footee up

[studdud]

young veterans 30+ no limit, looking to kick off with extra players- 5 aside or 11 aside- sat morning or Friday night 5 aside. Ruskin or Dulwich Park- all TBC> No skills required or appropriate.

[woofmarkthedog]

Oh I know someone who will play ...

He ( my friend & yours ) sent me this as a P.M

Well back in the days of 1931 I used to play for the then hot team "Rye Rovers" . Mamm used to drag me there on a one wheeled sack trolley when she had some spare time on day release from her "Iron Lung".

Did I mention I had withering polio in both legs ?

No, but that didn't stop me becoming top scorer in our team . So when ever there were a penalty or set piece I would be strapped into a body harness and fired down a strategically placed zip wire , my useless legs jangling behind me until I connected with the ball, I gathered such a mighty momentum It made a save impossible.

The team goal keepers were always recruited from the pleurisy ward, which evened things up I thought.Eventually the "Sweet F.A" as they were known then banned mechanical assistance in goal scoring.

The cat went mad & joined Moseley's blackshirts and moved in with Nancy Mitford for a short while. I didn't last though as the cat broke a crucial piece of Clarence Clift "bizarre" ( a milk jug I think ) at a bloomsbury set tea party.

Dad was always too busy to come watch ,his job as a human conduit was mens work & him manually connecting the overhead power line to the tram engine 12 hours a day, he often came home smoldering & his hair all stood on end with the static charge he carried.

He wept when our last chicken died "That chicken had heart" he cried before falling down the stairs, smashing the whiskey bottle he'd hidden in his jacket.

His trousers round his ankles, Izal in his rear end still. I'd have kicked him if I could but all I could do was throw some tinned ham at him.

Mum though was furious, fogging up the inverted mirror she viewed the world from & restrained within the contraption she so depended on for breath

"I'll waste no more on him" she spurted in between the "Psshh" & Puccht " that accompanied her daily life. Thats when the meter ran out , Mums lips went blue until I found her purse & flicked a "tanner" in, saving the day.

We later booked a trip on the Hindenberg . I really looked forward to trips like that, flying down "Hardship lane" like we were talk of the town.

[Ladymuck]

woofmarkthedog Wrote:

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> Oh I know someone who will play ...

>... Well back in the days of 1931...

*rolling around on floor crying/laughing*

Very clever doggie.

Erm, I thought I'd ordered the vet to...

Bye the way, offtopic...but I'd love to play football (in a ladies' team)...anyone know where/how?