Total Admiration!

[nicolemodesti]

This is not intended to start any debate or divide the role of any mothers/fathers but just wanted to say that I am in total awe of any single mother/father or one whose partner works away a lot!

My partner has just returned from a 2 week working stint in Dubai and while he has had the odd times of a few days abroad, in Paris or Belgium, this was the longest and least expected (night before departure he found out) that I have experienced.

So it was a constant round of childcare for my 3 year old, nursery drop off (yes fortunately at Breakfast club at my school),pick up from childminder, household chores and my full time role as an Assistant Head Teacher (as well as 2.5 days teaching time), late nights on the computer playing catch up, weekend lessons for my son and no family here as all in Australia and mother in law holidaying in Barbados!! And let's not forget entertaining the kitten......I am fortunate that my partner is very hands on and totally appreciates my career but knackered I was after this 2 weeks!!And possibly wept tears of joy upon his return or were they relief?

So I take my hat off to you, who manage it on your own, and salute you completely!! As well, I salute any mother/father in these times!!

[Ruth_Baldock]

Hear, hear. My Mum was a single parent for a few years, and as a baby and toddler I had very severe asthma and was in and out of hospital constantly. My son also has athma and we had a l of hospital admissions last year. No idea how my mum coped with it all, and worked FT- I wasn't working and had the support of my husband and family too, which my mum didn't have and I was cracking up.

It's hard when your partner works away,isn't it? Mr B has worked away a few times, most notably when our son was bang in the middle of his 4mo sleep regression. I felt like I was losing the will to live, honestly...

[zeban]

Thirded. My Mum is a single parent, and I'm in awe of her everyday, as I am of all other single parents :)

[hellosailor]

Couldn't agree more. My mum was a single parent - my dad walked out on their marriage for another woman when me and my brother were babies (premature twins, and pretty high maintenance!) and I'm ashamed to say that before having my own baby this year I always found the fact that she struggled to cope (she had a breakdown) rather hard to reconcile in my head - I didn't quite get it, because I remember vividly her unravelling before our eyes, even though I was a baby I can remember it clearly, and I'm embarrassed to admit that when she used to talk about it in subsequent years I used to think 'Couldn't she have held it together better if she'd tried a bit harder?'

I feel very humble when I think of this now, and can't believe I thought my mum had been weak to go under somewhat with all that going on, when I struggled to cope for the first couple of months of parenthood with the full support of my partner, and only one, perfectly healthy baby.

Sorry, didn't mean to come over all grave! But do feel an idiot for not getting it until I had my own baby.

[snowboarder]

Absolutely. My days are long and I can't wait for the weekend and a bit of company! I have always thought that the weekends must be hard when you are on your own with children - whenever mr snowboarder has been away I have struggled as don't want to interrupt others 'family' time. At least during the week there are activities etc! But I suppose you somewhat adapt to your circumstances...

[Jessie]

Thank you! As a single parent (albeit one who is more a co-parent with my ex these days) it's very heartening to read such comments.

[sanity girl]

Yes I agree as a single parent it's nice to read. I don't find it so bad, but I am fortunate to have extremely supportive and hands on parents nearby. Weekends are fine - there's always plenty going on and non single friends with kids who are still happy to meet up :)

Evenings can be a but lonely - roll on when I can get baby 2 off the boob and get out in the evening!

[nicolemodesti]

Aww bless you all!! Hello sailor, know what you mean about a parent breaking down from a nervous breakdown as my mother did too while my father would work in different and weird places, such as Iran and Sudan, in the 80s while caring for 4 children on her own.

Sanity Girl - baby 2 off the boob and on your own - hat off again!!

And Jessie even co parenting is still effectively single.

Say it again - well done ladies, you are made of strong stuff!!

[Moos]

Yee-ha for single parents - you're amazing, and you don't get told nearly often enough. Great thread, nicolemodesti.