brianb

pressure is mounting on rafa benitez. he has now gone 18 hours without a win

david cameron has announced new plans to combat unemployment. the first step is to deport roman abramovich

the cleaning lady at arsenal is being questioned along with all the mp`s about illegal expenses claims ! apparently she`s been claiming for silver polish for the last four years!

KERMIT THE FROG HAS SWINE FLU HE`S BEEN SHAGGING MISS PIGGY WITHOUT A CONDOM...WHAT A MUPPET

just been sacked from my job at the wines & spirits section at asda a paki came in and asked me to recommend a good port i said dover now fuck off

BIG DEAL....

put my tea in the oven earlier , went to get it out 20 mins later it had vanished- not a trace. thats the last time i get those mccann oven chips

heather mills has been seen beach combing in arbroath apparantly she`s hoping for a leg to turn up next

a man hires a chinese private investigator by the name of chen lee to watch his wife. a few days later he gets this report. most honorable sir, you leave house, he came to house,he and she leave house, i follow, he and she go to hotel, i climb tree and look in window, he kiss she, she kiss he, he strip , she strip, he play with she, she play with he, i play with me , i fall out tree, no fee ,chen lee, weely sollee

got a new car sterio, voice activated. i shout "country " it plays dolly parton i shout rock and it plays guns & roses... was driving thru town yesterday & some little brats ran out in front of me. i shouted fuckin kids and it played gary glitter

3 woman in a pub start talking about their husbands 1 says i call mine the dentist no one can drill like he does 2nd woman giggled i call mine a miner because he`s got a big shaft no 3 frowned i call mine the postman because he cums so early and half the time he sticks it in the wrong box

do you want a nokia n90 mobile phone 1000texts & 1000 minutes any network any time with it you get a 42" lcd tv a free apple ipod nano & a free stella mini fridge its a 6 month contract @ ?12.50 per month. simply log on to www.dreamonyoucunt.com

jack & jill went up the hill so jack could lick jills f*nny but jack got a shock & a mouthful of c*ck coz jills a pre-op tranny

the british population were asked if polish immigrants were a problem 23% said yes its a serious problem" 77% said " czesk bardzo mi milu gdzie djest toaldta "

osama bin laden has sent out a new video message to prove he is still alive in it he says heart of midlothian fc were absolutely shit at the weekend british intelligent services have dismissed it saying it could have been recorded anytime in the last 25 years