HELP!! Anxious, stressed seven year old :-(

[Mens]

... How can I deal with my seven year old who has suddenly become terrified of practically everything?

She won't let me put petrol in the car, take a shower, won't go to birthday parties or anything! Prior to this she was extremely confident and carefree.

Is this a phase seven year olds go through?

Her dad won't let me contact a therapist. HOW can I deal with it? I want her back to herself.

[Ondine]

They do go through all kinds of phases. Can you recognise any trigger for this behaviour?

[Monkey]

I went through something similar as a child (not quite as bad though). Trigger was an extremly bad experience at a summer club when I ws six. I really wished my parents had got me some help...

[Saffron]

What's wrong with contacting a therapist? Did her dad have a bad experience with it?

Even if it is just a phase, a therapist could help you develop coping skills to transition out of it and also deal with future occurrences.

I had terrible anxiety as a child. I wish it had been recognised and treated earlier. Xx

[GinaG3]

Could you sit down with her for the night on your own? Maybe popcorn, DVD, sweets and have a girly night together? Or something else she really enjoys? Try and find out the problem and how you can help, let her know you are there for her whatever she needs.

Could it maybe be linked to nightmares? Or simply wanting to spend alone time with a parent if the child is one of a sibling? Possibly something has happened at school and they are looking for reassurance over the holidays and its playing out in separation anxiety.

I hope you find a solution thats right for you and your daughter is okay. It may well just be a phase. xxx

[Mens]

Thank you for your replies and PMs. I have edited this post as it was abit dramatic but the original had more info.

I'm pretty sure it was triggered by her recent allergic reaction which scared her. She just doesn't trust anyone except for me (and I'm not particularly brave).

We had a nice chat late last night which meant she went to bed without any tears.

She insists that the only thing making her sad is her allergies so I only have that to work with.

Her dad dotes on her and thinks she's super smart, super talented etc (she's actually just a regular kid) so he doesn't want to believe she needs any type of therapy....but that's a whole other story...

[Saffron]

Can you go to a sympathetic GP/HV ostensibly for advice about the allergies, then also ask about help with anxiety while you're there?

[Mens]

Her allerygy specialist knows how stressed she was so I will speak to her at her next appointment about any additional support they can offer her/us.

There was a psychologist at my other daughter's medical appointment because they were worried that we were stressed about her (we actually weren't)

I should probably try to get hold of her.

Thank you Saffron.

[canela]

I would imagine that a serious allergic reaction is really scary and would leave most people shaken and scared - especially a young child and a mother! This must be a common response and I presume the allergy specialists will have some advice in how to build up confidence again.