Good lines...

[Mick Mac]

My body likes your body, but when you speak my brain gets angry.

Edited to say. That was from The Mindy Project :)

[PeckhamRose]

If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

(Was that from Dr Hook?)

[malumbu]

My friend Everard.

25 years later was Mr Grayson really talking about a friend who was ever hard?? Such innocent days. Or probably not.

[Mick Mac]

Malumbu.

A "line" is something you say in the hope of getting off with someone.

[Mick Mac]

My magical watch says you aren't wearing any underwear! It must be an hour fast.

[nashoi]

Mick Mac Wrote:

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> Malumbu.

>

> A "line" is something you say in the hope of

> getting off with someone.

Hope over expectation presumably, given the evidence

[Loz]

Dunno about good lines, but an (English) friend thought it would be a winning move to try and convince a girl in a pub that he was a biscuit designer from Australia.

I really haven't a clue why he thought it would work, but unsurprisingly, it didn't. Possibly in part because his Aussie accent wavered somewhere between India and Yosemite Sam.

[Otta]

Do you believe you in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

[Otta]

Have you got a mirror in your pants? Only I can see myself in there.

[Otta]

?As you wish"

Princess Bride

[Seabag]

Are they all your own teeth ?

It's a sure fire winner in the upper age bracket trawl

[Dog duck]

...I'm as tired as cucumber in a convent

[Alan Medic]

I thought this was a thread about fishing........

[maxxi]

Alan Medic Wrote:

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> I thought this was a thread about fishing........

Terry Thomas (not that one) used to sign off his fishing spot on tv with: "Tight lines everyone, tight lines."

[Salsaboy]

'Sweating like a very short nun at a penguin shooting competition.'

[Loz]

Another friend's dreadful attempt - he was from Wigan, so imagining the accent helps.

He walked up to a fairly large chested girl in the pub, pointed straight at her chest and said, "'Eck - I bet you din't get many of them to tha' pound".

She wasn't impressed.

[Alan Medic]

Early year in Secondary School. English teacher reads something and asks the class can anyone use the word 'goad' in a sentence.

Yes miss I say putting my hand up.

Go on then.

Miss, one day I goad down the road to buy sweets.

I was a comic genius even then.

[KalamityKel]

Loz Wrote:

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> Another friend's dreadful attempt - he was from

> Wigan, so imagining the accent helps.

>

> He walked up to a fairly large chested girl in the

> pub, pointed straight at her chest and said, "'Eck

> - I bet you din't get many of them to tha'

> pound".

>

> She wasn't impressed.

Loz, this "friend", is this you?

[Loz]

KalamityKel Wrote:

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> Loz, this "friend", is this you?

Ha ha - nope. Us Aussies aren't that subtle.

[vgrant]

what is this sexist shit ?

[Jeremy]

Have you had much luck with that one, woody?

[Mick Mac]

I found this on t'internet

I wish you were my big toe? Then I would bang you on every piece of furniture in my house

[Dopamine1979]

Smooth.

[LadyDeliah]

'Sit on my face' sometimes works on some of the women I know, but only if the guy is hot snyway.

'Are you into squirters?' tends to work for me when I'm out hunting, not sure this is a line though, more investigative enquiries.

[StraferJack]

Girl, are you a wed Anderson film because you look absolutely stunning but I can't see this going anywhere