Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Some people say romance is dead but I disagree. There are some really romantic, delightful blokes out there. Then very occasionally you meet one who makes Medallion Man look refined and attractive.


I recently encountered an individual who seemed reasonably intelligent and fairly charming. Then - before there even was a first date - his entire persona seemed to unravel and his behaviour was so oily and laughable and offensive that I kept thinking Ashton Kutcher was going to suddenly appear and tell me I'd just been Punk'd.


Highlights from this particular individual included


"Shall I bring a pizza from my pizza shop over to your flat so we can f-u-c-k?"


and then some random 'joke' about the tightness of some woman's vagina.


And this all came entirely out of the blue and before we'd even fixed up a date. Needless to say I declined. Instead of accepting my rejection graciously he continued to try to cajole me into this pizza and sex business (Klassy....) and added, "try it, you might even like it." I'm not sure whether he meant I might like the pizza or his one-inch penis.


Anyone else encountered any shockingly lame chat-up lines lately?

mockney piers Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I take it that's a no to the pizza then...damn?

>

> Is your dad a thief? Cos he took the stars from

> the sky

> and...phhhzzz....blt.....BBBBBRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrr


I reckon it's probably a 'no' to the comestibles, Mockney but if you spruce up and recover the second part, the shag might still be viable.

jimmy two times Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I'm assuming his initial chat up line wasn't too

> lame as you described him as seeimng charming.

> Sounds like he could open well enough but had

> difficulties closing the deal.


That's true. He did ok at first and then deteriorated at an astonishing rate. The best part was his seeming confusion at the fact that the offer of pizza and a f*ck didn't impress me. He kept asking, "but why not?">:D:D<

I think if you go to one of those no strings attached type dating groups you might get away with asking for/demanding a shag straight away from some sexed-up, fun-loving or genuinely desperate chick. I think it's best to leave the pizza out of the equation entirely. It's just so.....I dunno.....tawdry? CTFU


HonaloochieB Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> mockney piers Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > I take it that's a no to the pizza then...damn?

> >

> > Is your dad a thief? Cos he took the stars from

> > the sky

> > and...phhhzzz....blt.....BBBBBRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

>

> I reckon it's probably a 'no' to the comestibles,

> Mockney but if you spruce up and recover the

> second part, the shag might still be viable.

I was chatting with a few female friends about worse chat up lines the other day..

Here were some of the worst-


Have you got a mirror in your knickers coz I can see my face in your c***. Yes, he did use that word.


Can you feel the chemistry between us?? My friend said "No!!!"


The following one was used by a pal of my brother- he went up to 2 girls who were in my brothers' class and said "We call you two, Thelma and Louise & I'm the rapist" Ermm, he didn't get far with that one..

Andystar Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I was chatting with a few female friends about

> worse chat up lines the other day..

> Here were some of the worst-

>

> Have you got a mirror in your knickers coz I can

> see my face in your c***. Yes, he did use that

> word.

>

> Can you feel the chemistry between us?? My friend

> said "No!!!"

>

> The following one was used by a pal of my brother-

> he went up to 2 girls who were in my brothers'

> class and said "We call you two, Thelma and Louise

> & I'm the rapist" Ermm, he didn't get far with

> that one..



OMG. Seems that gross and offensive 'chat-up' lines are becoming an epidemic. Were the guys who came out with these you've posted extremely pissed at the time?

jimmy two times Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> He obviously thought you'd be interested in a

> meatfeast.


Yeah but you just know a dude as lame as that doesn't have much meat to offer. At all. :)-D

HellNoHellYeah Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------


> OMG. Seems that gross and offensive 'chat-up'

> lines are becoming an epidemic. Were the guys who

> came out with these you've posted extremely pissed

> at the time?



I'm not sure, probably- nothing worse than a sleazy drunk..


So where did you meet this "Prince Charming" then??

Andystar Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> HellNoHellYeah Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----


> So where did you meet this "Prince Charming"

> then??



At a job interview in a strip joint...>:D<

Mikecg Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I'm glad no one asked what a 68 was.



You know that thread you started about looking back and wishing you hadn't written something?? ;-)


Please tell me no woman has been dumb enough to respond positively to this suggestion?

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • It was a weird place, and there never seemed to be many people in it. Stalls/selling areas (they  weren't really stalls as such) came and went. For a while there was an area upstairs as well. Around the beginning of ED  gentrification,  someone opened a champagne bar near the entrance. I think it also sold oysters, though there was another oyster place in the market, possibly not at the same time. Whether it did or not, unsurprisingly it didn't last long. I can't imagine they had done any market research, or even wondered why anybody would want to drink champagne in that kind of environment. I'm not sure an indoor market would work now, but what do I know. It would depend on what it sold and whether people wanted what it sold, I suppose. It wouldn't get much passing trade in Zenoria Street, so it would have to be very well advertised.
    • Guacamoles in Rye Lane market for pretty authentic Tacos  Ganapati on Holly Grove has some of the best south Indian  food in London - light, aromatic fresh, home style cooking - lovely location and people too. Forzawine is fun for a rooftop terrace, great view, cocktails and good small plates     
    • Someone to carve Dulwich posts.  Any recommendations?
    • Hello, is anyone looking to sell their car? I’m looking for a reliable runaround and finding a lot of spam/scammers on other sites, so thought I would put the word out more locally thanks.
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...