Chivalry...bring it back!

[Jeremy]

As for wearing heels - that's a choice. It doesn't mean you deserve special treatment. I don't think many jobs specifically require high heels.

[maxxi]

Jeremy Wrote:

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I don't think

> many jobs specifically require high heels.

Oh you silly naive boy... size 10 Louboutins aint for weekend amateurs.

[phobic3000]

What age is somebody considered old? I have received the odd look from people probably aged around 50-60 for not giving up my seat when they look perfectly healthy and comfortable. You don't want to offend people by making them feel old.

Also once I tried to offer my seat to a really old guy who looked around 90 and he practically wrestled me back into my seat insisting on standing.

I would never give my seat up for a woman unless she was pregnant, old / struggling or with little ones.

[womanofdulwich]

it is a minefield - can someone invent an app for this? Like uber- I'm on the bus /tube / train standing up - is there someone on this deck that will give up there seat for me?

[numbers]

Jeremy Wrote:

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> I sympathise with the OP. Perhaps you need to get

> yourself down to the gym and get in shape. Update

> your wardrobe and get a nice haircut, maybe take

> more time on your makeup in the morning. I'm sure

> you've got it in you to bag a nice husband with a

> good job.

:))

[genwilliams]

I'm a pretty trenchant feminist. But if someone offers me their seat on the train (I don't expect them to, I'm in my early 30s so no-one would assume I need it), I'm happily surprised - I'll take it and say thank you. Transport during rush hour can be pretty self-serving and unfriendly, people shoving each other to get on packed trains etc - so something like that is refreshingly unselfish.

A chap about my age got up and gave me his seat on the tube the other day and I just thought "how kind!" and thanked him. I can't tell you what his motivation for doing so was, but he wasn't flirty, creepy or patronising, so I just took it as a simple act of kindness.

I agree that expectations about this sort of thing should generally be reserved for those less able to stand. But I don't think the pursuit of equality has to stop people doing nice things for each other. I like benefitting from chivalry, and I pay it back to both men and women; I like the idea of delinking it from problematic oldskool expectations about how men & women relate to each other. I guess if men and women all behaved in traditionally 'chivalrous' ways to each other, rather than it being how men "should" treat women (or are told they shouldn't any more), as a society we would just look out for each other more.

LadyDeliah Wrote:

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> No don't! With chivalry comes expectations and

> preconditions, plus a load of other baggage women

> have tried to get rid of for the past century.

>

> Eff that. I'd rather stand up than have someone

> patronise me.

>

> If someone is less able to stand, whether they are

> male or female, they should be given a seat. If

> your feet are killing because you are wearing high

> or tight shoes, get a pair of trainers.

[Loz]

genwilliams Wrote:

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> I'm a pretty trenchant feminist.

and

> I like benefitting from chivalry

reminds me of the famous Grouch Marx quote: "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others."

[Angelina]

Perhaps, OP, a little radical rethink on your part could save us all the aggro of guessing if you want to sit down/ will get offended if you're asked by actually saying "Excuse me, would you mind? I really could do with sitting down...."

I can't imagine many Londoners would actually ignore you.

[Ridgley]

It nice to see Chivalry there are many women that appreciate it from you guys;)