Do you swear by the dream feed?

[Polly D]

That's it really. So many people I know do. We didn't with son 1 (a good sleeper after a difficult start), and have tried with son 2 (now 4 months) but it doesn't seem to make any difference to him any more. It seemed to for maybe 2 weeks but since he turned 12 weeks he wakes more.

I'm willing him to sleep through. I know it could be worse but we are a bit knackered now.

My main concern about the dream feed is interrupting his sleep cycle.

I know they're all different, just can't decide whether to persevere with the dream feeding business or not. He takes both formula and breast milk happily, doesn't seem to have a preference.

[Pickle]

With #1 and #3, yes, until they were well established on solids (dropped it at around 8 months). With #2, no - it didn't seem to make a difference to her at all, and as I was more tired at the time I struggled to stay up late enough to make it worthwhile (she didn't take a bottle).

With #3 it wasn't so much a dream feed, as I used to haul her downstairs into the light so I could watch tv :)

My experience with my dream fed babies is that they would sleep from the feed at 11pm-ish through till pretty much morning, with #3 sometimes waking for a very quick feed at 5:30ish but then settling back to sleep. Non dream fed daughter would wake at around 3am, but was easy to settle back to sleep after a short feed.

Probably not much help, they're all different, and it has to be what's best for you too x

[Fuschia]

I always fed all mine whenever I went to bed (bf and cosleeping) as that meant I had the best chance if maximising my sleep. They would always want feeding at about 5am regardless, but then generally slept again till 7.

But neither of those feeds precluded some night waking which went in phases, sometimes just once, at 1am or 3am, occasionally 2-3 times.

So not a magic wand in my view. But a lovely cuddly feed and very good for milk supply

[WorkingMummy]

I have co-slept with each of my three. Mostly, I did this because I loved to do it.

My baby boy is now 9 months old and onto a good amount of solids. He goes down into his own bed at about 7:30 but he still wakes himself every night between about 10:00 and midnight for a feed. I am generally so knackered, that I take him into bed with me at that point and keep him there until morning and he helps himself to what he needs. I may swap sides once or twice in the night but it is all a bit of a blur.

I have never woken any of mine specifically to feed them as no 1 was pretty much like my baby boy (woke up regularly in the night would co-sleep with me from the first night-time feed until morning) and no 2 was the exact opposite and slept right through (7pm-7am) from about 6 months (unless she was teething or had a dirty nappy or a cold or something).

They are all very different.

You might experiment with not waking your baby for a feed, see what difference (if any) it makes. If it makes no difference (as with Pickle's 2nd baby), you may find the solution to your tiredness is to go to bed earlier yourself (if your circumstances allow it).

In any event, I have never had a baby who slept through the night at 12 weeks. Like I said, even my no 2, who has always been a very good sleeper, did not routinely sleep through until 6 months and she frequently goes through phases (even now at 2.5) where she will need some care or attention of some kind in the night. (The next phase, I predict, will be when we start to eliminate night time nappies.)

[KateW]

My daughter (now 29 months) has always been a pretty good sleeper and I did a 10.30pm feed (woke her, not a dream feed) religiously til she was about 5 months old. (She was BF til 3 months then formula). I stopped because, despite having a late feed, she never slept later than 5.30am, when she would wake, have a feed then I'd try and get her back to sleep til 7am. So, at 5 months, I just stopped giving her the feed and she slept from 7pm til 5.30am, quick feed then get her back to sleep til 7am. meant I could go to bed at 9pm and have a better sleep. Have you tried just not giving it to him?

[KatDew]

I always did a dream feed. Number 1 child slept through from dreamfeed till morning from around 6/8 weeks till 8 months till he became an appalling sleeper for a few months between 8-12 months

Number 2 and 3 children were twins. Did the dreamfeed. They weren't as good sleepers as our eldest but they were small premmies. One slept through intermittently again same appalling phase between 8-12 months, one never slept through until a year old.

So same routine, same milk supply, mixed results!

As others have said there was always the thought that it couldn't do any harm and had the potential to maximise the shared sleep and it was always a nice sleepy feed.

All my kids have slept amazingly from a year old before that it was a bit hit and miss.

[bishop]

Baby 1: Yes, dreamfeed worked like a, er, dream. He dropped it around 13mo, which was bottle, by then, was pregnant with....

Baby 2: Doesn't make a blind bit of difference.

[rougepamplemousse]

I dream feed my little one since she was 6 months and started on solids.

I did not wake her. So she had a feed at at 7.30pm, than I would dream feed her at 10.30 and she would sleep until 7.30 am

BUT, and I think this is important, they will have to have all recommended amount of milk during the day which means more feeds during the day. At least that's what worked for us :)

[silkematt]

We used to wake our little girl religiously between 10.30- 11.00 and gave her a bottle- that way I could make sure how much she really drank and spot difference between a hungry cry- or just a cry for attention! Maia slept in her own room since she was 7 weeks old and would NEVER wake up before 7 am- unless she was unwell! Now she is 21 months and sleeps from 7.30 - 8.15 every night, plus 2-2,5 after lunch!

I am a believer in firm routines as our little darling is just the happiest child ever and loves her sleep- day and night!

Yes, children are all different, but unless you help them find a rythm they will justt be grizzly and overtired with parents completely exhausted! I am convinced that with the right structure every child can sleep 12 hours without waking!

I simply dodnt understand how parents cope with broken sleep for years!

Good luck! Silke(mother of 1 and nanny and sleep trainer for over 15 years)