Ladies or women?

[red devil]

In today's complicated, politically correct world, I find 'love' or 'pet' is a good catch-all...

[Otta]

El Pibe Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> What does a Katy "I Can Cook" Ashworth fetish say

> about me?

It says "get in line".

[El Pibe]

As a one-time Potter I'm partial to 'duck'.

[El Pibe]

"It says "get in line"."

:)

[Ridgley]

I really don?t see what the problem is would you rather be called the following

1. Chav

2. Bird

3. Shelia

4. Crumpet

In parts of England some people are called love again I don?t see that has a problem it is part of the regional differences.

[EPB]

According to a teacher at my school, Ladies always referred to one another as 'women'; Charwomen always referred to one another as 'ladies'

And I've never understood why, in golf clubs, they have a Men's section and a Ladies' section. Surely it should be either Men and Women or Gentlemen and Ladies?

[womanofdulwich]

ever met a golfer? question answered.

[Ridgley]

TheArtfulDogger Wrote:

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> My father used to call women he didn't know

> sweetheart or darling

>

> Thankfully that sort of behaviour is dying out

> these days

>

> Thankfully and soon, love, there will be no more

> talk like that

Happy with any of the above - they make me smile.

Not too keen on 'dear' though, although it doesn't keep me awake at night.

No your father was a gentleman that is dying out these days

[red devil]

womanofdulwich Wrote:

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> ever met a golfer? question answered.

Excuse me love, I don't think you're allowed in here...

[Eddleston]

Yeah ladies sounds a bit postmodern I?d rather go with milady. That would be ok for me.

[first mate]

Asset,

I think if you have an overload of sensibilities, so much so that they can be grated on, then that is certainly proof that you are indeed a lady. Now pass me the smelling salts.

[Asset]

I couldn't possibly, just reading this thread has made me come over all weak and I'm

not sure my pretty little head can deal with it all.

RosieH has put the argument much more succinctly than me.

Also, could people stop accusing me (or others) about getting het up - next you'll be suggesting we have hysterectomies.

[northlondoner]

I suppose biach is out of the question

[Asset]

I get that quite a lot funnily enough.

Actually - I really don't mind if someone calls me 'love' or 'dearie' or whatever, it's a different thing altogether.

[Asset]

My unreconstructed other half regularly refers to me as his bird - I don't really mind that either. He wouldn't dare call me a lady though lol.

[????]

I think that you just find it old fashioned and that don't suit a modern bird like you. It's like I've always called my mum and dad just that but some people do call theirs mother and father...if my kids called me father I'd be putting a stop to that.

[RosieH]

Alan Medic Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> RosieH Wrote:

>

> > "Lady" is a loaded term - it implies gentility,

> > refinement, delicacy - it comes with a whole

> set

> > of messages that piss women off because men

> aren't

> > subjected to the same set of expectations.

>

> 'Loaded term' my elbo. Only in your head. Strange

> creatures as *Bob* said.

Only in my head? And Asset's? And Katienumbers'? And every other woman who dislikes it.

You're right, you're right, of course you are. Silly old me, to try to tell a man what it is to be a woman, when of course he knows best. (of course, the OED definition was probably written by a silly little woman who didn't know what's what either).

You know how a St George's Cross is sometimes seen as a sign of racism? That's all in my head too of course! What a dolt I've been. What a clever chap you are, with what a sound grounding in semiotics.

I'm off to burn my Lacan in the hearth to make a fire for my husband's tea. But I'll probably have to get him to strike the matches.

[Otta]

"Lady" is a loaded term - it implies

gentility,

> > refinement, delicacy"

To be fair, the vast majority of people who use the word probably don't intend to convey any of that stuff, so is it fair to load their words with the things that you find offensive. Most people will use lady because it is part of the vocabulary they have grown up with.

[RosieH]

Otta, I'm not foaming at the mouth about this, but the point is that sexism is embedded in our culture. I'd really rather it wasn't.

I'm not having a massive go at the people who use words that they've grown up with without thinking they might be offensive.

But once those on the receiving end tell them that they are offensive / grating / whatever, it pisses me off if those same people tell me women (or whoever) are wrong to think it and they're going to carry on as usual because it's just all in our heads.

We don't still use "coloured" or "half-caste". My nan never said those words to insult anyone, but she too refused to accept that they could be offensive. The rest of us moved on.

[uncleglen]

I was at a meeting with some council officers and other people and someone said 'I don't want to be a n***** in the wood pile.....' and all hell broke loose

[Otta]

RosieH Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Otta, I'm not foaming at the mouth about this, but

> the point is that sexism is embedded in our

> culture. I'd really rather it wasn't.

>

> I'm not having a massive go at the people who use

> words that they've grown up with without thinking

> they might be offensive.

>

> But once those on the receiving end tell them that

> they are offensive / grating / whatever, it pisses

> me off if those same people tell me women (or

> whoever) are wrong to think it and they're going

> to carry on as usual because it's just all in our

> heads.

>

> We don't still use "coloured" or "half-caste". My

> nan never said those words to insult anyone, but

> she too refused to accept that they could be

> offensive. The rest of us moved on.

All fair enough, but the fact is that a lot of women / ladies on here have said they couldn't care less. Yes if you said to me you didn't like me calling you something, I'd stop it, but I wouldn't necessarily assume that all of womankind had the same feelings as you about it.

[Asset]

maybe because it's so ingrained and they're not really thinking about the connotations......

[zeban]

Rosie, I'm sorry but to compare 'coloured' or 'half caste' to using the word 'lady' is absolutely ridiculous.

[Asset]

she's not - she's comparing the use of outdated and inappropriate terminology.

[zeban]

And the word lady does not come into that category!!! therefore she is comparing them