hairwashing traumas

[Belle]

My 21mth old has never much liked having his hair washed, but the situation is getting ridiculous...we used to make do with kind of sponging his hair down if there was an obvious need to e.g. food in it, then every so often would steel ourselves to do it properly. However he's increasingly upset about water on his face, to the point that tonight, despite us both being there, the minute he saw me pick up the shampoo bottle he just screamed and climbed out of the bath into my arms. He's done that before, but usually half way through so I've managed to finish the job just about. Have also tried the shower but he's just as scared of that. It's awful to see him so scared, so I'm really not keen to be too forceful - but at the same time he does need his hair washed now and again. We do have one of those jugs with a rubber rim but it's pretty much useless. Plus, he's wise to any water being within 2 feet of his face now so not sure any gadget will do the trick.

What do people normally do in this situation? maybe hold off for a bit and hope he gets over it? I have a feeling it'll be a while...

[cate]

Does he not like water in his eyes? You could put some goggles on him and make a game of it. And perhaps he doesn't he like having his hair combed afterwards if it is tangly. You can get one of those tangle teasers at hairdressers that get rid of tangles in a flash without hurting.

[Pickle]

We lie our kids back in the bath to wash their hair - son (nearly 4) has a massive water in eyes phobia, so it's the only way we can do it without him screaming.

[Ko]

we tilt baby back to stop too much water getting in his eyes. also use palm of my hand to slick back the shampoo from his temples to stop that running into his eyes. its not easy when they don't like it!

[GinaG3]

My daughter is the same age and has always hated having water near her face. We just got on with it and tried not to get it in her face, she now knows to tip her head back when water is coming. She also watches us bath and wash our hair all the time and even tries to do it for me now. I think if they see you doing it regularly it does help.

We have select toys in the bath and they normally distract well. She just doesn't seem to like standing up for a bum wash now. Grr it really is one or the other.

[untamedstylist]

other than whats already been suggested you could always try a water spray froma local hardware shop he wont susspect it well not the first time lol

just have to get on with it i guess and he'll have to just get over it, theres plenty of things kids dont like doing but they have to with certain things! i know that might sound a little harsh but whats got to be done has to be done!

probs the lying on his back bathing using ur palm to wash his head will be the easiest as has already been suggested....

as for the tangletease, that the oh so lovely CATE suggested... that might be too sharp on his soft skin as he is a baby and ?10-15 would be rather alot to spend on a baby comb!

i would suggest a spray leave in conditioner and a wide soft comb from a baby shop or something similarand deffinately combing wet not dry..

[damzel]

I remember hating getting my hair washed as a kid and it was because I have particularly sensitive eyes, not that anyone knew that then! My mum bought a round disc type thing that fitted around my head with a wide brim all the way round. Difficult to describe but I probably looked like Saturn from the top! It did the trick and I was all ready to use one with my daughter as she seemed to hate having soap/water in her eyes too. However, my (australian water loving) partner put paid to that idea and just gave her no choice but to get very wet and enjoy it. He got in the bath with her and played very messy water games week after week, without trying to wash her hair, jsut making sure she was soaked from head to toe. She loved it and now she doesn't mind at all about getting water or soap in her eyes. I wish someone had done that with me - I still hate getting water in my eyes!

[craigy]

always been an issue in our house to the point that we only do it once a week... i have one of the baby fabric sling that babies lay on in the bath and use that so it minimizes the risk of water in his eyes... other option is that sometimes I get in the bath with him and sit him between my legs and he lays backwards onto me and we do it that way...

[sanity girl]

My daughter used to be like this. I'm afraid I resorted to bribery with chocolate buttons/smarties combined with using the special jug with rubber rim. It worked. Now she's a bit older I've encouraged her to wash her hair herself and she likes that - when it's her tipping the water over her head she doesn't mind it getting in her eyes!

[snowboarder]

B - have I told you how I do Z? He screeches when I get his face wet too - so I just get all toys out in bath immediately and start washing him with flannel whilst he plays...the wet flannel surreptitiously reaches his head without him noticing and wets his hair enough for shampoo, quick shampoo moment then do my best still with flannel to get soap out. It takes a bit longer (and yes easier when have less hair!) and usually end up with one last wipe when I go over his head and wipe his face - but quick and as with flannel all excess off quite quickly!

Did try just pouring water over head for a bit as short sharp shock tactic but did not go well - wouldnt even get in bath after couple of days. As above - strangely when he splashes his OWN face it's funny.....

Brushing teeth, however, is our current battleground....

[craigy]

have also battled the teeth cleaning too and at its peak used to swaddle him in a towel and then straddle him cleaning them whilst he howled and tried to get away... thankfully have not scared him too much and he now attempts it himself and then I finish off... it will get better

[sillywoman]

Have never used shampoo on any of mine so hairwashing never been a problem, they just lie down in the bath & swish their hair round a bit, job done. I've posted about this before so won't bore on, but just to say, maybe don't use shampoo any more - kids don't need it, just some clever marketing ploy over the years to put money in the pockets of big companies has made us all think that they do. Why create more stress in family life - it's stressful enough already? Give it a go.

P.S. My kids hair looks and smells just like everyone else's. You'd never know.

[cate]

Have you tried electric toothbrushes for your families? Fantastic for everyone. Much more thorough and fun to use. The best ones have timers that go off after 30 seconds so you know when to change from top to bottom or front to back.

[Belle]

Great ideas from everyone, thanks! Sillywoman - think you're right, hence we used to make do a lot with flanneling his hair, it's more the water issue now I think that's the problem. He's a crafty beggar so I think I'm going to have to be quick to try some of these techniques, as he can get out of the bath v v easily now. I think trying to do it with me in the bath alongside would be a good starting point. Thanks all!

re brushing teeth - we strike a deal where we 'have our turn' doing his teeth i.e. they get done properly, then he does them himself.

[Ko]

we also keep a couple of favourite toys which he is only allowed when nappy changed or in the bath - those toys keeps the novelty factor and hence keep them distracted a little longer!!

[Mook]

Whenever I wash my little boys hair I put my hand like a visor over his eyebrows (as though you are shielding his eyes from the sun), pour the water over his head and at the same time with "the visor hand" I push his hair towards the back of his head - a little bit of water still runs down his face, but most of it gets swept back.

Also how long is your little boys hair? - may be worth cutting the hair short.

I have heard so many stories of children who hate having water on their face until they go on a family holiday and spend the whole time in the swimming pool - a few trips to the swimming baths may help.

Good luck