Trapped in lift with a 'Celebrity' Chef?

[Judy2]

He won't be happy Bob.

[Mick Mac]

Whoops - what Judy2 said. Can't be bothered to edit it.

[Mick Mac]

Tony.London Suburbs Wrote:

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> Gordon Ramsey lost it on Breakfast this morning

> with Bill Turnball.

>

> He asked him if he "still does any cooking" (

> given his media career)...:))

I saw that TLS - it was quite amusing. Turnball asked if he could ever hope to have a meal cooked by Gordon Ramsey in one of his restaurants these days.

Ramsey said that if you buy an Armani suit do you expect Georgio did the stictching.

Shows how he is thunking about the Ramsey brand. Its no longer about him being anything to do with the kitchen.

[Mick Mac]

*Bob* Wrote:

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> Monica,

> I'm building-up a profile of your dream man.

>

> Building design - Kevin McLeod ('dishy')

> Cooking - Hugh F-W ('adorable')

>

> Who will be next..?

She's quite keen on Gary McCausland.

I really miss the hills and I am looking forward to

Larkrise to Candleford returning.

Mick Mac knows that sexy Gary from the property show, wow hes a dish, give me a rugged man from Northern Ireland and I will give you my undivided attention. Now thats a Guilty pleasure

[????]

No goal. 2 self assists

[HonaloochieB]

Mick Mac Wrote:

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> Tony.London Suburbs Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > Gordon Ramsey lost it on Breakfast this morning

> > with Bill Turnball.

> >

> > He asked him if he "still does any cooking" (

> > given his media career)...:))

>

>

> I saw that TLS - it was quite amusing. Turnball

> asked if he could ever hope to have a meal cooked

> by Gordon Ramsey in one of his restaurants these

> days.

> Ramsey said that if you buy an Armani suit do you

> expect Georgio did the stictching.

>

> Shows how he is thunking about the Ramsey brand.

> Its no longer about him being anything to do with

> the kitchen.

Shows what a slobo interviewer Turnbull is.

Surely the response should have been " So if I spilled Gordon Ramsey food on my Armani suit, which dry cleaner would you recommend"?

It's all the time taking them seriously that makes them become as self-important as (and in GR's case strongly resemble) Mr Toad.

Take a plump in-season Gordon.

Look him up and down. Screw up face. Shake head. Add fresh tut-tutting. Repeat for at least two hours. Overnight if possible.

Throw water in his face, drag him to a stove with a mirror in front of it and get him to do the Saturday Morning Kitchen Omelette Challenge.

Against himself.

As he frots the pan in desperation, all the while givig panic-stricken looks into his own empty eyes, you produce one James Martin, who lards the competition with mentions of Yorkshire. And Yorkshiremen. And his gran. And bloody f@cking bastard Yorkshire.

Nicely drizzled in a sweat jus, your Gordon finishes his omelette.

Yorkshireman James Martin, stuffs the Gordon with a shoving up his arse of a 'that omelete'd be clucking 'round farmyard up in Yorkshire so I'm thraiped if I'll allow it on my show'.

Cleverly Martin informs your Gordon that his time is worse even than irritating East European woman, which causes your Gordon's blood pressure to rise. Internal basting, good work, that Yorkshireman.

Martin, a Yorkshireman by trade, then asks your Gordon to vote for special guest Ritchie Blackmore's food heaven or food hell.

Heaven - a bacon sandwich with HP sauce.

Hell - a bacon sandwich without HP sauce.

At this point your Gordon will start to cry, allow this to continue as the saline solution will tenderise and start the cooking process of the cheeks. These are a delicacy. Though of course shortlived ones.

Your Gordon will now be almost ready to consume.

Cover your Gordon in sarcasm, the rare herb uxorcontemptuous and a light dusting arrongance.

Grill your Gordon for approximately five minutes, turning halfway through to ensure both faces are thoroughly cooked.

Don't worry about dishing up, your Gordon is self-serving.

[woofmarkthedog]

Hmm I think i'll order a chinese instead.

[HonaloochieB]

woofmarkthedog Wrote:

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> Hmm I think i'll order a chinese instead.

I think I dislike Ken Hom more than Gordon Ramsey or Fanny Craddock.

How many more times is he going to tell an audience that the the way to tell if oil is hot enough, is to drop a small ball of bread into said oil? And watch it sizzle.

Enough already you turtle-faced bore.

Do one. And if you have a brother of that name, it's a coincidence, it's you i'm talikng to, sod off!

[woofmarkthedog]

Well now I have indigestion thanks

Bread balls my arse.....

Grr

W**F

Saved any wine for the sauce ?

[RosieH]

HonaloochieB Wrote:

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> I think I dislike Ken Hom more than Gordon Ramsey

> or Fanny Craddock.

Ken Hom weighs his poo.

[HonaloochieB]

RosieH Wrote:

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> HonaloochieB Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

>

> > I think I dislike Ken Hom more than Gordon

> Ramsey

> > or Fanny Craddock.

>

> Ken Hom weighs his poo.

When I first heard this, I thought it was referring to his partner.

If you're suggesting it involves bagging and bunging on the Salter scales, then my initial antipathy is confirmed.

Still, at least I never made a mention of 'wok on by', so I'll never be as sh!t as Hom.

[RosieH]

I can tell you that after a good healthy Chinese meal, Ken would expect to lose about 25g (if memory serves).

I didn't bag it - he shared this information over lunch.

[Mick Mac]

I would have thought that my 4 year old can beat 25 grams comfortably. I would not weigh it to confirm, but I'd be very confident if ever a weigh in could be arranged with mr hom that she would win comfortably, or at least at a push.

[Ladymuck]

Relative newcomer Valentine Warner does it for me...I just ADORE his cheeky grin and the way he stuffs his face with anything ranging from wild berries in the woods to a freshly made scone piled sky high with jam and cream...delightful...he reminds me of myself...a real glutton with a passion for anything remotely scrumdiddlylicious

[Ladymuck]

She can butter my bagette anytime she wants

Baguette!? Well, aren't YOU just the epitome of "modesty" itself!;-)

[monica]

mmm me thinks whilst I have been away my dream man has been about.

Gary Mccauslands Face, Hugh whatsists cooking skills and adorable glasses, oh and my secret crush's eyes. Sorry off topic but hey I mentioned Hugh whatsit.>:D< mmmm

[HonaloochieB]

monica Wrote:

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> mmm me thinks whilst I have been away my dream man

> has been about.

> Gary Mccauslands Face, Hugh whatsists cooking

> skills and adorable glasses, oh and my secret

> crush's eyes. Sorry off topic but hey I mentioned

> Hugh whatsit.>:D< mmmm

I know Monica, some Thursdays I allow the Peroni to get the better of me as well.

Sleep tight.