Saffron

I was wondering about that as well. This seems to say donkey rides are still available: http://www.royalgreenwich.gov.uk/directory_record/3758/blackheath .

Agreed, gillandjoe, swings and roundabouts. It's totally subjective on many points. Two sides to every story,'n' all that... My daughter is an only child, and her childhood is definitely not sensible and controlled or quiet. And she will definitely not be forced into excessive self-reliance. I have two siblings, and I'm dreading being forced to interact with them when our parents die. Not that I think there's anything wrong with having siblings, but -- paraphrasing gillandjoe -- on balance singltons are not worse off than siblings and vice versa. Yup I have worries about my daughter too, What if she doesn't like me?, or worse, What if she dies? Well, you could have 2 or 3 or 4 kids etc, and they could all hate you, or all die, or any number of horrible scenarios. There is an element of faith in the future, and also an element of acceptance of the present maybe. Our decisions are coloured by our experiences, and the outcomes are augmented by our awareness and our ability to adapt. xx

WorkingMummy Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Well, that's all reassuring and familiar. I want > to make you dead is still a shock though. > > I have found an interesting website that > recommends play wrestling with your child as a way > to connect with a "spirited" child. I tried it > this evening. It was amazing! She hit me a lot at > bath time and I put her in her room so that I > could care for her siblings without having to cope > with her violence. But when I was able to let her > out again, instead of lecturing her, I got on the > floor and said, in a fun way, "you want to hit me? > come on then!" The result was immediate > transformation from conflict and screaming (by her > that is, not me) to fun and laughter (for us > both). I'll do that again. I sometimes use this kind of "channelling" with my friend's little boy who is very spiritied. He likes to throw things and has hit both me and my daughter in the face with hard toys, despite actually being a lovely little boy. He gets very angry and frustrated when he's not allowed to throw anything (he's 3+ yrs). So instead of working against the behaviour, I work with it. We put away all the hard toys and only play with plush teddies. We make a game out of trying to score goals in the laundry basket. It gets a great response, very happy little boy. Do you have a link for the website with play wrestling info? I'd love to read it! xx

Second vote for Baby Sensory!!

Many years ago, I used to teach novice riding classes and lead hacks, and the youngest we could take was 4 years old for lessons or 5 years old for hacks. This was due to insurance. The stable had no ponies. All cildren started on horses. It's a common misconception that children need to start on ponies. Many ponies indeed are stubborn foul-tempered little creatures (you probably would be too if children bounced around on your back all day!). A calm, well-schooled horse is just fine, even for young novice riders. Happy hacking! xx

Walking home one evening with our ~3 year old, she was wailing at the top of her lungs, "I hate my parents!" It's an emotional short circuit. Agreed, best to ignore. You can talk about it later when your LO has calmed down. Very frustrating at the time, though! xx

IPL treatment, or if you can afford it, Pixel laser. I've been here: http://www.theprivateclinic.co.uk/ . Ok the treatments are not cheap, but when I looked at what I was spending every month on skin products, I had to consider this as an investment. I had IPL for acne about 10 yrs ago, and Pixel laser treatment about 4.5 yrs ago for resurfacing. I spent many of my early years living at a low latitude, and my very fair skin was starting show the damage. Pixel can reach deeply enough into the skin to correct this at a cellular level, not just cosmetic. However, Pixel is very expensive. IPL is cheaper, and I thought it was more effective at correcting acne. If your problem is large pores (which is not really acne), then Pixel might be better. More recently, I've had glycolic facials. Lots of places offer these locally. My friend does them for us at cost when we have a girls night at mine. The effect is nice but doesn't reach so deep into the skin. Although the cost is certainly much less than IPL or laser treatment.

:)

Yup, I thought that was funny too! As you say, there isn't a right or wrong answer. So ultimately we are often guided by our own experiences.

GinaG3, you might know about these already, but for anyone in a similar siuation here are two excellent resources if gynae problems are an issue when considering a second (or 3rd, or 4th...) pregnancy: http://www.thevbook.com/ http://www.hystersisters.com/ -- Search the Resource page of this site for alternatives to hysterectomy. Ultimately you might still need a hysterectomy, but this might buy you some time. xx

It takes a real awareness as a parent to recognise that one child is causing a problem for others. The answer is not just to brush it off as kids-will-be-kids type thing, as I see so many parents do. If you have an awareness of sibling issues, then perhaps you can better prepare yourself to make strenuous early interventions. It takes an investment of time and money, but also energy. Of these three, I personally find the energy committment most daunting.

