School 'refusers'

[Belle]

Do anyone know much about this phenomenon? I'm just finding out about it and keen to learn more. Our child is very happy with his school, teacher and peers - but refuses to go a lot of mornings (we cajole/drag him there). Can't work out if this is just recalcitrant 5 y r old stuff or something more. Advice/experiences welcome!

[Otta]

My daughter can be a bloody nightmare in the mornings, but I honestly think it';s just because she likes her home comforts and hanging with her sister. Once she's there she's fine, and she always comes out smiling.

But it makes mornings a total bastard!

[edanna]

Is he still in Reception Belle?

[minder]

Is he a good sleeper? Maybe just initial tiredness at beginning of the day.

[Belle]

Thanks Otta - good to know we are not alone! Sounds v similar to our experience.

Edanna, no - year 1 now - so don't think it's just a getting used to school thing. And thanks Minder, he is a good sleeper but nontheless I do sometimes think he's still tired - often doesn't drop off for a while at night (despite our best attempts) - and he seems fine once he goes in.

[hichm]

Yes initial tiredness I think.

It's important to take extra time to wake them early enough (a full 1h15mns before having to leave home), have them something else to do before leaving home that can be part of the pre school routine, so they wake up properly... and then go.

Also, re their experience of the matter, going to school leisurely is much better than going stressed (to drop them off quickly and then rush off to work)...

All of this of course requires an early sleep at night, for them, and for you as well:-)

[kemurf]

We have just experienced something similar with our daughter, in Yr 2. She refused to go to school, she would not budge and yes we literally dragged her into school too.

She loved going to the drop in Breakfast Club. We couldn't understand why actually going to school was a problem.

We spoke to the teachers, they reviewed the lining up in the playground and stuff in the classroom. She was then asked to do 'jobs' in her classroom 2 mins before the bell, cleaning the white board etc. and points on the class reward chart for doing so.

The Home-School mentor got involved too, and that was helpful. Finally she is going to school, no probs. hooray. We with the school got over her issues and we broke the cycle.

Talk to school, arrange to meet the teacher with a brief explanation why so he/she is prepared; they have seen this many times before I am sure. Reward charts, be clear with your expectations and be consistent managing behaviour, both parents! We weren't very joined up, we realised...

And hopefully it is just a phase.

Good luck.

[Belle]

This is really helpful - wasn't sure whether to involve teacher or not as I know it's not really about the school itself, but I'll definitely bring it up.