Naughty little pickles

[Fi from West Dulwich]

So, 16 month old O is turning into rather a pickle. He is, I hastily and rather smugly add, widely acknowledged to be particularly jolly and charming, but there is no getting away from the fact that he is increasingly full of mischief. In the past month alone he has:

- Dialled 999 during a tea party at my ex-boss's house.

- Eaten a highly poisonous mothball within minutes of arriving in our new house, resulting in ambulance ride to hospital.

- Fused the lights at his grandparents house.

- Bitten his best friend whilst I was in loco parentis (mortifying. Despite frantic rubbing of arnica onto cheek the teethmarks remained when F's mother returned).

- Picked up a huge and heavy dog bowl and smashed it with gusto onto the kitchen floor at Granny's house.

- Painstakingly dropped pebbles in to the spouts of the water features at the garden centre, so that they all, mysteriously, stopped working.

- Done a strip tease involving a cherry tomato and no nappy for my friends who watched in hysterics through the French window whilst I obliviously made tea indoors. Culminating in the proud delivery of a poo onto the floor.

- Been discovered inside the dishwasher.

We find ourselves alternating betwen paroxysms of laughter and tearing our hair out, but I am sure that we are not alone - I'd love to know what your own little rascals have been up to...

[ClareC]

My daughter is a bit small for such adventures, however, my nephews certainly have their moments! The two year old was sat in the trolley whilst my sister did the grocery shopping, whilst she was looking the other way he took a banana off the bunch in a passing shoppers trolley, peeled it and tucked in!

On another occasion he was naughty so was sat on the naughty step, he pomptly got up ad went back into the kitchen where everyone was. He was put back on the step and the kitchen door closed (he isnt tall enough to open it himself). Not to be deterred he went into the dining room, climbed on a chair, pushed the seving hatch open and crawled through into the kitchen!

[cg]

those stories made me laugh out loud and also feel good that i am not alone. My 13 month old boy has so far:-

- dialied my brother in law at 7am and left a babbling message on his answerphone

- been in his first scrap in nursery - in which he ended up with a bite mark!

- pulled off a whole cardboard tray of washing up liquid bottles in sainsburys

- been found in the washing machine with only legs dangling out

and now he can walk i dread to thing what further pickles he will get into. Agree that sometimes it makes you laugh but other times cry!!

[sophiesofa]

These stories have reminded me of what a terror my sister was when she was little

Got her head stuck in the back of a chair and had to be sawn out by a neighbour

Drank a whole bottle of calpol because she liked it and had to have her stomach pumped

Climbed the 6ft christmas tree to reach a chocolate and the tree fell on top of her

Took her clothes off at every opportunity

Jumped on the shopping trolley when i was a 2 week old baby and it fell over and my mum dived and caught me as i was falling out

locked my sister and her friend in the shed for 6 hours

tired to push my sister down the stairs because she wanted her to die

thankfully she's a lovely 30 year old now so don't despair, they won't always be terrors.

[The Nappy Lady]

Last winter I discovered my youngest merrily moving pieces of cole 1 at a time from the coal bucket to the WHITE settee.....

I was delighted as you can imagine, and she thought she was VERY clever.....

[snowboarder]

I imagine worse is to come....

but..

Consistently digs up plants in the garden and throws mud over (very new) deck;

Has swallowed a large button (from a white cardi of mine - wondered where it had gone, found in nappy);

Pulls cats tail. Cat then smacked him in the face(has to be said more effective than any of my attemps at stoping him from doing anything...hmm..cat knows better than me...);

Eats cat biscuits;

Acrobatics as fell into swimming pool (husband caught him upside down about to do great dive - he was fishing for a football);

Swipes at pebbles on gas fire. They have had to be removed;

Pulls all shoes in Jolie a pied off shelves at breakneck speed;

Posted all my jewellry into a wellie. Couldn't find anything for ages.

My husband thinks he should have NO! as a middle name. It's all we ever say to him.

[Ruth_Baldock]

My son isn't REALLY old enough to get up to too many high jinks, although he has started pulling off his socks and stuffing them down the front of his nappy (yeeeuuch).

Mum tells a story about me, at 14 months, coming up to her and giving her my favourite toys. She then watched me as i waddled, then crawled as this was quicker, to the cat's bed, got in, and then chewed on her cat toys. Apparantly I liked to lick the cat, eat her food and play in her cat litter too. Lovely.