So, are people mainly interested in fasting diets for weightloss? Is the book mainly about weightloss? The Horizen program also stressed a lot of other health benefits, even for people in a normal weight range. That was what most intrigued me about calorie restricted diets, particularly the cellular switch from "building" to "repair" mode. I'm in a normal weight range already but would be interested in this diet type for its possible longterm health benefits. However, I feel slightly concerned about getting enough minerals, particularly iron and calcium. What does the book say about it?

I have siblings, and we don't get along, sadly even as adults. The endless bickering, manipulations and abusive behaviours from my brothers (one brother in particular) have been very destructive to our family. I don't want that experience for my own child, so we only have one child. So it's not just about wanting another baby, it's about considering how those children will relate to each other when they are older, and what you as parents will be capable of doing should there be profound behavioural problems among the siblings. My parents were totally unprepared for this. They tried to help my brother with his problems, but they totally failed to protect me and my other sibling from his destructive behaviours directed at us. So you could just as easily be asking - will you be regretting the children you did have? It really is a decision each family will have to consider for themselves, possibly for each pregnancy. For me and Mr Saff personally, there are also a financial issues and my age to consider. If we had lots of money and had got started with a family much younger, maybe it would have been different. If we'd even consider a second child, we'd need a 7-10 year age gap. By then we might be in a better position financially, but I'd be in my forties. While a baby at 43 sounds doable, a teenager at 60 does not sound like my cuppa. Then again, sometimes nature has other ideas... if we had an accidental pregnancy, I would keep it. I have an IUD, so that's not a scenario we're likely to face (thankfully). xx

snowboarder Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Freakin' scales. I've just discovered they weigh > differently depending on where in the bathroom I > put them. I now seem to have put on 2kg just > because of that!! You'll get the most reliable result on a hard, even surface. Putting your weigh-scale on carpet or any soft or uneven surface usually makes the scales read low (ie tells you that you weigh less than you do). Changing rooms at a place where I worked many years ago had a large set of mirrors, one of which was slightly warped. It made you look thinner than you are. Oh how we all loved standing in front of that mirror, even though we knew it wasn't real. xx

I saw the BBC 2 (Horizon?) progam on intermittent fasting a while back. It was very interesting. I thought the 5:2 scenario looked really workable.

I second what hellosailor said! Great blog!! I need a children's birthday cake (that people will actually enjoy eating, not one of those sickly marzipan things that even the kids won't eat) for Sunday, and I'm in such a post-holiday frazzle that I haven't made any preparations at all. I would probably be a rubbish partner for fasting, but I'd happily buy your cakes!!! xx

If you're taking calcium there are two things to know. Calcium works vitamin D and against iron. Taking vitamin D with calcium helps absorption, so you often find them together in supplements. However, if your iron is also low, take your iron supplement separately from calcium with a 2-4 hour gap inbetween. Calcium and iron are both "2+" ions, so they compete with eachother for absorption. If you feel very, very tired, and/or you lost some blood during labour, it's worth asking your GP to do some general bloodwork. People tend to think of low calcium being associated with breastfeeding, but iron stores are often depleted by pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding. And the body's iron stores can take a long time to build back up to pre-pregnancy levels. When taking iron supplements, avoid digestive upset by also taking it with vitamin C. In the past I've taken Floradix, and I have a friend who likes SpaTone. However, my iron was so low, the haematologist said don't bother because they don't have enough iron to correct severe iron depletion. Instead I had a prescription for ferrous sulphate tablets.

