Domitianus

What happens if there really is an Inspector Sams (perhaps a police officer of same rank, or someone who work for the Inland Revenue) and he or she gets fed up with going up and down to the basement for no apparent reason? Surely this is somewhat ill-conceived as a policy? Why not just come out with it "There is a bomb in the building. Run like f**k!"

To say nothing of her inevitable ignorance of the hazards of increasing buggy traffic on our pavements.

Yeah, but I offer QUALITY lurvvving for the lonely lady. My Barry White collection is immense and it is all on vinyl - smooth as silk, sweet as honey! I don't fear no competition.

Can I just say that I am amazed at the flak (no matter how politely couched) that Kai has been getting here - poor tenant, how difficult it is for the tenant etc. All that may be true but I do know that eviction notices are not issued lightly and the tenant has usually given a landlord every reason to evict them if an eviction order is issued. So, whilst I think it wise for Kai to comply with the law, I don't think he has any obligation at all to incur any additional costs on behalf of a tenant who must have well over-stepped the mark to get evicted in the first place and who doesn't seem to have taken steps him/herself to sort the situation. I imagine that Kai has already had to invest quite a bit of time, energy and possibly money into this process and to expect him to further act as a de facto banker and storage facility to this tenant is a bit much. After all, who will pay the storage costs if this stuff is put in storage? Kai? The tenant who doesn't seem to want to deal with it? I'd be interested to know.

Michael Palaeologus Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I second (or third) the opening of an adult shop > in ED; but it must be equal opportunity - none of > this "ladies only" stuff. > > It should cater for women, men, those who are > transgender, all ages, all variations of physical > ability, race, age, religion and species. > > So that would be a sex shop running from the > Magadala all the way down to the EDT then. > > Should keep us occupied. I quite agree with your concern about this sexist agenda, MP. If we have a sex shop it should be for all genders at all times. Can you imagine the stink if any type of shop opened and announced that women would only be admitted if they were accompanied by a man? There would be World War Three. Also, what is this about a 'cheap' man-brothel? Listen, biatch, I ain't cheap! I got standards and demand enough pay per shag to at least buy a salmon and chips in the Sea Cow.

When working in government offices above a large shopping centre in Belfast we soon learnt that the announcement "Plumbers to the basement, please" meant there was a suspect device somewhere in the building. You may imagine my dismay when I heard this announcement being made whilst sitting on the loo, midway through a lengthy commune with nature!

longtalljohn Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Yesterday the tanoy asked for 'Carl Lewis to the > check out please'. > > She didn't have to ask a second time. Why not? Is he very obedient?

Would you prefer Nesbitt to give you a nosh with or without that ridiculous Village People moustache he sports in Murphy's Law?

I must say I agree with you entirely Rose. Perhaps we can raise this possibility the next time a local retail outlet goes up for sale and we start speculating about who will move in. Why should we limit ourselves to estate agents, kitchenware shops, clothes shops, M&S etc etc when we can have a good old-fashioned, local neighbourhood sex-shop selling s**tloads of porn, vibrators that dwarf the City of London gherkin and garish crotchless knickers? About time ED had its own sex shop but I guess DM and the like will bleat on about how sex is demeaning to women or the like (since we all know she had her kids by immaculate conception - snigger!!!)

Also let's not discriminate against the turkeys - their necks are just as beautiful as any other domestic fowl. We do them a grave disservice when we insist from our anthropocentric perspective that the only beautiful neck is a tight, toned and beautiful one. Liberate the turkeys!!!! They have feelings too!!!!

PeckhamRose Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Can we dispense with the sexist ageist crap about > turkey necks? Had she been a male you would not > have said it. My problem with her is that - like > Kim Humphreys of Southwark Council - they are > career politicians who are only interested in > their own careers and not the difficult > media-unfriendly problems of those they claim to > represent. I always thought Kate Hoey MP who > represented Vauxhall area was pretty respectable > and active, and not seemingly interested in being > seen to do the right thiings for the sake of it. > Tessa Jowell has no time for us but by law she > probably does have a regular surgery around here. No! The sexist, ageist crap is the only fun we get from out political representatives. It just happens that so many of Blair's Babes seemed almost identical and the desperate careerism, rigor mortis smiles and turkey necks were the defining features. If Gordon Brown had a turkey neck I would point it out as well but instead he looks like a great big monkey! I agree about Kate Hoey, however, she seemed quite capable and at least had the guts to back an unpopular cause - the countryside alliance. I have seen her in the airport a few times and she seemed very friendly - no airs and graces.

So is that what they are up to when they aren't sharpening their knives and shaving their meat?

Opening a school in two years time???? Our kids need education NOW, goddammit!!!!!

Nesbitt would give you a nosh if the money was right, I'll bet.

Lounged! Hey, it had to happen!

Excellent! But I WILL be allowed to wear my studded leather collar? On the weekends at least? Pleeeeezzee!

ChavWivaLawDegree Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > This and the Porche posts have had me laughing so > loud I'm scaring my neighbours! > > I was gonna say you can get it for ?10-20 in Soho > if you fancy something more sleazy, but then it > got me thinking. > > Why isn't there a Soho for women? > > Why don't women have places they can visit with a > gang of their mates, all tanked up and buy a bloke > for a tenner each? > > Do you think I'd be able to turn Underhill Road > into a ladies Soho? Anyone want to be my biatch? > > Ladies, do you fancy a bit of the other when the > old man's busting a gut in Canary Wharf? > > I'd test drive all the talent first to make sure > they are up to the job. > > It might just work, what do you reckon? I will be your biatch! I mean, why should the girls get all the fun? Being paid to shag all day? As long as I don't have to develop a drug habit to justify my choice of lifestyle!

You mean NOT using that type of protection - as you suggested in an earlier posting? I agree. Imagine the poor punters having to try to get turned-on whilst gazing into those empty and vacuous phizzogs! Hey, how long do you think we can get away with this heretical practice of diss'ing the sacred cows that are the ED yummy-mummies before we are either lounged or censored?

Wouldn't surprise me, and I bet, when nicked, she said (mentally, at any rate) "Don't you know who I am?" To which the copper prolly replied (mentally) "Yeah, you're that jumped up political tart who was married to a crook!" Ho-ho!

???

You mean a paper bag over their heads?

Harman! Of course! Another perfect example. The grim desperation to prove something to the world that just simmers constantly under that woman's facade!

Well all the yummy-mummies have to earn their pin-money somehow now that their hubbies are losing their City jobs! Problem is, I hear they are all lousy lays.

Either that or it is a brothel.

I believe the sign originally said "Sextuplets are extremely rare" but a couple of the neon tubes blew and there you have it!