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on the same topic, from today's Fiver


"800 YEARS AND 90 MINUTES OF OPPRESSION

With half of his native country submerged under water and its economy in ruins, the Fiver's knobbly stick-waving, green felt hat-wearing, alcoholic Irish cousin Theme Pub O'Fiver has lots to be worrying about. Needless to say, the Republic O'Ireland's non-participation in next year's Adidas Coca-Cola Emirates Kia Sony Visa Budweiser Castrol Continental McDonald's MTN Satyam FNB Neo Africa Prasa Telekom Ultimate Macari's Traditional Fish And Chips World Cup finals is first and foremost on his list of concerns.

Younger Fiver readers may not be aware of the fact that the Irish had actually been given a bye to the World Cup final, only for Thierry Henry to throw a spanner in the works by picking up the ball in a qualifying play-off, running the length of the Stade de France pitch and flinging it at William Gallas's head to set up the goal that earned France a place in South Africa at O'Ireland's expense. The bollix.

Needless to say, the Irish accepted this setback in much the way you'd expect from a country that prides itself on being the world's friendliest, most laid-back race, whinging so incessantly about the injustice of it all that they've now been reduced to the lowly status of Object of Ridicule for Fifa president Sepp Blatter.


"They have asked, very humbly 'Can't we be team No33 at the World Cup?' They have asked for that, really," giggled Sepp, conjuring up images of poor auld Theme Pub tugging his forelock, repeatedly shouting the words "turty-tree" and being escorted out of the dormant volcano that serves as Fifa HQ by the hired muscle. "I will bring it to the attention of the executive committee but if we do that, we will also have to bring in Costa Rica," Sepp added, alluding to the offside goal that helped Uruguay win their play-off against the Costa Ricans, which nobody cares about because Riverdance wasn't invented in Central America.


In the extremely unlikely event that Fifa decides to pander to O'Ireland's wishes, the Football Association of Ireland is set to table assorted other completely reasonable requests, among them a demand that they be allowed to play in January's African Cup of Nations and be appointed 1961 Double winners instead of Spurs.


"The FAI today confirmed that it attended an hour-and-a-half meeting, at its request, with Mr Sepp Blatter, President of Fifa, on Friday in Zurich," diddly-ayed an FAI statement issued earlier today, confirming that the amount of time that the put-upon Irish have spent under the heel of oppression from assorted overlords now stretches 90 minutes beyond the usual 800 years.

"

Frankly I think 32 teams is too many in the WC never mind 33 or 34. I would like it reduced to 16 teams as it used to be. However I would make some changes. I would have 14 qualifiers and 2 unlucky losers. YES unlucky, cheated out of disgracefully, victim of offside goal, handballed goal, penalty not given, blind ref/assistant.........that sort of thing. Those who apply would be entered in a Eurovision type contest where they could put their case forward by means of what actually happened in the match but more importantly what they would bring to the WC. Fact is in Ireland's case we wouldn't bring a WC winnning team,that's for sure. However we would bring a stimulus to the local economy by having a huge number of supporters going on the lash for a couple of weeks and not being any bother to the locals or the police!


What I want to know is.............can Georgia say that? Ha!

  • 1 year later...

Mick Mac Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> This picture is just before he also grabbed it

> with this other hand and ran into the net with

> it.

> http://www.lequipe.fr/Medias/Football/200911/430x313/les-bleus-dans-la-douleur.jpg



Goal no 51 is a "no counter".......

Mick Mac Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> He will have extensive trial by media which will

> be worse. It will be shown around the world and

> his reputation will be harmed in the eyes of any

> fair minded person and this will be his

> punishment.

>

> He will be a loner and atila will be his only

> friend. Thats worse than purgatory.




A trip back in time - My favourite ever post.....:))

Number 13 is hitting him on the head which caused his hand to hit the ball, so it should have been a pen anyway. Shame you couldn't have produced this new evidence at the time. It would have saved a lot of heartache.


PS Henry would have taken the pen and scored. Back to 51.

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