I sometimes think it's one of the sad things about city living, that we can become removed from natural cycles such as life and death. My grandparents had a farm, so for my mother the idea of death was always a very matter of fact part of life. As a child, I was instilled with that, and also a Christian view of God in Heaven. Even from an early age, I found the matter of fact approach made more sense and did not like the vague (as I saw it) ideas of God/Heaven. Little Saff had a very literal introduction to the concept of death around age 2, when our large and much-loved sucker fish died. When I saw the fish dead in the tank, I was so upset that I phoned Mr Saff at work and blubbed down the line, "Suzy Suckerfish died!!!!" This sparked off a series interesting conversations about what happens when something dies and where it goes physically. I took the literal approach, eg things that are dead don't eat or breath or move or feel etc. (If people tell her differently, I always try to offer gentle correction, eg dead people are not really sleeping.) I told her it's ok to feel sad, but that we can also be happy when we remember how beautiful Suzy Suckerfish was. We always concluded our conversations by me saying that Suzy Suckerfish "returned to the earth from whence she came" and that now she is once again part of everything. (Ashes to ashes, the only Christian bit that ever made any sense to me as a child.) Mr Saff and I are not religious, so I try never to mix religion with life/death issues (possibly also because I found this confusing as a child). But we do talk about other people's religious beliefs. I try to be literal about this too. I tell her that different people believe things because they are comforted by those beliefs, but that no one really knows. I pitch her philosophical answers about faith and religion just slightly out of her depth and let her ponder them. She likes this. BUT- There's an important distinction to make about children understanding the life-death cycle, vs children who are actively grieving. If we lost a close friend or family member, I think I would seek some additional advice about grief support/counselling for children. The understanding of death and the process of grieving are two distinct things, even though they are related. In any event, no matter what I do, one day Little Saff will probably tell her own child that I gave her all kinds of "crazy" beliefs about death or religion. Sigh. As parents, we can only do what we can do. xx

Oh dear, maybe I'm really soft, but I thought it would be a lot more! I remember as a child being really disappointed that the tooth fairy had only left me a very anticlimactic 20p. I think I would have rather kept my tooth. My boss has an interesting solution. Apparently his tooth fairy has an EU contract and leaves only Euros!

etta166 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I never said I thought that it was irresponsible. > I just can't see the difference between travelling > in the week before the rash appears or travelling > once the rash is there. Either way, you're > choosing to put other people at risk. You just > need to decide if you're willing to do that. I wasn't implying as such. I was saying two separate things. Those two things being: (a) that I agree with what you say about spreading the rash before the spots appear. And (b) I that (separately) (personally) think it's irresponsible to travel knowing that oneself or child could carry the infection. . . . And as long as I'm clarifying, just let me also add that I'm categorically not saying that the OP is irresponsible. Nor am I saying the world ends because anyone makes less than responsible decsions. Like with so many things in parenting (and life), it's a sliding scale. But if people want to make really informed decisions, then the best they can do is review the facts for themselves. xx

No, your travel insurance would not necessarily cover that. And I agree with etta166. It's irresponsible knowingly to travel with a child that has been directly exposed to chickenpox virus. Children are not exposed all the time just because the virus is perennial. Exposure comes in acute waves. If you know that your child has been directly exposed to other infected children during an outbreak, then there is a 90% chance that your child will also develop chickenpox. If you really cannot put off your travel, at the least you should have your child immunised immediately following exposure. Please bear in mind that not all people with reduced immunity are travelling for leisure, and therefore their travel is essential despite the risks. The public could greatly reduce that risk by not spreading infections. Or put it another way. How would people feel if a person who knew s/he had been exposed to e.g. SARS, then got on a plane/train with one of your elderly relatives who subsequently fell profoundly ill? Just food for thought. xx

If you haven't spoken to someone already, I would take her to the A&E today.

I used to live/work in Basel, Switzerland. You wouldn't think of it as a holiday destination, but it's a lovely, small city with lots of beautiful places to eat and swim. The Rhine River is very clean in Basel. Hubbie and I were swimming in it all summer. It would be a bit fast for young children, but there are tributaries which have wonderful grassy banks, plenty of shade, and the water is shallow. You may get just a few 'hot' hours in the late afternoon, but these pass quickly to lovely cool evenings. The Tangley Museum in Basel is brilliant for adults and children. There are lots of parks and museums across the city. All is easily accessible by walking, bus or tram. You're ideally situated for trips to France or Germany, as Basel Borders both. A train journey of 1-2hrs takes you up to the Alps, where there are even more outdoor activities for all ages. Far from being a winter destination, DH and I found Switzerland amazing in the summer!

Haha, DH just humorously suggested that your neighbour is elusive because he's growing pot in his spare room, and has had a leak in the set up!

Put EVERYTHING in writing, in duplicate and signed.