civilservant

I haven't read the book - and probably won't - but must admit to actually liking the Oliver James column in the Guardian. Yes, it's preachy and so on, but has some basis in proper research and his general attitude is baby-centred after all. (I speak as one of those careless mums who blithely dumped her baby in daycare at 6 months old and went off to work full-time. Well, hey for the capitalist system!) But the baby 'guru' who made me see red, after first depressing the hell out of me because a) I clearly was a rubbish mum because I wasn't up to following her minutely calibrated routines, and b) I clearly had a rubbish baby, who just wouldn't do as she prescribed, was Gina Ford. That book went in the bin, as I didn't want to risk any other new mum picking it up in a charity shop. Still depresses me to see that there are those who will slavishly praise and force copies of her onto their innocent pregnant sisters. At least O James, although a mister, has kids of his own.

The key issues are exactly the ones you mention - the commute and the job stress. I carried on working until I had a week to go - and then the baby was a week late, so I had two weeks of being massively(!) bored - but I was lucky because I had an easy bus journey to an air-conditioned office where I mostly sat in front of a computer. If you're on your feet a lot at work and have a massive commute, then you do need to think about how to make it easier on yourself when you get into your third trimester. If you've got any women colleagues who've recently been pregnant, I'd recommend talking to them about tactics for negotiating the last few weeks if you do decide to take it up to the wire. TfL have wised up somewhat and done a little bit to make public transport more pregnancy-friendly with better signage and the Baby on Board badges - see http://www.tfl.gov.uk/corporate/media/newscentre/archive/3665.aspx. But if that doesn't work, after a while you'll discover that you've overcome the inhibitions that might have prevented you from asking non-pregnant people for a seat! Whatever you decide, the best of good luck:))

This post is probably not going to make me very popular on this forum, but it does seem that the older your child is, the harder it is for him or her to settle into nursery. I once discussed this with my daughter's nursery manager - a woman with 20 years' experience - who confirmed that in her experience babies found it a lot less traumatic to start nursery at 6 months old than at 12 months or older. And the more regular the routine, the easier it is for them to understand - so paradoxically, nursery every day is probably better than split days, or odd days, or any irregular arrangement.

sb - on our GP's advice, we tried not bathing the baby - outcome: the baby's skin worsened; when she finally saw the dermatologist, she was 95% covered with eczematous rash (dermatologist's estimate). Clearly, it varies according to the individual case. We too use Oilatum, nothing else. For what it's worth, I find the whole 'pampering' industry with is smelly lotions and potions rather distasteful. buggie -

buggie, you may be right, but see also http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8055038.stm

I agree with all other posts that recommend a dermatologist. Six years ago, our daughter developed eczema all over at 2 months old and GPs were useless - prescribed a variety of emollients, none of which helped, but were very reluctant to refer her on to a dermatologist. We finally self-referred when she was 4 months old to a dermatologist at Great Ormond Street, who put us on a regime of Oilatum baths twice daily - yes, twice daily! - Diprobase and steroid cream, also twice daily, just to bring the inflammation down and restore her skin to a reasonably normal state. Some other things he said - the main reason for using steroids is because the priority is to reduce the inflammation, and food allergies are rarely the primary cause, it's more likely to be genetic. He was furious with the GPs for their neglect and pussy-footing around the need to use steroids. My daughter's skin is much better now, but we've had to accept that twice-daily Diprobase, daily Oilatum baths and occasional use of steroid creams will be part of our lives for ever... On the other hand, my niece - whose eczema her parents decided to treat with emollients only - has some scarring on the backs of her knees and crooks of elbows as a result of scratching, impetigo etc. She also has mild asthma - I've seen recent research that claims that untreated eczema can result in an increased asthma risk. I do hope that your baby gets better - it's very distressing to see them look so itchy and uncomfortable, not to mention the risk of infection and loss of sleep. Good luck!

I continue my quest for the elusive East Dulwich hedgehog. The Royal Mail have just issued some lovely stamps showing threatened mammals - see http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/gallery/2010/apr/13/royal-mail-stamps-uk-mammals - and guess which animal features on the first stamp in the series! In keepign with the threatened mammal theme, local hedgehog news is not good. This is what I got from Hugh Warwick, a hedgehog expert at the BHPS (British Hedgehog Preservation Society to the un-initiated - he's also got a great book on hedgehogs out for those who might be interested) "By the 2000s hogs appeared to have been lost from around 45% of sites where they were present in 1960-80 - the map shows S and SE london to be badly lacking in hogs. The distance from St Pauls Cathedral was a very significant indicator of likelihood of hogs - closer you are the fewer. Habitat fragmentation is likely to be the cause of your absence of hogs - great parks are fine as long as they are connected to a supply of hedgehogs! It is not just roads that are the problem but the loss of gardens and green space connecting up the landscape. So every extension, car park on front garden, decking, patio - all affect hedgehogs' chances of coping. Your garden sounds like it would be prime hog habitat, but if there are no hogs in the area, all I can suggest is to keep an eye out for signs of hedgehog - dead ones on the road are actually quite encouraging as they tell you that there are some around ..." We're not doing so well - do keep any sightings coming!

Enjoy your squirrels while you can - we used to have a thriving population in our garden. Of course we didn't appreciate them and moaned about how they trashed our bulbs etc. Then someone nearby got a cat, who proceeded to eliminate the baby squirrels with extreme prejudice. The crying of the wounded babies was heart-rending - I expect they crawled away somewhere and died of their wounds. This was a couple of years ago. Only the bravest of squirrels ventures into our garden now because those bloody cats have made it their own. So no hedgehogs, and no squirrels, but no end of cats... is this the green and pleasant East Dulwich everyone else is blathering on about?

Has anyone seen any hedgehogs in East Dulwich? I haven't seen a single one, alive or squashed, since moving here four years ago.