, namely a glove puppet monkey in his cot bed. When he wanted one he had to go to his bed and have it there, it worked on a number of levels.

He tended to want them more when he was tired anyway, so that meant he was in the best place for a tired boy, and when the he was just mildly wingeing for them, then generally he decided the effort required to go to his bed to get them wasn't worth the hassle, and gradually demand dropped off. Of course this was all kept very flexible and if he hurt himself or really needed the comfort than a dummy could be bought out of the bedroom as a special occasion. She wisely didn't instigate it until a good few months after his baby brother was born though. As HH says - there's such a lot going on in your little girls world, it's probably better to wait until things settle before you instigate any changes.

Also, just a thought, could the 'broken' ones be gradually disappeared, & just not be replaced so she's left with a limited amount? Am thinking over a period of some months here?

[Sanne Panne]

Right now may not be the ideal moment to go cold turkey but you could limit it to using it for sleeping - so in her cot and in the car when she's meant to sleep. We did it with our daughter who was quite an addict and it seems to work well. Whenever I pick her up from her cot in the morning I tell her to throw the dummy back into the cot - I turn it into a little ritual and she seems to think it's fun to throw it in now. If she tries to hold onto it I say "noooo, the dummy belongs in bed". If she ever asks for it during the day or if she finds one on the floor somewhere I say "naaah, you don't need the dummy now, the dummy is for bedtime right?". Somehow it works, she seems to have accepted it.

A dummy is nice for that sense of security when a lot is going on, and that sense of security is important for bedtime I think. If she stops using it during the day you won't need to worry about it interfering with her talking and it'll probably not have a real effect on her teeth either. I haven't even set myself a target age to get rid of the dummy for bedtime... don't see any harm in it at all.

[sabibi]

Hello,

Father Xmas is a gread idea!!! Did it last year with my daughter who was 2 1/2 then - she was really attached to her dummy but told her about 2 weeks before that as she now was a big girl if she wanted Father Xmas to bring her presents she would need to give her dummy before that.

It did help that there was an upcoming event where I knew the Father Xmas who would be there and thus we could give him our little package...I only talked to her about 2 weeks before and she gave the dummy away... straight after in the car she did ask me for her dummy.. but I told her we now had given hit to Santa as she was a big girl so that she would get her presents and she was fine.

Planning on doing that with my other daughter next Xmas...

Good luck with it!

[helena handbasket]

We're going to do that too. Just a bit worried that he will think of Father Christmas as that mean man who steals important things from small children :)

We tried to do it with his birthday (Birthday Fairy) but realized he was starting to dread his birthday so we decided it wasn't worth it.

Good luck!