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Had my daughter baptised earlier this year CoE at St Giles in Camberwell and the stipulations were the same as those outlined by Trinity - we are outside the boundaries but they were happy to book us in for the christening after a couple of months attendance (this was not stipulated by them, my choice to attend to get a sense of the church having no experience of CoE). I found them very welcoming and the fact that we are unmarried was never brought up as I feared it would be in a catholic church (I was brought up catholic). Still attending and quite enjoy it - its a really friendly church.

The position of the Catholic Church and the CoE are quite different. Because it is the "established church" the C of E is obliged to do weddings, baptisms etc. for anyone living within the parish. They also will often do a "Ceremony of thanksgiving" for lukewarm believers who want a nice "hello baby" type of event. I've been to a few of these and they've been lovely events that were right for the families in question.


When a baby is baptised in the Catholic faith the parents and God parents are taking on a responsibility to bring the child up as a Catholic -- this means weekly church attendance, and adherence to Catholic belief. At least one of the God parents has to be a Catholic in good standing. It's not a naming ceremony as is often believed, but a sacrament in which the child is reborn in Christ and becomes a member of the body of the Church. Clearly, if you're not a believer this isn't for you!


Asking about Church attendance is a shortcut to finding out if you're actually a practising Catholic: Catholics are obliged to attend Mass at least weekly, and seek absolution and receive Holy Communion at least once a year. It's pretty straightforward - it's a choice, you're either in or you're out. I can't really understand why anyone who isn't a Catholic would want to make promises they won't be able to keep and profess things in which they don't believe. It's also rather disrespectful to want a sacrament in which they have no belief, but I suspect that most non-church-goers asking for Catholic baptisms do not realise this.


On the other hand, if you really wish for your child to be baptised as a Catholic then by all means join the parish: you will be welcomed. Many people find that having children makes them think about their faith again, ask themselves some of the big questions, try going back to church and find that it's a good thing for them and their family. St. Thomas More is a friendly and busy parish, filled with young families (and no, they aren't just there for the school -- many are at local non-Catholic state or independent schools, others home educate, etc.). It's a great and varied parish community. Even the daily Mass is busy - from young mums to older couples, there's at least 50+ every morning at 9:30. For those interested - there's tea and coffee after the 9am and 10:30 Sunday Masses which is a good way to meet others.


For parents who want a loosely Christian ceremony of thanksgiving, welcome and naming, the C of E Ceremony of Thanksgiving seems to make a lot more sense, won't offend anyone, won't require any changes of belief or lifestyle, and will probably be more to most people's liking if they're not church attenders already.


Different strokes for different folks!

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