Picked on in ED

[Northeastview]

i just replied to a thread on the gossip page on the forum. It was started as a statement about child free pubs/ spaces in ED, but has become a rant against parents and kids. Just makes me feel sad that we are all working so hard to care for our little ones as well as our community and they think so little of us and our efforts. Don't we deserve a little slack and some support?

[canela]

yep

[ludoscotts]

Considering this is such a famoly friendly area this forum has always been quite negative when any thread mentions children in pubs. Used to get me down too but I started to notice it was the same names cropping up again and Again being negative about lots of threads not just children in pubs so came to the conclusion that there is a lot of bitter people who like coming on here to stir up trouble rather than offer support and advice. I don't generally now read any sections other than the family bits because of this. Please don't take it personally people haven't been nice on this subject for years.

[Otta]

Without wanting to be labelled a bully, grow up and form a backbone for God's sake.

I have kids, I adore my kids, but not everyone will. You need to realise that your wonderful beautiful children are just irritating noisy bothersome things to other people (including other parents to be honest, we all like our own kids).

People without kids have just as much right to not want kids around as you do to want your kids in public places.

And whilst most parents are perfectly reasonable, there are some (probably a small number, but they stand out) really really selfish entitled arseholes out there who seem to think the world should fit their agenda rather than them fitting in to the society they live in.

[srisky]

Also remember that people remember their childhoods and their parenting skills with rose-tinted specs. Much in the same way that their darlings always slept through, always are their greens and never forgot their P's & Q's. Flash forwards 20y and we may become those same people, too!

[Saffron]

Perhaps we should forgive them their senility?

However, the essence of entitled-arsehole-ism is multi-directional.

[Saffron]

Being sensitive is a great quality, btw. Relish your deficiency in the backbone department. It leads to better flexibility. ;-)

[mima08]

Saffron Wrote:

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> Being sensitive is a great quality, btw. Relish

> your deficiency in the backbone department. It

> leads to better flexibility. ;-)

^^^want to press the "like" button :)

[????]

Some people just don't really like other people -big, small, different, different accent, new, unknown to them etc. It's their problem really, I wouldn't worry about it. Social Media exaggerates it. Out their the vast majority of people of all sorts, with all their flaws, are basically decent.

[keane]

And whilst most parents are perfectly reasonable, there are some (probably a small number, but they stand out) really really selfish entitled arseholes out there who seem to think the world should fit their agenda rather than them fitting in to the society they live in.

Or to put another way....

And whilst most non parents are perfectly reasonable, there are some (probably a small number, but they stand out) really really selfish entitled arseholes out there who seem to think the world should fit their agenda rather than them fitting into the society they live in.

[uncleglen]

The worst ones imo are the foreign people who take their pre-school/nursery children into sainsbury's and then speak to them in Polish,Spanish, French or whatever their native language is. The shop is an excellent place to use English so that your child, when he/she goes to school, will be able to converse with the English speaking children and not need remedial classes which, imo, is a waste of vital resources.

[Northeastview]

Thanks for the support. I've had some very trying times with my two but mostly people showed some camaraderie, were kind and offered help, this is something I try to keep up myself when someone is clearly having a difficult day, who hasn't been grateful for the person on the bus who plays peekaboo with your toddler when you are completing your 10th commute of the week? Or who chats to them whilst you get your first mouthful of food for the day at a cafe.

Smiling again

[Otta]

There are always more nice people out there than not.

[Otta]

keane Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> And whilst most parents are perfectly reasonable,

> there are some (probably a small number, but they

> stand out) really really selfish entitled

> arseholes out there who seem to think the world

> should fit their agenda rather than them fitting

> in to the society they live in.

>

>

> Or to put another way....

>

> And whilst most non parents are perfectly

> reasonable, there are some (probably a small

> number, but they stand out) really really selfish

> entitled arseholes out there who seem to think the

> world should fit their agenda rather than them

> fitting into the society they live in.

Well yes, you could change the word "parents" with anything really. Cyclists / car drivers works well based on numerous boring threads on this forum where neither side can see pst their own front wheel.

But what you're doing in your post is creating an us and them attitude.

Having a child makes you a parent, but you're still a human and not suddenly a different species from those that don't, for whatever reason, have kids. The world owes us nothing, we choose to have kids, and we have to accept all the sleepness nights and hard work that come with them. That's the deal. We shouldn't then expect the rest of the world to fit around us and our children.

I am often made to feel slightly sick when I see things like "us mummies (it's always the mothers, they don't seem to think dads count) do the hardest and most important job in the world". Really?

This isn't meant to sound like an argumentative post, I just get wound up by people that seem to think having kids somehow seems to transform them in to some sort of higher being.

[keane]

Not what I was saying atall - was trying to state exactly the opposite - that Otta said 'parents' and I was saying that of course parents or non parenys or anyone else of course can be nightmares! I want the opposite of an us and them culture. Think the thread on the main forum has just turned into a parent bashing thread which is a bit sad. The same thing happens with dogs sometimes - it's not the dogs it's the owners.

[Curmudgeon]

Oh streuth

And what otta said

If you are the type of parent who does their utmost to ensure their children understand how to behave in all environments and does not expect for example pedestrians to make way for speeding scooters, a tantrumming child to remain in situ in a restaurant or pub rather than being removed until they calm down etc then you will have no issues at all.

[yeknomyeknom]

Northeast view and Keane, I feel you. Unfortunately, this thread is also headed in the wrong direction. For the same reason. The forum can be tiresome in this way. People be people.

[Bonfire2010]

More or less agree with what Otta says...still, seems a bit mean to have linked to this thread in the Lounge so that others can basically take the p*s$. If you don't agree with what the OP says then that's totally fine and you've responded here. Flagging it to those on the other sections who rarely see anyone's point of view other than their own seems unnecessary.

[BrandNewGuy]

keane Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Think the thread on the main forum has

> just turned into a parent bashing thread.

You must be reading a different thread to me.

[Otta]

Bonfire2010 Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> More or less agree with what Otta says...still,

> seems a bit mean to have linked to this thread in

> the Lounge so that others can basically take the

> p*s$. If you don't agree with what the OP says

> then that's totally fine and you've responded

> here. Flagging it to those on the other sections

> who rarely see anyone's point of view other than

> their own seems unnecessary.

You're probably right, although "rarely see anyone's point of view other than their own" is not a fair way to describe users of the lounge.

And some things deserve to have the piss taken, even if it is a bit mean.

[Otta]

This was posted in the main section, and I think sums things up nicely for me.

http://www.renegademothering.com/2015/07/21/dickinrestaurants/