Welcome to the CGF!..

[carlafindle]

Pussy was probably expecting to see a friendly face.

[diable rouge]

KK draws a blank in his search for jumbo hot dog rolls...

Sorry mate, there was a sudden rush on them after the anal sex thread, can I tempt you with a couple of baps?

[maxxi]

Red (and his own personal hot dog) taunts KK - "Now zat you ave a wheat shortage and ze Brexit meesewer zere will be non long bread for you!!

[Spartacus]

Mr Chicken gets so angry about cars on his healthy street that he starts throwing his toys out of his pram

"Perhaps if they're quick enough they can block off both ends of the road and trap some cars inside" he mutters to himself as no-one else is listening

[diable rouge]

While hubby is away in Wales channeling his inner Withnail and I, Mrs Bob decides it's now a good time to stimulate the local building economy into action with her own version of Rishi's Dishis while respecting social distancing...

Is this the queue for Mrs Bob's 'Meat out and I'll help out'? inquired Pavel...

[Spartacus]

Peter John decides to bring phase 4 of the healthy streets project forward and installs a fort in Dulwich Village

"when the floods come we can tax them when using boats to get into the village" he tells the council chamber and his trusty side kick Pirate Jimbo

[diable rouge]

The Buzzards are having a bit of a 'domestic' after hubby Bob promised his wife they would be the first house in CG to install a lift...

I wanted one of those fancy lifts like they have in The Glades in Brommers, not a fecking Stannah stair lift!...

[TheArtfulDogger]

The Hill Billy family descend from Dog Kennel Hill in their old jaloppy after drinking enough moonshine to turn them blind just to shout insults at people using the EDF on Ulverscroft road

"There's no way of building more cycle lanes or improving bus services (or getting enough room to drive our shack) without restricting the volume of other traffic and the places it can park"

[diable rouge]

Neighbours are concerned the Buzzards have taken the Neighbourhood Watch scheme too far as the Domino's courier discovers...

Do you have anything else to declare apart from a Two 4 Tuesday meal deal with extra Banofee Pie?

Darling, remember it's my turn to wear the rubber glove! squealed an excited Mrs Buzzard...

[diable rouge]

KK having finally resolved his front of house WC problem, reveals all to Mrs KK...

''Ta-daaaaa!..Yeah, I know it looks like a Portaloo, but the builder who sold it to me swore blind it's a Continental Shower and they're all the rage in Clapham!''

[KidKruger]

🤣🤣😭

[diable rouge]

Style Police Officer Nigello patrols the Dulwich environs, his mission to protect the public from aesthetically-challenged assaults to the street landscape...

Typical! Another ugly, tawdry attempt by the Council at traffic calming. The Bloomsbury Set would be turning in their graves!

Edited October 14, 2022 by diable rouge

[Spartacus]

Admin, in his final few days of managing the community website, makes it his mission to silence the trolls

"what do you mean I can't respond" cries CFE before he can drop the mike

[Spartacus]

Mr. Chicken is spitting feathers about people parking for no charge in his streets.

"Its all about going green and all those poor council workers who can't afford to eat unless we squeeze the pips out of the motorists" he cries 

Edited August 7, 2023 by Spartacus