Fuschia Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Don't read if it's going to rile you, please!Not really wanting a debate about everything I post, this is for those seeking an alternative to the drive to encourage independence and 'selfsoothing'http://www.letthebabydrive.com/letthebabydrive/Multi_Sensory.htmlI came to this approach naturally with child no 1 who was high needs and often would cry while all I could do was to be there and try to keep myself calmInteresting article and in line with 'happiest baby on the block' approach if you have read that or seen dr karp on YouTube Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moos Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Edited. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431743 Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowboarder Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I like this - quite reassuring when I think back to poor stressed out baby 1 - and I thought I was 'doing it all wrong' too. With baby 2 - well not so much - but we have been more relaxed....so maybe that's why? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431745 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuschia Posted May 2, 2011 Author Share Posted May 2, 2011 It probably has an impact sb but I think it comes down to personality tooI like the idea of accepting maybe you can't fix it and just offering empathyHolds good as a strategy for toddlers tooBut oh how I remember standing at the open door to the garden one day watching the rain pour down while little c howled on my shoulder and somehow accepting I couldn't stop it but it was enough just to be there, together' I know, I know, I know 'A very soothing mantra for both me and him Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431750 Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowboarder Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Fuschia Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> But oh how I remember standing at the open door to> the garden one day watching the rain pour down> while little c howled on my shoulder and somehow> accepting I couldn't stop it but it was enough> just to be there, together> > ' I know, I know, I know '> > A very soothing mantra for both me and himI remember having similar epiphany one night with Z after the umpteenth screaming wake up!! Had just read what mothers do and that had an impact too... Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431752 Share on other sites More sharing options...
helena handbasket Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Completely agree.I loved Karp's fourth trimester theories. His advice about how to swaddle and sway during the hard nights of colic were really helpful.He has some fun stuff for toddlers too. In Happiest Toddler on the Block he looks at how babies-toddlers go through all the stages of evolution in primatology...... in two years. Really gives some perspective on how quickly they change and how difficult it must be for them to understand what's going on. It's hilarious because it teaches you toddler talk to communicate through tantrums etc., like : "You mad! You want cookie! Can't have! So mad!". Mine responded a bit to it, not completely but I got the point. I love his work and even if you don't get into it think it's worth a read. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431756 Share on other sites More sharing options...
gwod Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Completely agree that its a great philosophy for parenting as they get older, as they become better communicators you realise that you absolutely cannot fix most of their problems (loss or pain for example), but your unquestioning empathy, love, and patience can make them stronger and fitter for the world as a whole. Hate the title though. 'Happiest Toddler on the Block' smacks of the sort of competitive and comparing parenting that can mess us all up if we dont watch out! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431794 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuschia Posted May 2, 2011 Author Share Posted May 2, 2011 True! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431795 Share on other sites More sharing options...
helena handbasket Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Well mine always seemed to be the grumpiest baby/toddler on the block :) so that was a goal I never aspired to. At least I learned it wasn't ALL my fault. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/17012-sensitive-babies-and-the-4th-trimester/#findComment-431811 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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