[Fi from West Dulwich]

Love love love these stories! Had me laughing out loud, thank you all! But I think first prize has to go to Sophiesofa's sister having to be sawn out of the back of a chair. I can only hope that O reaches such dizzying heights of terrordom.

[Belle]

the list is endless. off the top of my head:

sampled his dad's unripe tomatoes in the garden;

pulled up busy lizzies by the roots;

pulled folded up (heavy) pram on top of himself

whilst lying on back having nappy changed, seized new 'baby' felt-tip and drew over himself, once I was distracted, grabbed nappy full of poo and flung contents all over himself, me and sofa

dialed one of my husband's clients and left a voicemail

went round to friend's house which is most def not baby proof and upturned cat's water and food, grabbed guitar and nearly broke it, ate all our afternoon tea goodies and then got chocolatey fingers all over the nice sofa, tried to pull wine bottles off rack

chewed temp sensor off monitor so that it now constantly flashes on alert

prised lid off sudocrem, plunged finger in and licked appreciatively

ditto metanium and aveeno cream

god I must sound like the most permissive, unwatchful mother in east D! but seriously the boy is fast.

[Fi from West Dulwich]

He sounds like he could give O a run for his money. Think O's piece de resistance was probably going to newly-wed friends for Sunday lunch and spending the ENTIRE time hiding their proudly displayed, brand new, wedding list items (got Facebook message afterwards asking if we knew where the rest of their coasters were. Could hardly bring myself to admit over the side of their balcony), helping himself to his father's beer, then, in a final and I think rather inspired move, turning on the TV and selecting firstly Dave, and secondly, the adult channel. I think we pushed back their plans for a family by at least 5 years.

[Belle]

hah Fi - I think our's puts people off too! I missed out one:

At the Horniman Busy Bees session we were given honeycomb to pass around (between adults, letting the little ones touch but not hold). My little boy of course grabbed it out of my hands, broke off a big piece and ATE it. Argh. Both embarassing and slightly icky.

this morning he went into the bathroom when his dad was shaving and methodically put all of his bath toys in the loo, resulting in some terse words between mum and dad about who was meant to be watching him.

[GinaG3]

Ha, these made me laugh. My daughter is an explorer for a living at 18 months, very young, but very calculated!!!

We've had;

Getting leg stuck in cot railings (don't know how or why)

Often ringing people on my phone, she has left 7 minute long voice messages before!

Trying to climb in the bin as a result head first legs dangling out the waste paper basket.

Moving 'dirty' fake coal from gas fire to my nice clean carpet.

We were due to go on holiday, but she hid her shoe, her only pair and one was missing. ERGHH! Nightmare, after we returned from holiday I found it in the tomy eggbox! Clever..

The usual climbing in the washing machine, or winding up in the curtain. Sitting underneath the computer desk with all the wires (I HATE THIS DANGEROUS BEHAVIOUR!!)

She loves to climb on the arms of the sofa, balance and then try getting on the window sill to watch the 'carcars' or alternatively just nose dive off the back of the sofa. It depends who she feels I suppose.

Kids are hilarious to watch growing up, I've laughed more times in the last few months than EVER before!

[cuppa tea]

It's my three year old boy's job to be up to as much mischief as possible...still...and he takes his work very seriously!

*taking the tops off the salt and pepper grinders in the park cafe and emptying the contents all over the table/floor.

*watering the inside of the house with the hosepipe on full and then turning it on me as I try to turn it off.

*Pooing on my shoe, absolutely on purpose!

*Showering the whole sofa with milk out of his cup.

*Doing a (I quote) "walking wee" across the carpet

*Weeing in the middle of an egg and spoon race...and he wasn't even in the race!

*Bringing snails into the house and sticking them on the walls.

*Trying to push my credit card down the gap between the floorboards.

*Making it "snow" with flour over the kitchen.

And I could go on. THere's never a dull moment though.

[Fi from West Dulwich]

Am re-allocating first prize to you, Cuppa Tea, for what has to be the best list of all! Your little boy sounds absolutely priceless, although I fear that O may be a contender to his crown in a few years time...

[cuppa tea]

Yes, your little one sounds like he's well on his way Fi! They definitely get more calculated about it as they get older I reckon. I keep thinking this zestful curiosity and michief making must be coming to a peak at 3yrs, but I have a real feeling it's personality! I love Sophiesofa's sawn out of the back of a chair story. Brilliant ha!